The family secret

7 - My name is ??

She woke up by two strong hands, pulling her of the bed. She didn't scream. Screaming would only make it worse. She fell down hard on the wooden floor. Pain coursed through her left shoulder and she knew it would turn blue within minutes. She didn't move, she didn't look up to him. She knew who it was, the one who woke her. Don't make eye contact. Never make eye contact.

‘You little piece of s**t!’ he yelled at her. ‘Why aren't you cleaning? You thought you could sleep in today? Just because it's called summer holidays it means you can sit around and do nothing!’ As he got a hold of her long blond curls, she let out a little whimper. The pain in her scalp felt like little knifes when he lifted her off the ground. ‘Answer me, you stupid girl!’

‘I-I'm sorry.’ she whispered. It has been four years since she spoke out loud. Now she only whispered or stayed silent. She fell back on the ground when his hands let go of her hair. He kicked into her stomach, making her flinch, but she didn't make a sound. The girl curled to a little ball. Her hands around her stomach, trying to get a hold of her pain. Trying not to cry out loud.

‘I think a day in the basement would do you some good.’ the man said. He grabbed her right arm and lifted her up again.

‘No, no. Please, no.’ She didn't want to go to the basement. Not again. Not ever again. She found a hidden strength; she didn’t know she had and tried to get away from him. His grip only tightened when she tried. His nails were pressing into her skin, making little moon shapes on her arm. ‘Please.’ she whispered. The pain she felt was making it very hard not to cry in front of him. The blow to her face she got, let her tears free. She cried in silence. She felt dizzy of the hard blow to her left eye. She looked up to the man holding her. For a second her eyes met his. His eyes almost looked black. Black like the devil he was. His anger got a hold of him. As his daily punching bag, she was used to it, but it scared her still after all these years. She tried to walk with him, but he pulled her downstairs by her arm and her feet were failing her. He tossed her to the ground, so he could open the door to the basement. Tears were streaming down her face.

‘What has she done this time?’ a lady voice asked in annoyance.

‘She slept in. She knows she has duties and chores and she chose to sleep in.’

‘That stupid girl. She could stay in the basement for the rest of the week. I don't care. I can rent a cleaner in less than a minute.’

The girl on the ground only cried harder. Her mother, the woman who should love you and protect you, didn't care about her. She didn't raise her. She never even hugged her. She never felt her love.

‘That could be arranged.’ The man opened the door to the basement and got a hold of her hair again. This time she let out a scream of pain. He dragged her down the stone steps of the stairs. With every step she felt more pain. He didn't even bother to get her up her feet. It was dark, moldy and cold in the basement. Her thin body shivered from the cold. The man put on a tiny lamp. He lifted her up and pushed her against the wall. She closed her eyes. His face was close. Too close. She could feel his breathing on her face.

‘Open your eyes.’ he told her.

She didn't want to, but he would hurt her if she didn't. She opened her eyes and looked into his evil eyes. She felt a tear rolling down her face again. She didn't wipe the tear away, she didn't move, she didn't say anything. She just looked at him.

‘You're going to stay here for a whole week.’ He started. ‘Don't even try to call out for help. No one is going to help you. No one cares that you're here. No one cares about you at all.’ His words hurt, but she knew it was true. No one cares about her. He opened the steel door next to her. There were three locks he had to open first. With one hand he held her arm, the other the small lamp, and pushed her inside. The tiny room didn't have a light, only a dirty matrass and a bucket. The thought of using the bucket again to do her business, made her cry on the inside. She hated it. She hated being here. She hated her family. The man let go of her arm and she sat down on the dirty matrass. He kneeled before her and reached for her ankle. She watched him attach a chain to her ankle locked to the wall behind her, like he did every time she had been here. He put the tiny key back in his pocket, before talking to her again. ‘You're allowed one meal a day. I'm coming back for you tonight, to give you your medicine. Only if you behave and do everything I tell you to do, you're allowed to shower for five minutes. If you fail, I have to punish you.’ His finger rubbed his thumb over her cheek to wipe away a tear, she didn't know she had. His touch made her shiver. ‘Will you behave?’ he asked.

‘Yes.’ she whispered.

‘What did you say?’

‘Yes, I will behave, Jack.’

‘Good girl.’

She was called a lot of names over the years. b***h was almost a second name to her. She had been called: w***e, witch, stupid, devils' child, zombie, skeleton, but good girl wasn't one of them. She shivered again, but this time from the cold. She was thin, too thin. Her bones almost pressing out of her skin. She had scars from fifteen years of abuse all over her back, her arms and her legs. The last scar she got, was from a scissor. She didn't want to hurt herself, but she knew it was the only way to stop her panic attack. It was the only way to get out of her manic state. When Jack found out, he beat her unconscious and was left on the ground in her bathroom for hours. She couldn't defense herself; she was too weak.

He left her alone in the basement, closing the door and placing the three locks to keep her inside. The tiny red dot was the only thing she could see now the lamp had disappeared. The camera recorded her every move. This was her life. Her worthless s**t life. The reason why, was hard to believe. It didn't even have to do with her. But everyone hated her anyways.

To her family she was just the stupid girl.

To her mother she was the reason she hated her life.

To the school she was just the girl who didn't speak.

To her best friend she was everything.

To the world she didn't even existed.

The girl laid down on the dirty matrass. Her long blond curls hiding her face. She cried out loud, for the first time in weeks. This was her punishment. This was her life. She was just a girl nobody likes. The child that shouldn't have been born. The child her mother didn't want to have.

Her name is Shelly.