NOW THAT I HATE YOU LESS

CHAPTER 5: NOW THAT I HATE YOU LESS.

The urge to see her the next morning was unbearable.

I told myself it was just to make sure she was okay, but even I didn't believe that.

I drove past her apartment thrice before I gathered the courage to finally park. Her building looked quiet, isolated, but welcoming. For a moment, I thought maybe she left town. Until I eventually saw her sitting on the steps outside.

She tied her hair up into a messy bun, the messiest I've ever seen. She had no makeup on, wasn't smiling, just a book and a plate of dessert. When her eyes met mine, I expected a negative reaction. Instead, age smiled warmly, though it was obvious that she forced it.

I walked over, both hands in my pockets.

"Hey."

"Hey." Her voice was hoarse.

I sat beside her, close enough to feel the heat from her body, far enough not to touch her.

"You got the apology?" I asked.

"Yeah, doesn't change anything though."

"It does, at least for a start."

For a moment, we just sat there. I'm not good at comforting someone without swearing or threatening bodily harm. But for her, I'll try.

"If he comes near you again, I'll break more than his nose." That finally got her to look at me and talk, the exact result I wanted.

"Wait, you did that"? I ignore her. All of a sudden, she bursts out laughing. It was the first time I had seen her laugh so much.

"I've never seen that," I said.

"Seen what?" Seen you laugh this hard.

She smiled, "It's my first time getting to experience this warm side of you".

I nod, "You've always been mean and rude and..." She gives me a weak punch and we both laugh.

"Nancy?"

"Yeah..."

"I don't want to be that rude guy, I don't want to be that guy that only annoys you."

Her expression shifted. Not a frown, not a smile.

"You're not that guy, Ric. Not anymore."

“You’re still my Clumsy Nancy, though,” I say, and she laughs.

Her laughter faded, but the light in her eyes lingered. “I hate that I’m this vulnerable, I hate that he can still hurt me, Ric,” she told me. “I want to be strong and act like this is a piece of cake. I hate that I can’t. I hate that I’m not as strong as I pretend to be.”

Her eyes lit up again. “Why do you call me that?”

“Clumsy Nancy?”

She nods.

I smile before answering. “Remember the first day we reunited?” I asked her.

“You remember me?” She asked fiercely

“I do, I could never forget you”.

“Why did you pretend not to know me then? That’s the reason I’ve hated you”.

“You’re mad I forgot you when you don’t even remember our past in detail.” I turned to stare at her, she was already staring.

“You told me never to talk to you again, you made me promise I’ll act like I don’t know you if we ever crossed paths.”

Unexpectedly, she burst into laughter. “Dude, we were just kids.”

“I know, but it was a promise, and the only way I could honor it was by not trying to be your friend.”

“I take it back. But it feels good to know you never forgot me.”

“How could I forget when the traces are always there? You used to fall a lot back then, too.” She punched me weakly, and we both laughed.

The night air was cool, her shoulder brushed mine, and it made it warm. The streetlights made her face look golden. I swear I’d never seen anything prettier.

There was an awkward silence that followed before she broke it.

“There was one more promise.”

“Which?” I ask.

“You promised we’d get married.” She laughed lightly.

“I didn’t forget,” I said with a smile. “But let’s start here first.” I lean forward and give her a five-second kiss. I expected a slap or something worse after I pulled away, but instead, she grabbed my collar and pulled me closer, kissing me like she had been holding it all in for years.

The kiss deepened, got messy and was nicely aggressive. Her hands found a way into my shirt. And every argument we ever had, every eye roll, every sarcastic word we ever exchanged, melted in that moment.

She pulled away for a second, gasping, but her forehead still pressed mine.

“Ric,” she whispered. “This is dangerous, we shouldn’t be doing this.”

“I know Clums.” My thumb brushed the corner of her lips. “Tell me to stop and I will.”

She hesitated but she didn’t go. Then suddenly, she took my hands and placed them on her breast. I could swear that no bread recipe, invented and yet-to-be invented, could ever be as soft as this perfect pair. The bad boy in me wanted to strip her off her clothes right there and then, but instead, I caressed them with the shirt, feeling her hard, pointed n*****s. It was doing something to my little man down there. I held her face and kissed her harder, her body slowly moving into mine.

And God, I couldn’t get enough.

I opened my eyes to watch her in the moment, but again, she was already staring deep into my soul.

She pulled away. “I don’t know how long I waited for this day.”

“I told you I’d wait and I did”. I confessed.

“Never been with anyone?” She asked

“No one.”

“What about you? I know you’ve been auditioning,” I teased her.

She laughed, “Don’t start.”

“No auditions worth keeping.” She bit her lower lip, suddenly shy.

“Why didn’t you see anyone? You’ve missed out on some of the fun things of….

I place my finger on her perfect lips. “I’ve missed out on nothing. And in a world with you in it, I couldn’t go searching for someone else.”

Her eyes widened, maybe shock, maybe relief. For the first time, my sharp-tongued, quick-witted, 5’5 Nancy was speechless.

“You’re going to make me cry,” she said.

“I haven’t even taken off my belt.” I teased.

“Let’s go to my room, I need a real good cry. Now that I hate you less.”