Before I Sleep

Chapter 7 This Can't Be Happening

Two long weeks I've been in bed. My dad, uncle and brother have been like helicopter parents the entire time. Today I felt better to walk. But I was hit with lots of nausea and couldn't hold down anything. I asked my brother to join me to a quick trip to Walgreens. Of course he came with me. We both walked in and I went to the aisle where they had the feminine products and next to them were pregnancy tests. I grabbed 4 different ones to make sure. My brother didn't bother saying anything. We all knew this was a possibility. Once we paid and we went home I rushed into my bathroom and took all 4 tests. I put my alarm on my phone for 2 minutes. I kept pacing in my room, once my phone rang I was dreading on checking the tests. But I needed to know. I walked in slowly and looked at the tests. They all said the same. It was positive. s**t, s**t ot can't be. I mean I knew this could be a huge chance but why. I dont know if I should keep it. I mean how can I explain how he or she was conceived? Will I love this child even though it wasn't from a loving moment or someone I knew? I needed to know my options so I grabbed my keys and left to the nearest planned parenthood. Once I got there the nurse had me wait for the next opening. I had to wait for about 30 minutes. After I was weighed and my vitals taken they withdrew some blood to take a pregnancy test. They nurse escorted me to a room and there i sat waiting for the doctor and my results. A bit after the doctor walked in. She was so nice. She had my results and confirmed what I already knew. I began to cry. I told her part of my story and asked if I knew my options. I told her no, so she went on to tell me what they were. Once I had all the information and given an ultrasound to see how far along I was. Once I saw a little pea just in my womb I couldn't think of getting rid of it. I wanted to protect it with all my might. Getting some prenatal vitamins I left and went home to talk to my dad. He was sitting in his recliner when I got home. I walked up to him and have him the photo. He looked at it then up to me with a shock expression. He didn't say anything. So I told him it was a picture or my little pea. I told him I couldn't get rid of it. And it wasn't his or hers fault. That i would raise it myself. Even though he didn't agree he said he would be there to support my decisions. I called my mom and told her the news she of course cried and argued with me and I ended up hanging up on her. I was pissed and hurt for everything she said and the names she called my innocent pea. I mean I get it but it wasn't its fault. I ended up taking my vitamins and warmed up some soup and made some toast. It was so far the only thing I was enjoying so much that sat well in my tummy. Going on my laptop I started looking for a job. College will have to wait. I haven't called Teresa or talked to her since that day. I had to block her and Bobby's number. They wouldn't stop calling. My uncle couldn't find anything about this Jason guy. He kept searching.