Cigarettes On Balconies

Vanilla and Chocolate

Jeon Jungkook fiddled with his ring of keys, twirling them around his slender index finger as he pushed open the glass door of the apartment building with his forearm. Clenched in his other fist was a pack of convenience store ramen, intended for later usage. After the s**t week the alpha had had, he felt the desperate need to relax on his Saturday night. It had been his first week back to school as a university senior and he’d already gotten a huge pile of assignments. 

The neighbor had been the icing on the cake for Jungkook that morning. Jungkook had unfortunately been unable to introduce himself to the other man until recently. He had caught a glimpse of the male through the balcony door on occasion, in the mornings. Also Jungkook could easily smell the omega pheromones that wafted through the walls. However, when he stepped out onto his balcony that morning with the intent of introducing himself, the omega seemed far from impressed. Nor was he welcoming.

“Ah, speak of the devil,” Jungkook mumbled under his breath. Pausing slightly on the filthy staircase, Jungkook glanced ahead of him to the next landing. Standing there in the darkened shadows was his strawberry swirl omega. Watching for a moment, he noted the omega struggling with what appeared to be a gym bag slung over his shoulder and several grocery bags in his hands. Licking his lips slightly, Jungkook took the remaining steps up to the landing.

“Need some help?” Jungkook offered in his kindest voice. He flipped his shaggy chocolate hair, that was well overdue for a haircut, out of his face. Flashing a warm smile, he hoped the omega would be welcoming.

The unnamed omega glanced upwards at Jungkook. At first glance the omega appeared to be grateful for the offer. His expression was soft and he had released a sigh of relief. However, the moment he locked eyes with the alpha, the blonde man frowned. Letting out a deep groan, the omega straightened his back to stand proud. “No, thank you.” he answered firmly. But the man was clearly struggling, stumbling with the bags.

Jungkook raised a questioning eyebrow. “Are you certain of that?” Jungkook pressed on. He held out a hand for a set of bags.

“What, you think I can’t handle it?” Blondie argued with a frown. “The bags look too heavy for the precious little omega. I need a big strong alpha to carry the bags for me? Can’t handle it myself, eh?” The omega struggled under the weight of the bags, one of the handles beginning to slip from his grip.

“Come on, darling, let me help.” Jungkook insisted.

“Excuse you?” the man hissed out. And Jungkook realized in that moment he had clearly made a mistake. The omega took a step away from the alpha. “I am not your darling. Don’t call me that.” Blondie made a face, scrunching his nose slightly, in distaste.

“In my defense, you never properly introduced yourself.” Jungkook argued. “So I don’t exactly know your name now, do I, darling?” The urge to fight against the omega pushed against Jungkook’s mind. It was within his natural alpha instincts – as well as childhood upbringing – to compel the omega to submit. Plus, Jungkook just wanted to push this omega’s buttons – it seemed like an amusing way to pass his time.

“There was nothing proper regarding your introduction, either.” Blondie shot back as a fierce reply. He shifted some of the bags to the floor, to take a break; another huff of air escaped his lips. “You checked out my ass and drank my coffee. I wouldn’t necessarily call that ideal.”

“Isn’t it every omega’s wish to be physically appealing and appease an alpha through things like making them coffee?” Jungkook frowned slightly. Isn’t that mentality part of the omega’s natural personality? Are they not raised to bend to an alpha’s will?

“You didn’t even like the coffee!” Blondie snapped.

“Well you should have added cream and sugar!” Jungkook fired back.

“How the hell was I supposed to know that’s how you took your coffee?” Blondie questioned, appearing extremely unimpressed.

“You could’ve asked.” Jungkook made the statement as though it was the most obvious thing.

“And do what? Go inside and make you a custom coffee, to your taste?” Blondie asked.

“Well… yeah?” Jungkook glanced side to side as though looking for support from someone who wasn’t present. Was he stupid for thinking that? An omega would want to service and please the alpha, right? He’s had omegas fight each other in clubs over the position of buying him a drink. “Isn’t that something all omegas want to do? Cater to an alpha?”

The omega rolled his eyes but he didn’t appear very surprised. “What the hell kind of backwards thinking were you raised with? I am not a cute little house omega that comes when an alpha calls.”

“I never said you were.” Jungkook argued in return. This omega was impossible. Jungkook had been trying to do a nice act, offering to carry the heavy bags. And it only turned around to become an argument.

“Yeah, but you certainly implied it.” omega hissed in response.

