THE PATH OF THE UNKNOWN

THE DREAM & THE MARK

In the corner of my attic room, seeing things are never been this clear (or so I imagined). To me, this corner is just like me - ordinary, messy, pointless. But tonight it bears something different. Something extraordinary, something that I never thought will be a part of me, something that is far from reality.

At this moment, sitting here feels like home. I can see the every corner of this room that has become my shell. This room gives me all the comfort I need despite its awful and messy appearance. It shielded me from the pain and hurt that this life is throwing at me. It covers me whenever I shed tears from all the humilitiation and disgrace the humanity is giving me. This attic is not just a room for me. This attic is my aegis, my cover, my protection and my sanity.

At some point tonight, I've been feeling that I wasn't dreaming at all. As I sit in the attic corner, my reflection bounces back from the full size mirror in front of me. Though I wasn't sure if I'm seeing myself clearly. A vivid image was there, sitting just like me but there's something different from her, until I noticed it.

The mark on her neck was glowing. I have never seen it so clear before. But now, with all the darkness inside my attic room, with the full moon up in the dark silent night, her mark - my neck mark, so visible and clearer than before seems to be like alive!

It glows with a streak of blue and gold light. I was deeply amazed on the way it looks not until I feel a sudden heat through me. The sensation was so strong that it pierce within my flesh. Eating every piece, conquering my human body. I felt like screaming but I am not sure if I already I did or this is just a part of my extraordinary dream.

I begin to catch my breathe. Slowly having realization on what's happening. I try to relax and calm myself, thinking that all was just a dream (though I wasn't sure about that), I closed eyes and take deep breathes and the piercing pain from my mark begins to vanish bit by bit. When I open my eyes, the reflection on the mirror seems to be a bit calm. The pain and fear from her eyes are no longer prominent though I am sure that she's scared. As I move forward, my reflection seems to be another person mimicking my every move. I shove away the thought that she's not me and I begin to focus to myself.

Looking close to my reflection is like a brand new scenario. I have changed for the past years. Lines are more visible on the side of my eyes. The scar parallel to my chin is way longer than I thought. And I have a full black eyeballs that all along I thought was dark chocolate.

Then my sight crawls down to my neck and for the first time, I have seen a clear image of the mark that I bear my whole life. This mark that is now glowing with such luminousity. The mark that I thought as ugly as me. The mark that I keep hidden in the eyes of everyone. The mark that feels so eminent to me now. The mark who has its own story.

"I wasn't dreaming", I said loudly. I know for sure that this can't be a dream. The mark on my neck is still glowing. It's funny and strange but the piercing sensation a while ago has begin to feel tingly. I start to stroke it and as I go over it, my eyes started to play tricks on me again.

I've seen a world different from what I know. A visual scenery flashes back and forth into my very eyes. This strange place seems like something that has been pulled out from a fantasy storybook. Something magical, something unknown and yet it feels like home to me.

The mark on my neck seems very familiar on what it is trying to tell me. This magical world is for sure connected to my mark. But why? How this can be? Am I really dreaming or this is actually a sign of insanity. So many questions, not a single answer to give and a big bowl of uncertainties. Whatever this mark and this dream is trying to tell me, I am so sure that it's too important to just leave it behind. For I've been dreaming the same things over and over every night. But only tonight that it is so clear that I can easily identify the shades of colors from this magical and unknown world. And only tonight in this dream that I hadn't feel so alone and strange.