Bader

8: Last Part

When we arrived in Bader’s room, Hassan and Jafer sat side by side on the bed. I sat on the carpet in one corner. Bader removed his shirt, switched on the TV, took some white small tablets from his drawer, cracked one and gave one half each to Hassan and Jafer. They spoke in Arabic and laughed.

Turning to me he said, “That tablet is good, it will make you crazy for s*x” giving me a nasty smile. “One half for Hassan, one half for Jafer, and one half for you... Tarantado” He spoke like he was singing Arabic. He opened the refrigerator and took an energy drink, open its lid, took into his mouth the tablets, gulped them.

“Wait! Wait! Why did you take one and a half while each of us took only a half? And what is this for again?” I asked standing up as I held the half of tablet on my palm.

“Ingest it, dammit! No question is allowed here! It will not kill you, ok?” he said partly kidding. "And don't ask why I took one-and-a-half coz I can take even five whole tablets in one gulp!" as he tossed energy drinks to me, to Hassan and to Jafer.

"Really? Doesn't it harm you?" I said in astonishment.

"What harm are you saying? See my body, it's strong!" flexing his biceps, giving me a big grin.

"OK!" I nodded. So I gulped the tablet with the energy drink, my heart throbbed fast in anxiousness of what it could induce me. I sat back to the corner as Hassan and Jafer after ingesting their tablets continued to focus their eyes on the TV screen.

Bader took one music CD, played it in his mini-component, then took a VCD and played it on another player. He sat beside me, arching his left arm over my shoulders. While our eyes were focused on the TV screen, our ears listened to the soft music.

A few minutes and my lips dried up I kept biting and licking them with my tongue. Some parts of my muscles seemed to move involuntarily and my mind and body became active. I could feel an exhilarating sensation creeping all over my system. I heard my heart beat fast, my problems seemed to be gone and all I wanted was to feel the excitement, the company of Bader and his friends. The soft and soothing music, all made me feel like I was floating – in some kind of heaven.

I tried to focus my eyes on the screen. There was this guy seated in front of the bed where two men and a woman had s*x; his hands were strapped into the chair. On the bed, one of the guys lay flat while the woman sat on his hard on, the other guy entered her from her behind. I could hear their moans and see the swinging of their midsection, their faces looked exhilarated. The man strapped onto the seat could only lick his lips as he watched the s*x scene and struggled to let loose of himself.

As I was in that concentration, the song of the boy band “Backstreet Boys” was played –

Although loneliness has always been a friend of mine

I'm leavin' my life in your hands

People say I'm crazy and that I am blind

Risking it all in a glance…

Bader stood up, “I like the song...” held my hand to let me stand. As I stood in front of him, he took my hands, guided them around his waist and let them stay there while his hands were on my shoulders occasionally caressing my hair. I looked at Bader's face. He closed his eyes feeling the music and the sensation with me. We danced softly with the song –

And how you got me blind is still a mystery

I can't get you out of my head

Don't care what is written in your history

As long as you're here with me

I don't care who you are

Where you're from

What you did

As long as you love me

Who you are

Where you're from

Don't care what you did

As long as you love me

Every little thing that you have said and done

Feels like it's deep within me

Doesn't really matter if you're on the run

It seems like we're meant to be

I had heard that song many times before and in fact, I bought a tape on that. But at that time with Bader, it was like totally a different one and every word was just filled with meaning. I could feel Bader singing it and every word he articulated was meant for me, for the two of us. In that room, all I knew was that only he and I existed and I couldn’t help but be overjoyed beyond belief having to experience such a deep sense of self-assurance.

Then as the song continued to play, Bader whispered softly into my ears, "Mike, I love you… I always do. There is never any time or any day that passes by without me thinking about you. My world revolves around you, and I have always cherished the times when I am with you. How I wish that this moment never ends, that there is no tomorrow, or that nothing can come between us…"

"Yeah…" was all I could say as I run my hands up and down his back, trying to clench more deeply the touch of my fingers into his body enjoying the stimulation and the feeling of being next to him.

He kissed me on my hair, pressed me harder into him. I started to kiss his chest, licked his n*****s as he released a soft moan. He continued to caress my hair, my cheek, running his hands up and down my back softly, relishing every tingling sensation in our flesh. I was like dreaming if not in a trance filled with the overwhelming sensation. We stayed that way for about thirty minutes, even after that song had ended.

When I glanced at Hassan and Jafer still sitting on the edge of the bed, they were kissing and hugging. After a while, Hassan removed his shirt, stood up and pulled Jafer to stand up. Jafer had removed his shirt too. Like us, they were in trance-like dancing to the soft music, hugging caressing, kissing. Later, Bader removed my shirt which I readily obliged.

The movie continued to play... it was another s*x scene where a man and a woman both naked were making love on the floor, on a doggie position. Suddenly, the door opened and another man came. He was only wearing a white boxer’s short, his hard on swelled on his front. He went on to the bed and while the first man kneeling and continued his pumping, the second man faced him and licked his chest, neck, mouth, and navel, intermittently removing the buried c**k and sucked it.

