Scene of Eve

[chapter 8] ; Canticle 1

❝Before I change again,

remind me of the time I still remembered.❞

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“We’re here.” I said matter of factly. 

“Here? 5-star, indeed.” She laughed as I parked in front of a diner that looked like it came out of the 50s. 

For me, at least, it’s 5-star worth. Most of the food chains along the road are serving the usual. Greasy burger and fries. Pasta that looks like play-dough. Chicken that looks like s**t and the meat is like sand. I guess that’s the quality you get for dining in fast food.

“We could’ve eaten at Mcdonald's.” Lizel whispered across the table after the waitress poured water in our glasses and rudely dropped the menu in front of us.

“Ring the bell when you want to order.” The waitress popped her gum, eyes rolling in annoyance, before rolling away on her skates.

“Does Mcdonald’s have these bells? Or waitresses on skates?” I laugh and tilt my chin towards the waitress back at the counter, filing her nails and popping her gum again.

“No. But-”

“Does Mcdonald’s have blueberry cheesecake?” I wiggle my eyebrows mischievously, knowing I’ve won.

Lizel giggles and shakes her head at me as I tap on the bell. The same waitress came rolling back to us, a small clipboard in hand and a pen.

“Two plates of spaghetti and the house burger with fries on the side. And-” 

“Dessert?” “dessert-”

Lizel hid her fitful giggles, facing the wall, as the waitress made a face at me.

“Blueberry cheesecake, please. Thank you.” I stammered the words out as the waitress stared at me for a minute before writing down our orders and rolling away once again.

“Whoa. Rude much?” Lizel said as she stared at the waitress talking to someone in the kitchen. Probably our orders. Then I spotted her, just at the same time Lizel did, as she stuck her gum under the counter as she sat back down and brought out nail polish.

“Gross.” Lizel brought her tongue out and made gagging noises at what happened.

“What did I say. 5-star.” I laughed and applauded as if I was watching an opera.

Our meal arrived. It’s not exactly 5-star worth, of course. Who would give 5-stars on a spaghetti that looks like tomato noodles with crushed meat(balls)? The burger might not be greasy like how most of the other fast-food chains lining the almost empty dirt road. But it’s beaten to a pulp. You won’t see the patty because it’s hidden between the large lettuce and thick block of cheese. You won’t even taste the patty the first two bites. Instead, you only bite the crunch of the lettuce and get mayonnaise, ketchup, or mustard, smeared on your chin. Might even drip down your clothes if you’re a sloppy eater. Or if you’re just really an unlucky piece of s**t.

I just found this place one evening. 

[flashback]

I was idly riding back home on my motorcycle and decided to just drop everything and took an unplanned tour just outside of the city. Instead of doing my academic papers due in a few days, I instead ran away like I always do. What’s the use even? Do you get stressed over deadlines when there’s a world out there that you can explore to your heart's content? And exploring was what I did.

My motorcycle brought me to a long dirt road leading….well. I don’t exactly know where. That’s for me to know, I guess. If I die, I blame my motorcycle for bringing me here. At least I had one last adventure before I died. 

I passed by a number of small cafes and restaurants. There were also the occasional Mcdonald’s and Wendy’s scattered kilometers apart. Some abandoned warehouses as well. And of course, gas stations. 

But one gas station caught my attention. It wasn’t lit like the others and it looks abandoned. And there was nothing else besides it. I decided to take a look around. No people to bother nor distract me. Just silence. Well, not exactly complete silence since I hear cicadas. And not entirely alone because I just had to swat a fly after parking my motorcycle across the gas station. 

I am now standing under the gas station’s roof. Nothing special about it. Just that there are a lot of spider webs everywhere. But before I even took a step back towards my bike, I heard a scream from the comfort room. Was it my imagination playing? Probably. I’m not exactly sane. I do hear voices in my head once in a while. Which is why I’d rather be alone. At least I know that the voices are no one else’s. I won’t have the urge to hate people because the voices are just in my head. And I may not be sane but at least I know that I’m not. I don’t need f****d up professionals in white coats spewing the obvious at my face. I don’t need to force anything down my throat. I’m doing fine.

A scream. That’s definitely not coming from my head. 

