The Football Player And His Ballerina

Marriage 2

Lara POV

The words marriage for a year generated panic in my mind. I left the room breathless, on the verge of a panic attack.

The tears started to run without stopping and without my face making any expression or sound. I wanted to blame Sophie for not bringing up that clause, I wanted to blame myself for not reading it properly, and I wanted to blame Kyle for showing up in my life. I started by blaming us one by one, then I blamed everyone, and eventually I realized that of everyone, the least guilty was really Kyle who was in the same situation as me. Actually, Kyle's position is much better than mine. If he doesn't want to get married, he will be able to afford it. As a top soccer player, he earns millions a year, plus what he earns in advertising, in appearances at events, or even in his personal business, which I know he has, because he mentioned it on our first night together.

And me? A dancer doesn't get paid that much, my career will be over, because the Director of the Kingdom will never allow his image to be tarnished. I may be good at what I do, but the truth is that there are dozens, maybe even hundreds, of professional dancers ready to take my place. And right now, I can't have any more scandals in my life. I have to solve my big problem first without getting extra attention. I am already in danger of making my relationship public, let alone getting married and making my wedding a media event. I have done a lot of research on Kyle and I know he is a man for many women. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and accepted a relationship, but what about the rest? Marriage is another level, something deep that unites two people and is supposed to last a lifetime. I don't want to have a life like my mother's—betrayed and alone. She lost her husband, was left alone with a daughter to raise and a heart of stone that wouldn't allow anyone of the opposite s*x to come close. I don't want that for myself. When I decide to get married, I want to do it with all certainty, and certainly not now with my career at the top and so much to lose. But being a dancer is not like being a soccer player. I don't earn the same as Kyle, not even close. I may be a soloist at Kingdom, but my salary is nothing, it's just enough for a comfortable life, nothing more. How can I pay the Deior brand for the damages? The last thing I wanted was to get married for convenience. What about Kyle? Is he ready for marriage? What if our relationship doesn't work out? What if he doesn't want me? What if...? I hear some footsteps approaching and see Sophie and Yas a few feet away. They sit beside me in silence, and I am grateful for that, my internal dialogue is already too big and complex to involve other points of view.

Long minutes passed, and I had forgotten that I was not alone.

"Lara, darling, please speak." Yas almost begged, looking at me with tears in her eyes.

"I don't know what to think. Where is Kyle?" I asked, it seems like it's time to talk to those who actually matter. It doesn't do me much good to talk to my friends or to my brother, who has joined us in the meantime.

"He went out with Dean and Tolga. They went to take care of some business." Rod answers me with a smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes. He is too calm for the situation. I looked at him in confusion, and my brother must have understood because he immediately replied.

"Don't worry, it's related to your situation." I sighed in relief, the worst thing that could happen to me is Kyle disappearing without us resolving this situation.

"Sophie and Yas, may I speak to Lara alone, please?" His voice was too delicate, and I looked at him, trying to understand his thoughts. Rob has always been my shoulder to cry on. If there is one person who knows me, it is him, more than Sophie and more than my own mother. Our bond has always been very strong, and we have always supported each other, even though, many times, to deal with our lives we could only really count on each other. Our mothers were drowned in sorrow and in the events of their lives, and sometimes, although they were present in our lives and were perfect mothers, each in her own way, they suffered too much, which also made us suffer, and it was on each other's shoulders that we found the support we needed.

"Rob, I... I'm sorry! I never thought I would live through an experience like this." I said this with tears streaming down my face. I was actually afraid that he, more than anyone else, would criticize and judge me.

"Shhhhh!" he said as he hugged me and let me lay my head on his shoulder, that shoulder, that safe haven.

"It's not your fault. None of this is anyone's fault. Lara, I know this is too much for you, but don't let despair get the better of you. Kyle seems to be sincere in his feelings for you, or at least he appears to be. He has dozens, maybe thousands, of women willing to be with him, yet you are the one he chose to date. Maybe he hurts you, maybe he's not what I think he is, maybe this is all a mistake, but the truth is that, regardless of all this, you have a legal situation to work out, and whatever you decide will have my full support." His tender kiss on the top of my head makes me release all the pressure I feel, and I start to cry convulsively. I feel his arm squeezing me sweetly and his hand lightly patting my back. "I don't want to get married!" I confess between tears and sobs. I feel his rib cage filling and leaking the inhaled air almost forcefully. He pulls me away slightly so as to stare at my face.

"Lara, if you don't want to, don't get married! The question here isn't even whether you want a real marriage or not, I guess. It's whether you want to fight Deior in court, and whether you're willing to do so. The marriage may be real on paper, but it will only be real in your lives if you decide so. The question right now is what you want to do. Having a relationship doesn't help, because there are already feelings involved, it's not just a sham between the two of you, it will always create expectations. "

"I don't understand!" Actually, what my brother is telling me is only creating more confusion. I thought he would be totally against marriage for convenience. After all, this is a modern age, not the time of our great grandparents.

"What I mean is that you can decide whether you want the marriage to be real or just fake to get yourselves out of this situation. That is your decision. I think what you should be concerned about is not the marriage itself, in context, but rather, whether or not this is the best solution to the legal situation that all this may create." What he says makes sense, Kyle and I can agree to get married, but we'll take things at our own pace with no promises, no pressure. The question is whether we really have to take this step to get out of the problems created by the trademark. And if I think about it, marriage is my best choice. It will help me avoid being fired, seeing my image burned in the public's eye, and most importantly, it will free me from having to pay fees that I can't afford.

" The Kingdom Ballet won't forgive me. If I don't accept this, I'll be fired, and my career might end here." I noted this sadly. "That's why. The idea of you getting married like this and taking on your relationship as a real marriage is something that scares me and something I would like to avoid at all costs. I think you both should get to know each other and make decisions based on your conscience. However, after analyzing everything coldly, if you don't accept, you will throw all the years of work away, because Kingdom has associated itself with this contract and any other dance company might be afraid to hire you as a soloist because of the image." Rob's words are the most accurate reality; we have seen in the past situations dancers who were damaged, despite being very good, by scandals. And in this case, the scandals are not personal but professional, which can lead to damaged relationships and trust. I worked many years to get where I am, I didn't go out with friends, I didn't have boyfriends, and I lived exclusively for dancing.

"Rob, but what scares me the most is if they find out about our past. My mom won't be able to handle it." I can't deny that my biggest fear is my parents' reaction, seeing their personal life exposed, their lies and their pain exposed.

"As for that, it's a matter of the public relations people working properly to hide that part. I really don't think we're that famous to expose our parents' lives, and even if we did, the mistakes would be theirs, not ours. Why do we always have to be the ones to pay for their mistakes?" Rob said with a certain resentment, and I can't condemn him. For a long time, we were a weapon between our mothers and our father. Because they didn't understand each other, they used us as a weapon to hurt each other, which is very sad but typical in many relationships. Children suffer the consequences of their parents' disagreements. I sigh deeply and decide that I will talk to Kyle as soon as I arrive. I may have to tell him my secret too, because really, this whole thing can only make my situation worse. "Thanks, Rob." I thanked my brother and stepped out of his clutch.

"So? What are you going to decide?" He asked me with uncertainty in his gaze and I sketched a small, sad smile.

"To talk to Kyle." I said with determination in my voice, and hoping to get some kind of agreement with him.