Memories of a Life Shared

Chapter 6 Tanner

He was scared, he opened his eyes and didn’t recognize anything. He had seen the top of Noana’s head laying across his lap, he could hear her faint sniffles and had no idea why she was crying. He placed a very heavy hand on her head to comfort her. She slowly looked at him, her eyes puffy and she had no makeup on. Her eyes got bigger than he had ever seen before and she started to yell. He was very confused, she was running out the door yelling he was awake, of course he was.

She ran back to him and grabbed his hand. He was still confused but she asked him if he could understand her, he blinked like she asked him too.

“Tanner, you were in an accident, you are in the hospital.” She told him as she started to cry again. He tried to grip her hand a little tighter but all the strength was gone. She smoothed his hair back and he felt her hot tears land on his forearm. He wanted her to stop crying, he wanted to comfort her but je also wanted to know why he was in the hospital and why he was so weak.

A doctor he had never seen before come into the room and told him he hadn’t been expected to wake up. Was he not just sleeping? Was he really supposed to be dead? His heart started to race when they told him they were going to remove things from his body, were these machines keeping him alive? Was he going to die when they turned off his oxygen?

He did as the doctor told him, the tube coming out of her throat hurt like nothing he had ever felt before; he wanted to cry but he wouldn’t. His throat was dry and felt like it was sticking to itself. He coughed a few more times and rested his head on his pillow. Noana had come over and held his hand again, it calmed him down and he felt okay.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered to her.

“Shush, its okay baby. Just focus on getting better. I’m right here for you. I’m not leaving, not ever.” She said as a small tear fell from her eye, after that she let no more tears fall. She told him to get some rest and he obeyed, he was exhausted even though he had been sleeping for the last fourteen days.

Tanner’s dreams haunted him that evening, dreams of dying and leaving Noana all alone. Dreams of him waking back up and Noana deciding that she couldn’t be with him any more. He didn’t want to say anything to anyone yesterday but when he was laying there he couldn’t feel his legs, he couldn’t really feel anything below his waist.

He opened his eyes and looked around, the only oxygen he was currently on was a nose cannula and he was ready for that to be off too. Noana was asleep in the chair beside of him and Tazer was on the floor in the corner, he couldn’t tell if he was asleep or not. He saw a tray beside of him with a glass of water on it. He slowly put his hand in the cup and pulled out a small cube of ice and tried to toss it at Tazer. It hit the floor a foot in front of him but he had heard the small clack it made on the floor. He looked up and smiled.

Tazer stood up and walked over to him on the opposite side of Noana. “Morning buddy.” He whispered trying not to wake his sister.

“Taze, I want to sit up.” He said blindly searching for the bed buttons.

“The nurse is due to come in any minute, can you wait for her?”

“Yeah. Taze, how did I get here? What happened? I don’t remember anything.”

“What’s the last thing you remember?”

“Mrs. Jones yelling at me for kissing Noana in the hallway on Friday just after last bell. I told her I wasn’t able to see her this weekend because it was supposed to be forced family fun.” Tanner explained. By the look on Tazer’s face he had lost a lot of important in the last couple days. He wasnt even sure how long he had been here.

“Noana should be the one to tell you everything but you wrecked your four wheeler.”

“How bad is my bike?”

“It’s totalled bub, but don’t worry about it. The important thing is you are here, you are alive.”

“So ive been told, I wish I could remember at least a little bit. You said the accident happened when?”

“It happened on Sunday.” Taze scratched his head.

“I don’t remember anything from Saturday on then. I remember late Friday afternoon then nothing.”

Tazer opened his mouth to say something but got interrupted by a nurse walking into the room.

“Mr. Mac, how are we feeling today?” she asked as she changed an IV bag and pushed some buttons on a monitor that he had no idea what it did.

“From what I’m told, I’ve been better. Can you help me sit this bed up?” He smiled his normal multi-watt smile at her. She showed him how to use the buttons on his bed and say him up. He felt a little dizzy so he closed his eyes and held his breath.

“Tanner, are you okay?” the nurse asked. He nodded his head, the urge to vomit was getting less.

“Just a little dizzy, that’s all. It’s getting better.”

“If you get dizzy anymore or it gets worse press the call button.” She smiled at him and turned to leave. “Dr Shama will be in to take a look at you in a few.”

Tanner opened his eyes and smiled at the face only inches from his. He grabbed the sides of her face and kissed her lips sweetly.

“Hi.” He said.

“Hi. How did you sleep?” she asked and let him kiss her again.

“Okay, coulda been better had I been able to cuddle you all night.” He smiled at her.

“Gag, im gonna be sick.” Tazer said making a gag face. “I’m gonna head home and get a shower and maybe a nap. I’ll be back at dinner.” Smacked Tanner on the shoulder lightly and walked away.

“How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine. Are you hungry? Go get something to eat. I promise I will be a good boy while you are gone.”

She agreed after he begged her to take care of herself, he hoped the doctor came in while she was gone. He needed answers to his worries.

Just like he had hoped the doctor came in not more than five minutes after Noana had left.

“Tanner, how are you feeling? The nurse said you got dizzy when you sat up. How is that? Still dizzy?”

“No. It went away after a few minutes of being up right.”

“perfect. I’m gonna do some physical tests on you right now. I want you to let me know when you can’t do something. Hold up ten fingers and drop them one by one.” Tanner did as he said, that one was easy.

“Now I want you to wiggle your left toes.” Tanner assumed he had done what was said. “Now the right.” Tanner tried.

The doctor went to a drawer in the room and pulled out what looked like a chopstick. He lifted up the blanket that was covering Tanner’s feet.

klCan you feel any of this?” the doctor asked. Tanner had no idea what he was even doing.

“No.”

“Now?”

“No. I’m paralyzed aren’t I?”

“I’m not calling it that just yet. You could regain the feeling in your feet.”

“Doc. I can’t feel anything below my waist.” He said in a quiet panic.

“I’m still not calling it that until I know more. We will run some more tests. For now we will get you set up with a wheel chair consult and in a couple weeks once I know you have no more swelling to your brain or spine I will set you up with physical therapy.” The doctor shook his hand and walked out the door.

For the first time in a long time Tanner prayed, he really didn’t know how to do it but he remembered all the times Noana had prayer for him out loud so he copied what he remembered.