After the Breakup

Keeping in Touch

I arrived at the airport in Manila at around 12am, the flight was delayed for less than an hour. An hour more that I could have spent with Khalil.

I took a Grab from there to my place condo in Quezon City.  I’m normally excited when I get home after any trip but this time, it feels heavy. I checked my mobile phone and I saw Khalil’s message on i********:, asking me about my flight and if I’m already in the Philippines. We had been messaging each other since he left the airport.  Just checking on each other, talking about random stuff that comes to mind.

“I’m home” I typed in my IG direct message and sent to Khalil

It took a while before he answered that I thought he’s already sleeping.

“Great. I was booking my flight to the Philippines so I didn’t see your message immediately.  I just can’t wait to see you again.  I’m booked on the 15th of June.”

I can’t help but smile when I read his message. June 15 is just 3 weeks away and I can’t contain the excitement of seeing him again. The thought of seeing him makes the fact that we won’t be seeing each other for a while more bearable. It gave me something to look forward to after what I expect to be a dragging 3 weeks of catching up with work.

“I can’t wait.  How long are you staying? Forever?” I asked, half-teasing, half-meaning what I said.

“I wish but it’s just for 2 weeks though”

“Ok. Too bad though.” I answered with a sad faced emoji. “Aren’t you going to sleep yet? It’s already late”

“Yes, I’m sleeping soon. I just wanted to make sure you’re home safe before I do.”

I placed my luggage at the corner of my room. Went to the bathroom for a quick shower then went straight to bed.  

I typed in goodnight and sent to Khalil

“Goodnight” he replied

I didn’t really sleep afterwards. I just said goodnight so he will sleep already but there’s still so much going on in my mind that it will take time before I fall asleep.

Coming home after the trip gives me a mixed of emotions.  Every corner of my condo reminds me of Mark and his memories are starting to creep in, but the memories Khalil and I made while I’m in Japan now holds a special place in my heart too.

I wonder how Mark is doing.  I messaged him a couple of times after the breakup but never received any reply.  I wasn’t really asking him to come back. I still have my pride to do that. My messages were more like how are you doing and that sort of stuff. I wanted to make sure he is okay since I still don’t understand why we broke up anyway.

I checked Mark’s social media again. I haven’t been able to do it for 2 days since I was preoccupied with thoughts about Khalil, our parting, and all the emotions that goes with it. Still, nothing’s happening. Why won’t he change his relationship status? I have changed mine just the day after we broke up. He broke up with me but it seems that he doesn’t want to make it public that is now available and free.  Most guys who break up with their girlfriends would probably do that immediately after just to announce to other girls that they are now available.

But anyway, he left me so why bother thinking about him? Now, I have someone who seem to really want to be with me. Mark and I started that way anyway, we couldn’t get enough of each other then that there wasn’t any day during our first few years that we don’t see each other, but now I don’t even know where he is.

I stared at the ceiling, trying to recall my time with Khalil.  His kisses, his hugs. How is it different from Mark’s kisses? I don’t really know but they just feel different though I cannot really doubt the emotions that I felt when they kissed me.

I touched my lips and try to feel Khalil’s lips on mine. Remembering how it felt. I think I fell asleep smiling thinking about it.

I woke up the next morning with a video of him drinking a cup of coffee at the hotel’s restaurant, making it look as if we’re having coffee together.  I smiled, knowing that it will be a good day