The Woman in His Story

Chapter 1

Vanessa grabbed her bag and headed out the door. It had been a week since she had slept with Lionel, and he had completely ghosted her. She didn’t really mind, but it was still a d**k move. He didn’t even try again that night, even though she tried to initiate it. She was left incredibly horny and annoyed.

Vanessa pushed that unpleasantness aside. She was meeting her friends for brunch. It had been a while since Vanessa had been out, and to be fair, it was still quite a mission. She had gotten used to working from home and did not miss the daily commute to work. There was peace in solitude. Her introverted self had made a complete comeback.

Vanessa had always kept to herself growing up. In high school, she and her boyfriend had many friends. Eventually, when they broke up, Vanessa quickly learned she had no real friends. That was until college. Vanessa smiled to herself. As much as she stuck to herself then, she managed to make friends, including her best friend, Kyle. That was almost 15 years ago; Kyle had been her friend through everything. People often used to think they were dating. That was until he married Viktor. Vanessa laughed as she saw the two of them waiting for her at their favorite breakfast spot.

“She looks the same,” said Kyle to Viktor dramatically. “I thought she’d get some last night,”

“Really? That’s the first thing I have to hear out of your mouth?” sighed Vanessa as she sat down.

Viktor looked at her sympathetically, “Don’t listen to his nonsense. You know we’re just glad to see you,”

Vanessa squeezed Viktor’s hand, “You’re my favorite best friend,”

“Yeah, only because he’s my husband,” said Kyle.

Vanessa stuck her tongue out at him.

“But, seriously. Did you not get any? I thought you liked this guy?” asked Kyle.

“Guys, my s*x life, or lack thereof, is not what I want to talk about today,” she said.

Vanessa didn’t want to tell them what happened. It was way too embarrassing. She couldn’t have a meaningful adult relationship, and even s*x was disappointing.

“Baby, you’ll find someone. You just have to keep looking,” said Viktor.

“Maybe I’m not supposed to, V. Maybe I’m meant to live alone for the rest of my life,” said Vanessa quietly.

She was tired of looking, of online dating, the lies, and disappointment.

“Are you on Tinder?” asked Kyle.

“No. Stop. Please. I can’t do it anymore. It’s not for me,” Vanessa said. “I know that meeting someone these days is hard. I’m just not cut out for online dating. It’s all based on looks - and I’m not someone men look at and go, ‘I need to know her.’”

“Don’t say that,” said Viktor.

“V, a guy once told me I have a pretty face - and then proceeded to ask how much I weigh,”

“No!” gasped Kyle.

“You guys have been married for so long. Dating’s different now. s*x is so easy to come by. It’s actually a turn-off rather than a turn-on,” said Vanessa, as she tried to get the waiter’s attention.

“No!” gasped Kyle again. “Don’t say that. You’re not going to turn into a nun, right?”

“You’re insulting nuns,” Vanessa said with a straight face.

“Well, yes, that’s true. But what I mean is, don’t give up. You have so much to offer, and we want you to have the happiness we have someday,” said Kyle.

“Whatever. What are we eating?” asked Vanessa, trying to change the subject.

Vanessa wanted what they had. She longed for it, but she also knew she would not miraculously find someone to share her life with. Life had taught her cruelly not to get so caught up with the idea of someone that she forgot herself.

“Before we eat, we have news,” said Viktor, eyeing Kyle.

“What?” asked Vanessa.

“Dear, can’t we eat first?” whined Kyle.

Viktor just looked at Kyle and waited for him to start talking.

“I got a new job,” pouted Kyle.

“That’s great! Where?” asked Vanessa.

Kyle had a stressful job. He worked for a massive international company and was constantly under pressure. Viktor hated seeing him anxious all the time.

“It’s for a smaller company. In Germany,” said Kyle hesitantly.

“That’s amazing! Oh, I’m so happy for you!” said Vanessa, beaming.

On the inside, Vanessa was already sobbing. These two were her closest friends, but she would not lose them. They would just be further away.

“We need to celebrate! Mimosas!” said Vanessa.

They spent the next three hours talking about Germany and how she would have to come to visit them. By the time Vanessa got back home, she was tipsy. Next time they would have to start the mimosas after eating. She collapsed onto the couch and stared at the ceiling. The tears slid effortlessly as she realized she would be truly alone now. All her female friends were married and had kids. Trying to schedule a day out with them was almost impossible. They also made it her responsibility to make plans because she had time. At least, that’s what they always thought because she was single.

Vanessa did not know what else she could do. Was she supposed to lose more weight and walk around with a face full of makeup? Vanessa knew she was not the best looking, but she also knew she had a lot to offer. She hated when her mind drifted to this place.

“I am a smart, confident, beautiful woman!” she said aloud, trying to convince herself. “If a man cannot see that, then he is not the man for me.”

Vanessa had been telling herself this since her heart broke in high school. Her boyfriend had cheated on her repeatedly. She was incredibly naive to expect anything more from a horny teenage boy. He had been her first everything, and she had stupidly done everything he asked. When she finally found out what was happening, he convinced her to take him back. But things changed. He’d get jealous if she spoke to anyone else and started keeping her away from their friends. Looking back, she knew it was because he didn't want her to discover his lies. She finally walked away in their senior year but knew he had damaged her. It was hard for Vanessa to trust a guy again.

“Everything happens for a reason,” Vanessa whispered.