“Get off me, you bastard!”Walking closer towards the comfort room, I saw another motorcycle parked behind the gas station, hidden behind the tall grass. 

I choked on a laugh as I saw the scene. 

A girl, probably around my age, was beating up a guy. She sat on his stomach as she aimed her tiny fists down his face. It wasn’t strong enough to call it a bloodbath, but the guy could not even stand nor move. He was stuck with his arms covering his face protectively. 

Although the girl had the upper hand now, it seems like she had to put up a fight just to be in her position right now. She had a busted lip. Tears in her eyes. Her hair tangled in places. And...is that a bruise forming on her cheek?

“Hey, whoa. Stop. Stop! He’s-” I tried pulling the girl to stand but she wouldn’t budge. Every time I tried to tug her away, she would tightly grab the boy’s gray hoodie, strangling him in the process. I don’t exactly know what happened, but at this rate, there could be murder.

“He’s a bastard, that’s what!” The girl huffed, letting go of the boy as she let me help her up.

The boy looked high on something as he was wobbly on his feet when he stood up. His hands instantly found support on the sink. His eyes were unfocused too as he looked around. It was like he was seeing where he was for the first time. As his eyes landed on the girl standing in front of me, he started reaching out to her. I noticed the girl shaking and flinched as the boys’ fingers started to grip her wrist. 

Pulling the girl behind my back, I pushed the boy away. He tumbled against the sink, the back of his head hitting the wall before completely fainting on the floor. I was about to check if he had any injury but the girl tugged on my shirt.

“He’s knocked out. He’ll be fine. Can we leave, please?” Her voice was close to a whisper as her eyes looked at the boy, as if she was afraid to wake him.I let her drag me out of the comfort room.

She ran to the hidden motorcycle immediately and I was stuck at the door, unsure if I should leave the boy or not. But another scream from the girl made me run to her.

“Are you hurt? What’s wrong?” I turned her to face me as I tried looking for any visible wound or blood. But nothing, except for the really busted lip and yep the bruise that’s darker than it was before.

“No. f**k. The keys are with him.” She was shaking harder than before and her legs gave away how tired - or scared? - she was as she was suddenly crouched on the floor, her head on her knees as she started crying. 

I was lost. I didn’t know what to do.

“I could go back in and find-” I was already walking back towards the comfort room when she suddenly stood up, her back facing me, and wiped her eyes with her sleeves.

“Can I hitch a ride with you? At least until I can find a new ride?” She said in between hiccups before facing me.

“I- Yeah. I guess. Sure. But I don’t have extra help-” Scratching the back of my head with the awkwardness I’m feeling, she cut me off as she got the spare helmet hanging on to the handle of the motorbike.

“Let’s go.” She walked past me towards my own motorcycle as she fixed her helmet on. I followed after staring idly at the boys’ motorcycle before turning back around my motorcycle. 

___

The ride was quiet, except for her occasional sniffing. 

I wanted to ask where she wanted to be dropped off, but we already passed a ton of places with people she could hitch with but she made no move to tell me that she wanted to get down. Instead, her fingers gripped the side of my jean jacket tighter. 

My stomach was rumbling. I haven’t eaten ever since I started this little adventure of mine. And now that the stars are shining, I’m reminded that I’m no immortal and I need to feed myself - and the girl. 

I parked at a brightly lit diner that looked like it came out of the 50s. But even as I started unbuckling my helmet, the girl made no move to loosen her hold on my jacket, thus both of us still sat on my motorbike awkwardly, staring in different directions. 

“Hey,  uhm-” I tried to call her attention as her eyes seem to be unfocused. She doesn’t seem high though like the boy she was with. But of course. She’s obviously still shaken by what happened. Of course. How can I forget? 

A chuckle. She chuckled. And I want to bury myself. My stomach started to make rumbling noises and instead of my voice, it was that noise that called the girls’ attention to me. At least that got her letting go of her vise grip on my clothes. She then instantly jumped down upon the realization that we’ve been staring at each other for far too long. 

“I hope you don’t mind. But this was the closest I could. I mean-” I started to ramble, my hands moving here and there frantically while I tried to find the reason why we stopped here.

