Beneath His Armor

Chapter 4: The Wedding Night (SOFIE)

The wedding was as expected. Immaculate and impeccable. Smiles and congratulations all over. It was blur, a day filled with overwhelming inInstead of going to my maternal home, I came with Adrian to his home. The estate was grand and I found myself standing at the heart of it. This was no longer a house she visits, this is my home now. The thought should have brought some comfort into my heart but instead a cold feeling overwhelmed me.

Adrian, my husband, the man that I am married to yet felt nothing for, was standing next to me. His tall figure towering over me. He was as composed as always. He was an imposing figure, with broad shoulders and a presence that demanded attention. Yet with all this close proximity, he felt soo distant, almost unreachable. I glanced up at him, at his face, trying to search for any information from his face, but no. His face was unreadable, devoid of any emotion.

“Shall we retire for the evening?” Adrian’s voice was calm, betraying none of the tension between them.

I nodded. Not trusting my own voice. Sometimes my mouth runs faster than my brain. My heart thudded in my chest. As to why that was happening, I had no answer to.

Each heartbeat, to me was a reminder of what was to come.

I knew this day would come and I had prepared for it. But no matter what, one old never be fully prepared for the reality of being married to a man I barely knew.

Adrian led me to the grand foyer and up the massive staircase. Seriously he should this . It’s too long ugh. Our footsteps were echoing on the posh marble floor. The house was quiet. I assumed the servants have retreated to their quarters as it was night time. It was just the two of us.

At the top of the stairs, Adrian paused, his hand resting on the barristers. He turned to look at me as if assessing me. For a moment I thought that maybe he had changed his mind about marrying me. Is he going to “unmarry” me? “Your room is just down the hall on the right. I trust that everything will be to your satisfaction. Also if you need anything, the servants will be at your disposal. They will be at your beck and call.

I swallowed hard, forcing myself to meet his gaze. “Thank you.” I said softly.

There was a moment of silence, soo much that you can actually hear a water droplet. He nodded curtly and said “ Goodnight then.” With that he turned and walked away, leaving me alone at the stop of the stairs.

For a moment I stood there shocked, frozen in my place. I thought that… that he was going to… to… to be with me. To deflower me. I thought that he was going to be with me for the night. Honestly, for some unknown reason, I wanted to call it to him. To tell him to stay with me. But my words died in my throat. I have know right to do that. Moreover what the hell is wrong with me? This should not happen again. I reprimanded myself.

With a deep breath I turned and started walking to the end of the hall when something caught my eye. Huh? Did the wall just move? Nope. I must be mistaken. I walked to my new room and opened the doors. The room was large. The bed was a king sized bed with fancy and expensive fabrics, looking inviting. This was supposed to be my wedding night. A night that marked a new chapter of my new life. But all I could feel was a deep loneliness.

I crossed the room to the window, my fingers lifting the huge curtains aside. The night outside was dark, the bright full moon illuminating its light on the landscapes. I could hear the distant waves crashing against the cliffs. A reminder of the estate’s isolation from the world. The sound was oddly soothing, comforting her amidst the turmoil inside me.

I didn’t know how long I stood there staring into the nights. My thoughts were interrupted when I heard a soft click from the door. I turned slightly frightened only to find a maid standing in the doorway, her head bowed.

“My apologies Milady, I knocked several times but I got no response and thought—”

“It’s alright.” I interrupted her.

“Milady,” the maid started, her voice gentle. “Is there anything you need?”

I shook my head, feeling a pang of guilt “ No thank you. I am fine.”

The maid hesitated for a while before saying again “Do you need me to help you to prepare for bed Milady?”

Again I shook my head “No thank you, I will be fine.” I answered.

The maid quickly nodded her head a few times and walked backwards out of the room.

I went to the bed and sat at the edge of it. The soft silky feel of it threatening mind blowing fantasies. I had always dreamed of this night. My weeding night. With my husband, a man I love and a man who loves me. A man who cares for me. I pictured this night in so many different ways, yet the harsh reality seemed to love me too much that it always destroyed all my dreams and fantasies. There was no warmth here, no affection, nothing. Just loneliness.

I stood up and begun to undress slowly. The wedding gown, a masterpiece of lace and silk, was beautiful but burdensome. I struggled to remove it but eventually I did. Feeling too lazy to go take a bath I climbed the bed and pulled the covers up to my chin. I held tightly unto one pillow, placed one under my head and another one at my feet. I closed my eyes and tried to sleep but my mind refused to be quiet. For some unknown reason my thoughts went to Adrian. Yh what about him?

I don’t know how long I lay there stuck in my own mind but eventually, the stress started to take a toll on me. My eyelids became heavier and in no time I was embraced by darkness