Matters of the Hart

Chapter 16 - Would Gandhi get mad if threw just one punch?

Paulo Coelho once wrote, 'When you want something, the whole world conspires to help you achieve it'.

Well, in a universe where our destinies played out with binding principles, I wouldn't have doubted this for a second. After all, the universe knows everything. But I guess Thea Hart's universe was the one exception to every rule that could actually work in her favour. Yay life.

I wasn't going to be one of those people who would challenge this statement in totality or be hell bent on proving a celestial flaw with Mr. Coelho's theories, but the exceptions needed to be justified, and a minor modification wouldn't hurt, right?

Right.

Here goes.

Thea Hart (from the planet of anything but apes) once said, 'Whether you want something or you don't, the universe doesn't care. It still conspires to produce jerks that piss you off even when they so much as breathe in your direction'.

I could very well support my theory; prove it with examples.

Example A: Nathaniel Knight. Sigh. As much as I wanted to explain this in depth, I wouldn't want to regret wasting my productive time on it, pun intended.

Exhibit B: Noah Stark.

Now imagine that I wrote that in bold, capital letters.

Noah Stark was the prime reason I was here, in the almost empty library (except for Martha but you know how chatty she is, note the sarcasm), waiting for his annoying presence after school hours just so he could walk in like a pain in the butt that he was and I could tutor him like I was supposed to almost thirty minutes ago. And here I was, thinking that Tuesday would be a better day for me? How silly is that! Better days and Thea Hart didn't fit in the same sentence.

As I let out the zillionth breath of frustration of being possibly stood up, in walked the ass of the hour: Noah. Dumb, irritating, 'can't ever be on time' Noah. Stupid Noah with a huge shot-eating grin on his face that he thought was his way to escape my wrath. Yeah, he can't.

"You're late," I pointed out curtly, placing my pencil on the table. Two more seconds and that poor thing would have snapped into two.

"Aw, princess. Miss me?" he smirked and I immediately regretted putting that pencil down. Now would have been a good time to stab him with it so I could go home and binge on Kit-Kats in peace.

"You've already wasted my thirty minutes, please just open the damn book and study so I can leave," I breathed out, grabbing my copy of Pride and Prejudice. This was a bad idea. Tutoring Noah today was a bad idea. Scratch that, tutoring him was a bad idea. Double scratch that, my existence was a bad idea.

Noah looked at me in surprise, or shock, one of the two; I couldn't decide. "Alright, Princess. Who peed in your Cheerios?"

I rolled my eyes, not even bothering to reply as I struggled to find the page we were on the last time. Ugh, last Friday I was so busy thinking about that stupid, pointless 'let's go eat' event with...that regret-some guy that I had completely zoned out on Noah all through Friday/'s session. The reason I was struggling to find my bookmark. Wait, did I even keep a bookmark in?

"Is this about yesterday?" I froze. Literally. How would Noah know? Who would tell him? Even Amelia didn't know what happened. She asked me a lot of times about the cafeteria scene but I just shrugged it off saying I was having severe stomach cramps. Of course she knew something was wrong and of course I knew that she knew that something was off but for my sake, we both pretended to believe each other's false pretence. Even if Amelia had known, she wouldn't have actually told anything to Noah.

What I meant was: by now, Noah would have had at least a black eye for holding her back as she punched Nate on repeat.

"What happened to you anyway? You...you looked like you were about to cry. I mean I was worried...but then so was somebody else," I wasn't even looking at his face but I was so sure that he wouldn't go back without even a single drop of blood shed if he opened his mouth again. But since I was the self-proclaimed ambassador of peace as appointed by the spirit of Gandhi, I only just glared at the open book in front of me.

"It's nothing," I snapped. "Which page were we on?"

"Princess, you're a really bad liar," Noah tsk-ed. Yes, he tsk-ed. Tell me, would Gandhi get mad if I threw just one punch? Just one, promise.

"You're a really bad student, but you don't see me complaining about that," I retorted back. You're right, I did pick up that pencil.

Noah raised his eyebrows (he tried raising only one - didn't go as planned. What a failure).

"Wow, you're snappy today," he sighed, opening his book. Progress!

"Wow, you're slow today," I sassed back. Thea Hart may be hurt but she could never, ever leave her box of sass home. It was like my personalised non-concrete first-aid kid (cut you and tape your mouth at the same time). Well, my first-aid included Kit-Kats too but then again, the chances of me getting hypoglycaemia were much less than those of me getting the role of Tris in the next 'Divergent' film if I didn't soothe myself with my inherent talent.