I felt Bader tightened his hug some more and kissed me on the lips, Hassan and Jafer beside us doing the same. We were so ecstatic and there was an extreme craving for gratification of carnal desires. Then the four of us made love together like we were floating on cloud nine. When were done, we did it all over again, and again, changing partners until we lay flat on the bed. It was like I never felt tired. My mind was still active and it just kept flashing euphoric thoughts.

It was already five thirty a.m. when Bader asked us all to put on our clothes and to prepare to go outside. He was still naked, I could see the silhouette of his excellent built formed in the dimly lit room with his shaft dangling as he stood up turned off the players and the TV monitor. He then took his shirt and wore jogging pants not wearing any brief or underwear. The three of us scampered for our clothes and prepared to leave the room. Bader opened his locker, took two or three medicines, opened the refrigerator and grabbed a soda drink, opened it, gulped the medicines with the drink.

“Hey! Hey! Hey! What are you doing? What did you just ingest?”

“I took again some tablets, what seems to be the problem?” He said in a teasing tone.

“Are you not afraid you may overdose yourself?”

“Don’t worry, it’s ok. I know its effect and I can manage.” He assured me. “Come on let’s get out from here.”

“Where are we going?” I inquired.

“Just a stroll outside”

When we were out of the house, the four of us jumped into his sports car and Bader drove it on top speed. Even if the effect of the medicine was still on my body, I felt some kind of edginess with the speed. “What are you doing? Slow down Bader, slow down!”

“Hahahahahahaha!” the three of them laughed.

“Why are you afraid? You don’t trust me? You’re in a sports car, remember?” Bader said looking at me, his driving slowed down. “Besides, the road is almost empty of cars, don’t you see that?”

“Yeah, but I have a phobia on speed, especially that most accidents in the world happen in country! Do you know that an accident happens here every minute?”

“Wow! You believe that? It’s a piece of crap, intended to scare people” as he gesticulated mimicking. “I’ve been to many accidents before and look at me, I’m still alive! If you are meant to live, you live, but if your time comes, even if you are only sleeping, you’ll wake up dead, you know what I mean?”

“I understand, Bader. But I am scared, ok? I can’t help it.” I pleaded.

“Ok, you’re the boss!”

After a few minutes we arrived in the part of the corniche where there were still a few people congregating. On the parking area I could see different sports car. I thought there could be some kind of a race.

“Mike, I will join the race, ok?”

“What? I am scared Bader, please don’t be stupid. If something happens to you who will bring me back to my accommodation?”

“Tarantado! That’s only your problem? You don’t care if I die as long as you are already in your accommodation? Where is your brain? Mafi Mukh!” He scolded. “You can stay in my house if you want. No one’s gonna throw you out! Besides, I am not going to die yet, ok? But if I will, you can ride a taxi back to your accommodation if that is all your problem. I’ve been joining this race since a long time already. That’s why I have this car. I just love to race. Don’t worry, I’ll be fine and I will win this race. Ok? Ok?” He demanded in his usual commanding tone, giving me an intimidating look, pressuring me to allow him.

“But Bader -”

“No buts... just relax!” He interrupted. “Here, take these, I don’t have a pocket in my jogging pants” endorsing to me his wallet and his cellular phone.

I could not say anything except to nod and follow what he wanted. All I did was check his wallet. He had two fifty-riyals, five ten-riyals, one five-riyal and four one-riyal bills. There were his nationality ID card, his company ID, his ATM, credit card, driver’s license, and other sheets with Arabic names, probably a telephone numbers of his friends. I had also my ID picture, hidden just at the back of his mug shot. In one partition, there was a small folded envelope. I took it, and opened to see its contents. It was the other half of the pendant I was wearing. With the pendant was a small sheet of paper with an Arabic writing. I thought I would ask Bader later about what he wrote in there.

The race started. There were three cars on the start line; Bader’s red car was in the middle. I didn’t know if it was a trial or part of the rule to race three of them only. When somebody shouted in Arabic which sounded like “Ready, on your mark, get set... go!” Everyone froze. The racers started their cars instantly. There was a deafening sound.

The race tracts were only within the corniche area, on the side road which contained some curves. After about thirty minutes, we could already see the three cars approaching with distances not far from each other, and Bader was leading. Everyone was clapping and I could hear Jafer and Hassan shouting and jumping on top of their voice in total jubilation. But suddenly, the left front wheel of Bader’s car snagged with an outcropping concrete by the side of the road. In a flash, his car was hurled into the air spinning. It landed into the ground on its top some meters away and hitting a few spectators.

Everyone rushed to check on Bader. I couldn’t believe my eyes with what happened. I was shocked by the sudden turn of events. I dashed with everyone towards the scene, but instead of extending a hand to help Bader out, the people simply surrounded Bader and the smashed car. I could hear someone shouting. I was later told that the shouting person was reminding the people never to touch anything until the police and the paramedics would arrive. According to them, there is nothing to do without the intervention of the police and legitimate paramedics. In that country one can be penalized for intervening in the scene of the accident if he is not a part of the authorized persons to deal with the situation, especially if the victims die while on rescue

So I just stood there helplessly with the other people, looking at the car with Bader trapped inside. I could see Bader’s head move and there was a surge of blood creeping on the cemented road. I knew it was Bader bleeding. My heart throbbed so fast praying that the police and the paramedics would arrive soon. It was like my heart was torn into pieces to see in such an ordeal the person with whom I just shared one of my sweetest moments as I stayed there just watching him wrestled for his life. And I felt guilty for not exerting that much effort in dissuading from joining in that race.

