Coma

Our moments 2

■NYC, present time.

Theo’s POV.

I went through the dark rooms inside my house, and went to that room, where I kept my things there, my atelier, even I didn’t let anyone in here, it was a room for what I feel, like I did back in my house in Baldwin. Photos, drawings, colors, it was a mess. I looked at the room, my heart aching for the memories, I remember Kate, her eyes, her sparkly eyes, when she saw her portrait, how we were close, when I kissed her neck, how she was reacting, how she pulled on me hard, like she needed me like her oxygen, I needed her too, even if it’s just love, but it has impacted me, my life, my career, I wanted her to be in every step I did.

I Looked at the polaroid photos on the table. The photos that console me in my loneliest nights. She was in my hands, my little bird, I remember when she took those photos. I wish I could feel her again. I remember when I saw her at the mall, I felt my face when I remembered her touch on my face, in the car when she was drunk. When she bit my lips, when she put her nails in my body. I feel a physical ache for her, my soul is aching for her, I need to see her. But do I have the courage? She knows, I don’t like hospitals, if I went there, would you wake up and beat me? Blame me? Admonish me? Scream on me? I would love to see your eyes open again.

I am going to see you tonight.

■Baldwin, 2 years ago.

Theo’s POV.

“Get your stuff for three days, we are heading off to the Lake. We’re camping there for three days. What do you think?

-I love it, this would get us to know each other better, said Kate.

-No cellphones, just you and me.

-Just you and me. She said back.

-Are you going to tell anyone about this? I asked her.

-No, I am not. I am telling Nana, I am going on a vacation for few days to clear my mind. She can understand, Matteo and Dilan are together, and they’re busy enough in their stuff, since Matteo moved back and forth to NYC, with Elliot.

-Sounds perfect to me. I said. I am glad we are having this.

-Me too, her voice was tender. See you later, Theo.” She hung up.

Kate and I were together, I am going to make sure it will be unforgettable, she is the best thing that happened to me in my whole life.

I ordered a vintage emerald campervan, with a bed set for two people, a swing rope, yellow lightbulbs, kerosene, fishing tools, barbecue, coal. All the essential things, we might need in the nature.

As for Kate, she went shopping, she told me she brought everything else, fruit, water, something to entertain ourselves with, books, she had a guitar. If she knew, all I wanted was her next to me. It was a beautiful day gathering what I need to spend a special occasion with my person.

It was almost four pm. Everything was set. I found our spot, picked Kate in the campervan and headed to our destination.

It was at the forest by the huge lake. It was an old forest, like a really old forest, the trees were giant, majestic, holy and calm. Calm, that is what we need. I chose a good spot that showed us the field between the lake and the forest. It showed us the green hills that surrounded us, it was like we were having moments in heaven.

Kate was wearing a rural white dress, off shoulders, lilac flowers were printed on that dress, as she was walking, it was showing her curves that never failed to enchant me, her silky hair playing with the summer breeze, she was discovering the area nearby. She was so happy, like a little butterfly. She helped me set the camp, the lightbulbs settings with campervan battery. She put on the picnic rug, under an old tree, its trunk was thick, she put the picnic basket, set our lunch, juice, different type of cheese, grapes, fruit, raisins, wine and her oak guitar. It was almost the golden when we were almost done preparing our evening. When I sat on the picnic rug, I was looking at the sunset. There wasn’t any sound. Kate came and sat in front of me, between my arms, she relayed her head on my shoulder, she put on strawberries and vanilla scent, I kissed and sniffed her neck while I hugged her abdomen and we stared together at the beautiful sky.

“Now that we’re here, tell me more about you, I want to know everything about you, she said.

-What do you want to know about me?

-Everything, your childhood, your adventures, your love life, what you love. Anything that concerns you, is important to me. She tangled her fingers with mine, as a sign of assurance, I can’t stand her cuteness.

-I had a rough childhood, I wasn’t the type of boys who had a family, in contrary, my family was the worst, excepting Marie, my parents were cruel to us. Dad used to gamble, drink, he was pretty abusive, I was only four years, and once, he beat me, till I passed out, because he was drunk. He used to beat my mom too, r**e her sometimes, she was a domestic violence victim, I was too, but she couldn’t do anything. Marie was a result of an unwanted relation, and god if I tell you, mom hates us, because when she saw us, it reminded her of my father. She used to see a man while dad was away. If it wasn’t for Laurie and Damian, we would never make it. They were replacing our parents’ roles, they took care of our custody when mom ran away with her lover. They took care of our studies, food, like we were their own flesh, and I am grateful.

-I am sorry to hear this, she consoled me, you know you can tell me anything that bothers you, I will be here for you, always.

-I know, babygirl, what you don’t know is that you are the only real thing that happened to me. You’re pure, genuine, beautiful and brave. Tell me more about you. You were young when I was a senior.

-That’s true, you were a senior graduate when I was in the 8th grade. You used to study quantum physics when I studied basics of it.

My childhood wasn’t easy too, my parents left us to Norway when I was 12, I guess, you know, I came to a time, I didn’t remember my mother’s face. It’s true she called me from a time to another. But she didn’t come once to see us, it was always dad. I envy Nathalie.