"What's gotten into you- oh," he widened his eyes and suddenly I wasn't not sure I was liking the fact that the wheels in his little head were churning. "Are you...is it that...time of the month for you?"

That's it.

"Noah," I banged my book on the table, and thankfully luck was on my side - the tip of my pencil was right in front of his left eye.

"One more word, Noah and I swear I'll stab you with this pencil."

"It'll break, princess," he chuckled.

"I'll break your head with the fattest book this library has," I affirmed. Of course I knew that the nib would break. I was just...trying to be intimidating, which clearly didn't work out so well for me.

Noah, like the self-given of cool that he was, broke out into a fit of chuckles for the second time in a row before shaking his head, "You won't break my head, princess."

Want to bet, Nonah?

Noah. s**t.

I looked at the big clock over Martha's head. Not literally; the wall clock hung on the wall behind her desk.

Well, well, guess who's time was up? His.

I slouched back into my seat, shoving my copy inside along with the pencil that I never put to any good use today. When Noah's little episode of laughter died down a little, he seemed to have noticed my actions as he visibly stiffened, clearing his throat.

"Look, in all seriousness, I don't know who has upset you so much but I'm sure you or....Lia will take care of it, if she hasn't already," there was a pregnant pause involved, post which he continued with words that I could not bear to hear any more than what had already been said.

"If not, just tell me...Thea. I mean I…I...I could...you know...help. We're...friends...right?"

Yes.

But I couldn't say it. Not today.

"If you're done...," I started walking myself to the door, already having had enough of drama one week and the week wasn't even over yet. "...I will take your leave now."

"Thea..."

"See you tomorrow, Noah," I said as the door behind me shut on accord and that was how Tuesday was left behind. Another day, another way of getting over yesterday.

**********

Wednesday and Thursday were literally spent trying to avoid all the Broody Brothers, one in particular but all in general. Wednesday, it worked - the oldest trick in the book. If you see them standing to your left, take a right.

Thursday, they probably figured about my epic game-plan. It wasn't like Caleb would have minded anyway; I bet he was secretly happy that I hadn't shown my face around him and his precious butterflies.

Noah Stark tried and it was really hard to evade that one, but I managed. After Wednesday's hour of tutoring, I did leave. Thankfully, he was on time and I didn't have waste it throwing stale attitude at him.

Lucas…

Well, Luke was standing outside the girls' washroom guarding the door as we speak. My hyper-alertness could spot him from afar and it wasn't even tough; he was so tall sometimes I thought it probably wasn't even normal.

At this point I had an important decision to make - to pee or not to pee?

Pros - too many.

Cons - I would have to get past Lucas.

Well, weighing those two together was easy, the scale was definitely tipping towards better bladder habits. So 'not peeing' it was.

Maybe I could use the third floor washroom?

Yup, good idea.

My resolve was strong but unfortunately for me, my bladder wasn't. I turned around at once.

Big, big mistake.

"Hey," he breathed out not wasting a single second.

I heard it, but I didn't. I was too preoccupied; his signature black jacket was missing. The stubble on his face was attractively ill-managed, hair looked like fingers had run through them too often that I would like to think, some strands even sticking to his forehead (which made him look incredibly hot). And those eyes. Damn, those eyes. I could get lost in their storm forever and I wouldn't even mind.

Now, do you recognise the pattern? Exactly! This was wrong - on so many levels. I was supposed to be mad at him. I was supposed to avoid his ferocious gaze and I was sure as hell not supposed to squirm when he looked at me in that way that he always looked at me in. Damn, his eyes. They always pulled me in, every single time.

"Hey," I replied, looking away as I tried to get past him. Well, I tried.

He knew it would play out like that. That guy played excessive soccer but luckily for him, his brain was in his head and not in his knees and he did manage to use it from time to time so it was in fully functional condition. He blocked my way, sliding into my personal space very efficiently and now we were the only two people in the hallway, (along with Lucas, or was he gone?) with barely five centimetres of space between our lips. Great work, Thea.

"Why are you avoiding me?"

You should know by now, Doofus. Although I was glad he didn't. His minty breath though, it hit my lips and suddenly it's like I couldn't breathe in the air enveloping us. Suddenly it's dark and I was in the park. It was just like the night he had kissed me; it was just before the morning he regretted it. So what do you do to avoid breaking under the tension to be able to breathe properly? You turn away.

