Married To The Man Who Ruined Me

Chapter Four – The First Loss

Chapter Four – The First Loss

I wait until almost everyone has left before I step outside.

Not today. Not after last night. Not when everything I’ve worked for is dangling over the edge like a knife. I can’t hide anymore. I can’t pretend it’s not happening. I can’t run. I have to face it.

The sidewalk stretches under my shoes, clicking with every step, my heart hammering so loud I’m surprised no one hears it. People glance at me. Some curious, some disgusted, some already filming. I feel naked, stripped to the bone, and every eye feels like it’s piercing straight through me.

My phone buzzes. I pull it out.

An email from my academic advisor. The subject line already makes my stomach turn: Urgent – Academic Recommendation.

I open it.

The words hit like a punch.

“Due to recent events involving your conduct and the public scandal surrounding your name, your academic recommendation for internship placements has been formally withdrawn. Given the circumstances, the disciplinary board has deemed your actions as misconduct. You should consider yourself fortunate that further academic penalties, including potential rustication, are not being pursued at this time.”

I drop the phone. My chest caves in. Misconduct. Public scandal. Recommendation withdrawn. My name, my reputation, my chance at stepping into a future I fought tooth and nail for—gone.

Gone.

Gone.

My stomach flips. The bile rises. My knees feel weak. I grab the edge of the railing along the sidewalk, shaking. Misconduct. I didn’t do anything. I didn’t even touch the position I applied for. I had spent months preparing for this internship, months perfecting applications, meeting professors, researching companies, making sure I was qualified—more than qualified—and now it’s all wiped away with a few cold, official words.

And the recommendation wasn’t just some slip of paper. It was my ticket, my guarantee that someone would see my effort, my dedication, and believe in me. The letter I needed to secure the placement at that prestigious company—the one I’d dreamed about—was destroyed before it could even reach their hands.

I can’t breathe. I stumble down the steps, gripping the railing like it’s the only thing keeping me from falling into myself. Rage coils hot in my chest. My fists clench.The world feels too loud. Too bright. Too cruel.

And then I see him.

Reid Ashcroft.

Leaning against the lamppost outside my building. Calm. Untouchable. Menacing in that impossibly perfect way he always is. My blood boils. My hands clench into fists so tight my nails dig into my palms. My lungs ache from the fury swelling inside me.

“Reid…” My voice shakes. I want to disappear. I want to scream. I want to run, I want to hit him, I want him to feel even a fraction of what I’m feeling.

He steps forward, slow, deliberate. “Zahra.”

I flare, rage spilling like wildfire. “What the hell are you doing here?” My voice rises, sharp and raw.

He opens his mouth, and I cut him off before he can speak. “Don’t. Don’t even start. You’ve ruined everything! My internship—gone! My recommendation—withdrawn! My future—my name—all of it is public property because of you!”

I can see people slowing down, phones lifting, whispering. I don’t care. Let them watch. Let them see the woman the headlines called a mistress, the girl whose life has been ripped apart in one night.

“I wake up to find my academic recommendation—the one that would’ve gotten me into the company I’ve worked for months to impress—is gone!” I scream, voice cracking. “Do you understand? Gone! And for what? Some lie, some manipulation? My life? My hard work?”

Tears sting my eyes, but I refuse to let them fall. I can’t give him that. I can’t let him see how completely he’s destroyed me.

He tries, softly, carefully, “I didn’t—”

“You didn’t what? Stop it?” I shout. “Protect me? Care about me?” Rage burns hotter than anything I’ve felt before. “You just watched! You just watched! You let it happen while standing there, perfectly calm, like it wasn’t even real! Like I’m not even human!”

My chest heaves. I can feel my heart beating in my throat. Every step I took toward that internship, every late night preparing, every extra effort—it’s all meaningless. Misconduct. Public scandal. Destroyed.

He raises his hands, controlled, calm. “I never touched—”

I scream. “Get out of my life!”

Somebody is filming. People are stopping. Whispers, giggles, cameras. But I don’t care. I can’t care. My hands shake violently, fists curled around my bag, my keys, the last thread of control I have.

He steps closer. I step back. My heel slips on the curb. Heart hammering like it wants to escape my chest. The rage hasn’t even reached the part of me that feels like crying yet. That will come later, when I’m alone.

“I hate you!” I spit, trembling. “I hate you! I hate everything you’ve touched!”

He doesn’t respond. He doesn’t need to. Standing there, unmoved, calm, makes me angrier. Makes the blood in my veins turn to fire.

I slam my keys into the lock, nearly throwing myself inside. My hands shake so violently I can barely turn the key. Pulse so loud I can hear it in my ears.

And then… someone else. Watching.

I freeze.

Across the street, partially hidden in the shadows, a figure stands perfectly still. Phone in hand. Eyes locked on me.

Panic slices through the rage. A new fear rises. Danger. Exposure. Another layer of the nightmare.

Reid notices, his gaze sharpens. For the first time, I see tension in him. Awareness. Something changes in the air.

Everything else—the crowd, the whispers, the cameras—fades.

I’m not just ruined.

I’m being watched. And I don’t know by whom.

I clutch my keys like a lifeline, finally slipping inside. But I can’t shake it. That feeling, the heat of someone’s gaze on me. Something has begun.

Something bigger.

And I know one thing, sharp and clear:

Nothing… will ever… be the same