-Who is Nathalie? I asked her. If she knew there is no one compared to her, why would she envy someone?

-My little sister.

-You have a sister!?

-Yes, she came to the world few months ago. My mom gave birth to her, this February. I don’t know when we will see her, but I guess not anytime soon.

-But I know for a fact, you will be more beautiful.

-You think so? She looked in my eyes, our bodies still close, she kissed me passionately, what did I do to have you?” She caressed my face, we kissed again. “Hold on, I brought Matteo’s guitar with me.

-Do you know how to play on it?

-No, but I know you do, you will teach me. You used to play with Matteo. Marie, Sam, Dilan and I would always follow you to the woods near our town. She gave me the guitar and a cute smile.

-You did? Guess we were like famous musicians. Well, I’ll teach you. She sat in front of me.

Where are you sitting dummy, get back here.

-Are you sure? Would it be easy for you?

-Easy? No. Better and makes me happier? Hell yes.”

She got back into my lap, and I taught her some of the notes on the guitar, I held her hand and tried to let her do a note, it worked.

After the guitar lesson, I set the bonfire, and we put marshmallow, Kate brought some chocolate and strawberries for the occasion. I played her some music. The atmosphere was perfect, the fire lightened the area, it also illuminated her beautiful face, but like drawing, guitar always took me to a different world, where I got anxious, where I remember everything that concerns me, the death of Marie, back when my father used to hit my mom, when mom left us, I felt anger, an explosive anger that grew with me since I was young. I was seeing red. Until, I felt a soft hand stopping me, it was Kate. She looked concerned. What it seems to me, that I have aggravated the music. It was ruled by anger. Pure fury. Suffocation, the kind of suffocation I buried in my heart for years, to stay strong, for me, for Marie, for Damian and Laurie, for my friends. All the repressed feelings, rushed back, they always did, but now they can explode.

“Calm down, I am here for you. Look at me.” She said calmly.

She sat on her knees and hugged me. “I will always be here, just let it all out.

- I don’t know how. I am drowning, help me. I need you. I am not strong, never been. I need to get myself back, but I don’t know how. I complained.

- Do whatever you have to do to unleash your anger.

- How?

- Like this. She stood up, ran to the forest’s entrance and started yelling, screaming if I was exact, then she came back to me. Come on, lets do it together.

- I am not sure. I said.

- Yes, you will. She grabbed my hand and led me to the forest.

She screamed again, I felt strange.

“Come on, try it! There is no one here, only if you care if the squirrels will wake up. She encouraged me.

I gathered all my strength, and together, we screamed all the negative feelings, I kept screaming until I felt like a heavy weight fell down my shoulders and my lungs hurt. I am pretty sure the forest creatures woke up.

As for Kate, she was just standing there and looking at me getting all that suffocating out of myself. I looked at her while panting.

“That helped, thank you.

-We are not done yet. She bit her lower lip.

-What do you have in mind?” I asked her.

She slowly started getting her dress and shoes off and turned to face the lake.

“Skinny dip, I dare you”, she winked me and ran to the lake.

She knew how to take me out of my mind. I took my clothes off and followed her into the lake.

“its freezing! How did you get in smoothly! I am shaking!

-That’s one of many of my hidden gifts, just feel the water, it will turn warm by time. Like your life path, give it time and believe me it will get better.” She came closer to me, hugged me, I constantly felt better. I hugged her waist. And here we are, under the moon light together, in a night of love, just her and me. We were kissing under the night sky, no one interrupting, the whole world was behind our backs, we fit perfectly together.

“When I am around you, I forget about everything.

-When did you figure you had feelings for me, Kate?

-During Christmas, when I was shopping and you were with Sophie. I was sure I had something for you. When you look at me, I felt like the most beautiful woman in the world, like I was enough, and what most interested me, its that you’re never afraid to show your love for me.

-I will always love you, even if the days sat us apart. I affirmed her.

I loved tangling her fingers with mine, kissing her sweet lips and touching her. I don’t know how else I could show her how much she meant to me.

We went out of the water, I was going to bring the towels from the campervan, but she didn’t let me.

“Lets get dry while looking at the stars.

-Are you sure of this? That’s insane.

-that’s the point. Doing something unexpected.

-You have a point.” She convinced me.

I stretched next to her, she was looking at the stars and I was looking at her, how her profile was made, her beautiful wet hair flowing on her glowing skin, how she took little breaths, how she moved her eyes counting the infinite stars.

“Look there! It is Canopus star! Did you see it? Like there!

-Yes I do, actually, I didn’t move my eyes from her. She was busy with the Clapopus Star or whatever it is, and I was busy watching her eyes sparkle with every move.

-They say, it is more massive than the sun, yet older. It’s the brightest star in its own galaxy and the second in our sky. Are you even listening to me? She looked at me.

-mmm, I am. I kept staring at her.

-But to me, it doesn’t seem so. She moved closer, and we kissed, again.

-I like you more than the stars in the sky.

-I know that. I do too. She whispered.

I wanted her. Body, heart, mind, soul.

I rolled up on top of her, put her arms up her head and started kissing her. She didn’t mind, she deepened the kiss.

“I want us to last, to be true. She whispered.

-I want that too, babygirl.

-You will be the death of me, Theo Garcia.”