"I'm not. I'm busy," I looked to my side, taking a few steps back.

"Busy?" Although I wasn't looking him, I knew all about what his expression would have been right about now, and I could say just by the air of question in his voice.

And I was right, like always. He had his eyebrows raised at my unwillingness, even so at my unwillingness to stay any closer to him than I was right now.

"Yes, Nathaniel," I nodded curtly.

"I was busy." I affirmed in confirmation. Obviously, he wasn't convinced. Wonder if I should have used his full name…

"What's with the tone?" he stepped forward, and into my personal space once again. Didn't he know what that did to me?

Maybe he did; that's probably why he came forth. Maybe he knew it drove my heart crazy. Maybe he could hear my heart beating so fast like it was beating right now.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I shrugged nonchalantly.

"Shortcake, come on."

There it was. That stupid, illogical pet name he used to call me with. That was it. I knew then that if I didn't leave immediately, two things were bound to happen. I would either give into our intimacy or I would break apart right in front of his eyes. I chose neither.

"I have to go. I have class." This time, I was the one who caught him off-guard as I walked right past him. I was already five minutes late to class, not to mention that I had to pee first.

But neither happened. I mean, I did get to class, just the wrong one. And empty one which Nathaniel Knight suddenly pulled me in, locking the door behind us and pushing me against the wall as he covered my body with his, so close that our lips brushed. I swear I felt a spark.

"You're not leaving until I say so." He whispered dangerously close to my lips.

"Seriously?" I ridiculed. His closeness didn't affect me. I didn't affect me. It didn't…

Oh, who was I kidding? He knew it did. Hence the stupid smirk that I could feel on his lips, radiating onto mine.

"Yes," he snapped back suddenly, placing his right hand next to my head as he leaned against me. s**t. That was too close. I had nowhere to escape.

"What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing's wrong," I whispered back, my fingers eager to feel him, touch him if they could. Only my mind knew that it was a bad idea. A very destructible idea.

"Bullshit."

I stepped to my left, extending my hand just a little before he caught on to what I was trying to do. A little further and I would have unlocked the door knob and saved us both this exhausting ordeal. His hand, my wrist in it, locked behind my back now as he pulled me in, flush against him. The obvious pressure on my left wrist made it impossible to escape, not that my body wanted to. My right hand landed on his cloth-covered torso and it burned. That's how heated we felt right now. At least I did.

What am I doing?!?!?!

"Let go of me, Nate," Realisation struck all at once and I cleared my throat, struggling to get out of his strong, wanton hold. Obviously, he wouldn't have it. All he had was a smirk - a disgustingly stupid, 'bad-boy caught you feeling him up' smirk.

"No," he smirked.

I sighed.

"Nathaniel, I have to go." I pleaded to the proximity between us, tears now threatening to well up in my eyes. This was too much. It was overwhelming. It was a lot for my feeble heart to take in. I looked down in defeat. Only now, my forehead tingled because his breath fell directly in the middle. Would he kiss it?

"First, tell me what's wrong," he breathed out. He was still onto it as his lips grazed my forehead, placing a feather light kiss on it. s**t.

"Was it Caleb? Did he say something to you?" He prodded.

"No."

"Then what is it?"

"It's nothing," I sighed.

"Stop lying."

"I'm not lying," I shook my head lightly. This conversation was going nowhere. We were going nowhere. He sure as hell couldn't know that I knew how he felt about the kiss we had shared. That would be too humiliating for me. It would be too much if he told me himself that he...

Never mind.

"You are," he confirmed his doubts.

Just like you did. About us.

That's it. It was time to fight back.

"Oh my God, Nathaniel! Just leave me be!" I yelled into his torso, before blinking my tears away and decidedly pushing him away.

"I just want to get to class and get this day over with. Let me go, please! What part of it is difficult to grasp!?" I shouted, fixating my eyes on his handsome face, glaring into the dark.

I could feel it - he sucked in a sharp breath as he even let go of my hand that he had caged behind me. The hand that captured me between him and the wall fell too, away from me and beside his body. I was thankful that it was dark, since I couldn't make out his expression, but I knew that I had bruised him. I felt his hand release me and I let out a breath.

"I'm sorry I asked," he stepped away from me and I almost winced at the loss of contact. It was hurtful. I needed it, even when I knew that I shouldn't have. It was pathetic of me.

I heard the door click open as a ray of light entered, lighting the blinding room as he walked out.

"You're free to go," he said, banging the door loudly behind him as he left me - alone, teary and aching.