Pools of Blood

chapter 42

I had never been to Damyang after that incident which happened two decades ago. Once I was posted at Damyang by the police force, but I denied it. Simply the thought of staying in that place haunted me. I never thought that one day I would have to confront my worst fears. I never thought that one day my nightmares will return and I will have to face them bravely. All these years, the love of Amiya, and her mother’s warmth and care kept me protected and safe from those horrors. Each night I used to dream of the blood, the bodies, and the blasted house. But slowly, Alfred’s mom made all those go away. She was patient with me, she stayed with me all night clutching me into her arms and caressing my hair, just as my own real mother would have done. 

Whenever someone asked me about my parentage and my past life, I excused myself from the conversation with some silly talks. Every time Alfred asked me, I avoided the topic, there was nothing to tell. I was too young then, I didn’t even remember their names or their faces clearly.

The car sped towards the southernmost tip of the country. The county of Damyang –Gun was beautiful. It was a famous spot for bamboo cultivation. Acres and acres of land are all covered by the tall green bamboos with leaves shadowing the road from both sides. Every year lots of people come here to spend vacations with their loved ones, all except me. I feared that place. It had turned into a phobia. The simple name created a sense of degradation inside me. 

Before the departure, I revealed all about Damyang and my life to jasmine. She was the first and only human with whom I shared my lifelong secret. Why I did that I didn’t know. Maybe we are both floating on the same sea on a single raft and we deserved to be true to each other to complete this mission.

She empathized with me on my tragedy and clasped my hand into hers.

"Believe me, Micheal, I know the pain of losing one’s family. I know the pain of becoming an orphan. I know it all. I can very well understand the hell you went through. Alone, traumatized, injured, and temporarily deaf for a child of eight. You are brave enough to pass through it, many would have quit long ago."

I nodded.

" I would have quitted too hadn’t God sent me Alfred and Amiya and mom. They were the ones who kept me alive. And God took them away again. From the day Amiya dies, the nightmares have returned to torment me again. Each night I drink myself to sleep. I can never overcome those flashes of memories ever".

-" You can and you will. All you need is a bit of peace. We don’t have peace in our minds. I can't sleep at night. Every time I close my tired eyelids, those flashes of Alfred dying, his bloodied face, his last smile all flood in my brain. I can't sleep until I take pills. They are killing me, Michael."

Jasmine clutched her head into her hands and cried. I could do nothing to console her. I was in the same hell too. I knew what she was going through. When Amiya died, I almost became frenzy and mad. Bo Chang gave me leave for a few months to overcome my condition. Although my chaotic brain silenced over time, the rage inside my heart is still at large. It would never go until I die. She was a part of me and they took her away. Frank killed both of our loved ones, destroyed both of our lives. Jasmine was right. f**k Rules. f**k Laws. When I get him, he would beg for mercy. Just the way Amiya did.

" Why are we going there? ", Jasmine asked after some time.

-" Because if I and Frank are related, that place would definitely provide some clue about it."

She agreed and looked outside the window. We rode the rest of the journey in silence, plunged deep into our own thoughts.

The outside ambiance is exquisite. A stretch of Metasequoia trees bordered the whole route. The beautiful fragrance of the strawberries pervaded the whole area. We could see the ancient Pagodas and pavilions and the famous fortress from our windows. Damyang is known as the most peaceful town in the country. No criminal records, no villanies or riots have ever happened. For all the people of the world, this place provided the best cuisines in bamboo and the calm serenity of their souls. But for me, none of these held any pleasure. If there was anything called hell in the world, for me, Damyang was the place. This place took my mother away from me. This place took my father away from me. How could it ever provide me peace?

We asked a few locals for the exact direction of the place. Sun was already on the threshold of its house and a lowly twilight would veil the night sky. The car stopped near the Gaeseonsa temple. A narrow path led to stairs that ran all the way up to the hills and disappeared into a large bamboo forest.

We came out of the car.

Jasmine looked questioningly at me.

I pointed at the forest above the temple.

"We have to climb these stairs and reach the forest."

-" Why? ", she looked bewildered at the prospect of climbing more than a hundred stony stairs in the setting sun. " It looks dangerous. We can slip and fall and break our neck."

I laughed.

" There is no place here to cover our heads for the night. The only lodge is above there in the forest. And so is my house. "