“You’re hungry. I get it. I am too. So?” She placed her helmet on my bikes’ grip, besides my own, as she made her way inside The Ark Diner.  It wasn’t fully inside. Just a couple sucking faces by the counter and an old lady with a kid by the window. Just a table away, the girl was already sitting down, her eyes roaming around the whole place. When her eyes landed on mine, she waved at me and pointed at the chair across from her. I didn’t hear someone behind me so I was caught off guard when someone literally sped past through me.

It was a waiter on skates. Turns out, the girl was waving for him and not me. As the waiter stopped beside the girl, he gave her the menu and glared at me as I sat across from her. 

“Uh, excuse me?” I raised my eyebrows at him, hand extended and reaching for the other menu. Without sparing me another glance, the waiter dropped the menu in front of me as he stayed beside the girl.

“Any suggestions?” The girl stared at me, half her face covered by the menu and only her eyes were visible. Was she taunting me? Flirting? I can’t exactly say. I couldn’t hear if the smile behind the menu was flirtatious or just a curious one. 

“I don’t-” The waiter interrupted me as he took my menu and pointed at some of the images and the page where their ‘best sellers’ were. The girl smiled up at him as she put the menu down, her eyes forming crescent moons as she listened attentively to what the waiter was saying.

“Alright. My boyfriend and I will have that then.” She gently kicked me under the table to get my attention away from burning holes at the kid playing airplanes just behind her. 

“Right. Of course. Order will be up in 15 minutes or so. Ok waiting?” Finally, the waiter looked at me with a glum smile.

I didn’t bother answering as the waiter turned his attention back to the girl after seeing my ‘ok’ sign.

“Boyfriend?” I asked as the waiter skated away to the kitchen.

“Yup,” The girl answered, a popping sound on the ‘p’. “He was obviously flirting. Not ready to get back into action after tonight. Maybe in a week or two, I’d let him rail me right here. She added as she rested both of her hands on the tabletop. 

“You’ll be ok?” I asked after taking a deep breath, hoping it’s the right time to ask.

The girl pats her body and looks at her arms and hands before nodding my way.

“I mean, you’ll be able to get back home or- Well. Wherever you need to go?”

Again, just a nod and a smile. But her eyes seem glassy. But I couldn’t really see as her eyes started to look around the place before landing on the couple who, after sucking faces, are now whispering and giggling.

The food arrives an hour after. Or at least my food arrives an hour after. The girl, Lizel, as she quietly said her name before taking a bite of her burger, just had to wait for exactly fifteen minutes for her food. I didn’t bother to even thank the waiter as he skated towards our table with my food. Too hungry to even bother, I just dug in. The spaghetti was like tomato noodles - is that even a thing? - with the sauce already as watery as soup. 

“Is this some Japanese noodles, or-?” I lifted a forkful of noodles as Lizel tried to mask her laughs with coughs.

“Ramen, you mean? And hey. You brought me here. I thought you knew what you were getting into.” She ate the last chunk of her burger as she licked at her fingers before wiping her lips with them.

“A retro diner. But turns out this is some Japanese diner, then.” I shook my head in disapproval as I slurped the rest of the pasta, leaving only a half uneaten meatball. 

“A Japanese diner with some bomb desserts.” Lizel was smiling as she was looking at the menu once again before waiving for her flirtatious waiter. She asked for a slice of blueberry cheesecake before tapping the table to ask if I wanted some. I shook my head ‘no’, and that was it. As I was chomping down on my burger, she got busy picking out the blueberry pieces on the cake and setting them aside. 

“Saving them for later?” I asked.

“Nope,” again another popping sound on her ‘p’. “I don’t like blueberries.”

“Then why did you order a blueberry cheesecake?” I asked with my eyebrows raised and my eyes on the poor blueberries that she disregarded on a tissue paper beside her plate.

“I like the cheese and the blueberry syrup?” She replied after taking a huge bite of the cake.

As Lizel ate the rest of her cake, I stood and went to the counter to pay. While waiting for the cashier lady to complete our order, I looked outside for any other possible ride Lizel could take. But the only cars I see are a black Volkswagen and a maroon Mazda, which I assume, are owned by the couple and the old lady with a kid. With my change already in my wallet, I decided to wait for Lizel outside. I also needed a smoke after everything. My supposed peaceful random drive took an unexpected turn and left a memory that would play in my mind for days. 

