That we shall have a child seemed certain to me, though Susannah cannot quite allow herself to trust it. I watched her sleep. The knowledge of it filled me with so much joy and gut-wrenching terror, too, for I could not live without her. Valentina haunted me and I crossed myself, whispering an act of contrition asking for God’s mercy on me. Susannah must know of her but not yet. Not now. When they are both safe, please God. But I think she will not understand why I have kept it from her for so long. And how can I explain? She opened her soul to me, and I withheld mine from her.
The King did not attend our wedding ceremony in the Chapel Royal though, unexpectedly my mamma, who had fortuitously decided to visit quite unaware of my forthcoming marriage, did. There was a Mass afterwards in th