After about twenty minutes, the police arrived and shortly, the paramedics. The police checked first the area, the car, took pictures, and the paramedics pulled Bader out of the wreck, and into the stretcher. But I did not see Bader move. And the place where Bader and the wrecked car lay was soaked with blood. My mind screamed in fear.

As Bader was brought into the hospital, I asked Jafer and Hassan if I could come with them. But Hassan insisted I should not go there anymore thinking that police might ask me questions. So, they sent me to the taxi terminal. I endorsed to Hassan the wallet and the cell phone which Bader had endorsed me before he embarked on that ill-fated race. Then I headed for the accommodation, my tears rolled down my cheek as the taxi ensued. I was so devastated. I felt like my world collapsed and my heart was stabbed a thousand times. My fear of riding in a taxi with unknown driver was dwarfed by my pain and worry of what just happened. And although I was not familiar with the way back to my accommodation with the crisscrossing desert road, I just let my instinct to dictate me to direct the driver.

It was nine in the morning when I reached the accommodation. I felt like my muscles craved for a break due to lack of sleep and hyperactivity. But the effect of the medicine was still active on my mind. I didn’t feel any urge to sleep. All I wanted was to think and find something to do. But the thought of what could have happened to Bader was at the center of my brain.

At 11 am, I received a call from Hassan. He relayed in broken English the sad information that Bader died shortly when he arrived at the hospital due to excessive loss of blood. He also mentioned that they will bury the remains at four o’clock in the afternoon of that same day.

I was shocked with what I just heard. Just a few hours ago Bader and I was dancing and in all exhilaration. My tears kept rolling down my cheek. My mind screamed for me to go to his place and see his body for the last time. But I couldn’t. In my accommodation, one can’t just go out anytime as there are no taxis available. So I just stayed in my room reviving in my mind the times I spent with Bader playing over and over the song “As Long as You Love Me” which just few hours ago we danced with. It was like I could die. The only thing that consoled me was the pendant which Bader gave me.

One week after Bader’s death, Bader's brother, Amir called me up telling that his father wanted to see me. It was Friday morning and I went downtown with the shoppers. Amir picked me up downtown and brought me to his house. As I met his father, Amir was there translating everything his father told.

“I saw in Bader’s wallet this pendant and I think Bader wanted you to keep this. This was wrapped in a small sheet of paper” showing me the sheet “with an Arabic note written by Bader saying ‘To my special friend Mike’” as his father handed it to me.

I took the pendant from his father. After a few more minutes with him, I asked to be excused. He advised me that I was welcome anytime to visit the family, of which, I nodded.

As I arrived back to my accommodation, I immediately attached the two pendants. It completed the words, “I LOVE YOU”. I released a deep sigh. I wrapped the completed pendant with the Arabic note which Bader had written, wrapped it over with another sheet with an English note I wrote –

“To my special friend, Bader. Wherever you maybe, I can’t thank you enough for all the love that you showed me. Here in this faraway land full of uncertainty and short of true friends, you were there ready to share the things to make me feel comfortable, better, accepted, and loved. Thank you for the many first experiences. Thank you for letting me know you and your family. Thank you for teaching me your culture. Thank you for showing me the nice places and the good side of your country. Thank you for being just there for me. I don’t know the reason why you have to leave that suddenly. You have always told me that if it is your time, you can’t say no. But even if I don’t know the reason at all, I think it’s part of the grand design for us. I can’t question God’s wisdom; I can only think that it must be for the better. One day, when I get back to my country and reach that waning part of my life, I would sit back and tell myself that in this place, there was one special friend who cared, who showed me love, and who became a part of me for a brief moment of time. Yes, you are special to me, Bader. One day, we may meet again and I will look forward to that day. But for now, I bid you goodbye. May you rest in peace…”

After I wrapped the pendant with my note, I went out of my accommodation all alone and into the desert. The 5 o’clock afternoon sun was still scorching at nearly 40 degrees Celsius, the hot wind hissing on against the dunes carrying away bits of it and lodged them into my body as I searched for a place to settle. All I could see were horizons of brownish to reddish sands that formed into dunes. It was eerie. The thought of Bader bleeding and stocked up in that wrecked car was still fresh on my mind... although I could feel him there with me.

I dug into the hot sand using my trembling hands. When the hole was done, I laid the pendant into it. I released a deep sigh as I covered the gaps, soaked up myself with the pain of letting go. As I buried our pendant, I buried with it our love…

I stayed there for a couple of minutes, reminisced the times when Bader and I owned the world and everything seemed perfect. I let the tears flowed down freely from my eyes until I was tired of weeping. Then I stood up and went back to my room feeling a deep sense of incompleteness.

With Bader’s death, I felt that a part of me has died...

(End)