_

“So,” Lizel came out moments after while I was on my second stick. “I didn’t get your name.” She took slow strides towards me as I took one deep inhale of the cigarette before puffing it out the other way.

“Ian Miller. Or just Ian.” I offered my hand that was not holding the cigarette.

“Ian.” Instead of taking my outstretched hand, she reached for my cigarette and lighted her own with it.

A few inhales and puffs of smoke were exchanged and some not so discreet glances. Seeing Lizel clearly now, ignoring the bruised cheek and busted lip that is, she’s beautiful. It was a good thing then I didn’t look at her much when we ate or I would have probably burnt a hole on her forehead for staring. 

She probably felt me glancing more than before as she barely lifted her head. 

“I know my face is f****d up,” She whispered before taking another drag of her smoke. “It was why the waiter always glared at you. Probably thought you were the one who did this.” She laughed as her foot kicked some pebbles on the ground. It may just be my hearing playing tricks on me but her voice was shaky for a moment and her stance was almost like she wanted to curl in on herself right there and then. Her arms hugged herself, the confidence she had before slowly fading as her shell slowly envelopes her.

I didn’t know what to say. I’m not good at comforting. Never had to comfort someone, to be honest. I don’t know what words to say. I don’t know the kind of affection I should give. I don’t know how big of a space is needed. Because I just run and run when I’m in the same situation. I run instead of getting comfort. Running is the only comfort I know. So I offer Lizel what I know. 

“Huh?” She looked at my outstretched hand towards her as I gave her a helmet. “Right. I said I was gonna look for a new ride. Well, nice meeting you, ‘just’ Ian.” She turned and walked towards the dirt road, waiting for any car to come.

I kicked my motorcycle to life and drove the short distance from where I was parked towards Lizel. 

“Get on.” I said as I adjusted my helmet. She made no move, still stunned in place. So it was either I left her stunned with the waiter looking out the door at us, or I pull her towards my bike. I chose the latter as I don’t want to leave her with the assuming waiter. Once I leave, the only way out for her would be the eating-faces couple or the old woman and kid - who is currently puking. 

“Unless you wanna ride in a puke-smelling car. Or maybe you wanna do some threesome with-” I wasn’t able to even get to the end of my sentence as Lizel pushed me forward as she found a comfortable position behind me on my motorcycle. Her hands, like before, were clutching my shoulders. I would’ve asked her to wrap her arms instead of on my waist but I’d rather not risk it after what happened. So like before, I started my motorcycle and moved at a quieter pace than I would want to.

“Now you’re just making me regret riding with you. The grandma would have driven this thing way better than you.” Lizel groaned behind me as her hands loosened on my shoulders. I wasn’t exactly annoyed - okay, actually I am. - but it seems like she was telling me I can go at my own pace. So without wasting any other second, I revved my motorcycle up, bending forward a little as I twisted the throttle a couple of times. It was at this moment that I felt her hands sliding down my back and wrapping around my torso securely. I chuckled at that as I felt a weight on my back, her head finding the proper angle to lay on.

Even with the roar of my motorcycle nearly drowning every other sound, it was impossible not to hear Lizel sniffling behind, her hold on me loosening and tightening once in a while as she tries to calm herself down.

“Just cry it out. The moon is nowhere. The stars are too far. My motorcycle is too loud for me to hear. Every other car and motorcycle just drives past us.”

And as I drove away under the moonless sky, her cries kept me company. 

[end flashback]

“I can’t believe we’re back here.” Lizel said as she munched on fry and looked around. 

“Looking for someone, perhaps?” I said as her eyes traveled back to mine.

“You really won’t let that go, will you?” She laughed as she started spooning the tomato sauce from the spaghetti - ramen, as Lizel referred to it before.

“No. How could I let that go when the food could be prepared in 15 minutes but came only after an hour? I was starving.” To prove my point, I took a big bite of my burger, ketchup, and mustard staining my lips and chin.

“Baby,” Lizel giggled as she wiped the stain off with her thumb and licked it off. “The moon is nowhere. The stars are too far. But there are other people here and they are staring at you.”

With a shrug and a smile, I took another bite of my burger, remembering that fateful night at an empty gas station.

Who knew something empty could give me something that makes me complete?