20: Truth
882 Words
“Max, I... have something very important to tell you. It has long been due, has long been kept to a vault, hidden from you, so you would not freak out and discard me as soon as you learn about it” Brian muttered in a weak tone.
As the initial sentence from the boy progressed, Maxien for even more and more confused and puzzles as to what he meant by that.
In a moment, their table turned silent, and it wrapped around their cold bodies, making the girl unknowingly shiver in anxiousness when he noticed how Brian stopped, contemplating whether to spill it and tell Maxien, or divert the topic to something else that would not require him to expose himself.
The silence was too loud, yet comfortable at the same time, at least for Maxien. It felt as if everyone else around them has suddenly disappeared from the place, and then, they were the only one who were left alone, now free to coverese and release their frustrations and complaints as loud as they could manage, as shameless as their could possiblt be. Because with Brian, she could always be true to herself.
And then, after the silence, Maxien never expected for the storm to come and leave ruins of a shattered sanctuary, for the strongest blow to hit her like a fastly approaching dump truck.
“Just.... say it?” Maxien giggled awkwardly as she encouraged the boy to resume speaking. “I would not mind ”
“I... Max, I already found my soulmate. The real one, the one I share my birthmark with. I am so sorry...”
Now, he found...
What? Who? What the hell did that even suppose to mean? Or has Brian just worded the initiative the wrong way? He could not be kidding now.
“Pardon?” Maxien asked in disbelief and confusion, “Are you high or something right now? Bry, it has been years ever since the first time we met?”
“Max, that is exactly what I was to tell you about. I... lied, and I kept on lying to you, I have been playing with your feelings since then. I... I have known you for long, Max, since high school, that is, before I had the courage to approach and befriend you during the beginning of college, when I found a chance to do so. Max, I am very, very sorry, for deceiving you all this time. I know very well that a sorry would never make it to redeem myself after this, but I just can not... I can not hold it in much longer anymore, I could not continue to lie to you and pretend. The... guilt is eating me alive, Max, it's about to overpower me, and it will only take a while before it fully consumes me. Before that happens, I am letting it go and telling m you. Max, I was able to do something that sinister and horrendous... because I was obsessed. I used to be obsessed with you!”
“Bry? I don't... get what you mean? I could not seem to... understand—”
“I lied! I am not your soulmate! I... my birthmark... this is not real, but a tattoo I got when I turned eighteen, especially designed to match tours. Max... I am a terrible person, I am obsessive, I am horrifying, I deserve nothing after deceiving you for years. I keep on... acting very defensive and possessive when it comes to you and that is because I have long been aware that I am not your real soulmate, that someone could actually steal you away— that someone might be the one who is destined for you and I would not stand a chance, I will be left alone like I always have.”
“Max, Max, listen. I am not the guy you loved,” for the first time in forever, Maxien has seen a trace of liquid falling off Brian's face, trailing down his cheeks and dropping by his lap. He was crying. For her. He was apologizing, he was being honest. “Max, I am not your soulmate, never will be.”
Maxien could not believe her ears, could now believe what she just heard, and what she was seeing.
No way... she told herself. There should be no freaking way that Brian was not playing with her right now, no? There's just no f*cking way...
“Did you... even love me all these years, Bryan? Or was it just... the thought of having me like a trophy?”
“I... did! I can at least proudly say that I definitely did, Max. You could never question my genuine feelings in all these years— please do not ever do that. But, I really don't know. I am not sure if it is really love or just the idea of having you for myself. I was selfish and obsessed, Max. I might have snatched your chances to meet your real soulmate and be with them. Max, sorry... I'm very, very sorry.”
With those last words, Brian stood up and, without further ado, left Maxien in their table, lost in her thoughts, and with tears of disbelief starting to stream down her face.
- Writer