“Look, darling,” Jungkook stated firmly, wanting more than anything to bring this conversation to a close. “All I did was offer to help carry your bags. I never meant to imply you were incapable because of your sub gender, or that omegas are only competent as housekeepers.”

“You certainly have a poor way with your words...” the omega mumbled.

“So that’s a no to the help then?” Jungkook asked the obvious.

“It’s a no.” the omega agreed. The slender man reached down to retrieve his bags from the floor. Clasping the plastic handles, he lifted.

Jungkook gave a little shrug and started up the stairs. He hadn’t intended to look back; he didn’t want to give the omega the satisfaction. But when the omega released a shocking gasp, shortly followed by a tumbling sound Jungkook couldn’t resist glancing over his shoulder. Releasing a light snicker, Jungkook looked over the omega with torn bags in his hands and discarded groceries on the floor around his feet. The carton of eggs had opened and cracked. The orange juice was pooling in a puddle, soaking the remaining groceries that had been left intact.

The omega sighed in defeat and kneeled to the ground. Carefully, he began to repack the fallen groceries into the few bags that hadn’t ripped. The knees of his jeans were getting soaked from the orange juice. Slowly the omega glanced upwards to the alpha standing in the stairway. “Aren’t you going to help?” he asked in a small voice.

For a moment, Jungkook’s alpha pulled at the want to assist. “Help, help the omega. Omega needs you.” But Jungkook fought hard against the words. Instead he replied with “I thought you said you didn’t need my help.” It was childish and Jungkook knew it.

Blondie’s gaze snapped into an intense glare, shot directly at Jungkook. The decline for assistance seemed to piss the omega off. The tips of his ears began to glow red with anger. The omega mumbled a few words of disbelief, and possibly some swear words.

Jungkook held back a low snicker. Maybe that’ll teach the omega to be so rude to an alpha. These things had a way of coming back to bite you in the ass. You are rude when offered help? Well, next time you need it the help might not be available.

Fumbling around the floor, the omega reached for something. Clasping the small product in his palm he threw with all his might tossing the item angrily in Jungkook’s direction. “Stupid jerk!” he hissed letting his hand fall in defeat.

Jungkook quickly raised his fist and grabbed the grocery item just before it hit him square in the face. The omega had fairly good aim. If Jungkook hadn’t had such quick reflexes it would’ve likely hit him with good force. Jungkook, still standing on the step, twisted the item in his hand. He let out a low chuckle as he held up the mini bottle for the omega to view. “Banana milk. My favourite.” Turning back towards the stairs he began his climb, leaving the omega to collect the grocery items on his own. “Thanks for the milk!” he called over his shoulder.

The alpha was still laughing as he reached the seventh floor where his apartment was located. Distracted by the banana milk in hand, the alpha nearly walked straight into a teenage boy as he rounded the corner. Once again, Jungkook was putting his quick reflexes to the test. He stepped aside quickly, dodging the teen just in time.

“I’m sorry” Jungkook apologized quickly. He glanced up at the slender teen with deep-set dimples and fire red hair. The alpha got a slight sniff of the light cherry aroma hanging in the air. The boy had yet to present but Jungkook could already sense he was set to be an omega. “I wasn’t paying attention.”

“It’s alright,” the teen answered with a small voice. He shifted his weight slightly, lifting his arms into a better position. It was then that Jungkook noticed the bundle of a small pup balanced on the teen’s hip. “You must be the new neighbor.”

“Jeon Jungkook” the alpha smiled warmly and gave a small bow. “I am. I live right there” he stated, pointing over the teen’s shoulder to his door near the end of the hall. “You live on this floor too?” Jungkook could be polite, especially towards those younger than him. He had a soft spot for little brothers.

“Yeah, first on the right” the teen nodded in the direction of his front door. Shifting slightly, he lifted the pup higher into his arms. He appeared to be struggling under the weight. “I’m Kang Taehyun.” the boy gave a bow to his head, unable to offer up much more in the form of a greeting.

“Pleasure to meet you, Taehyun” Jungkook offered another warm smile. He glanced at the sleeping little pup in his arms. “Is he your little brother?” he asked curiously.

“Ah,” Taehyun answered nervously with a small shake of his head. The teen appeared to have a difficult time maintaining eye contact with the alpha – which Jungkook found adorable. Jungkook knew he was handsome, but it was always cute to notice the nervousness of young omegas and teens when in his presence. “No. I’m babysitting. This is Seokjoon.”

“He’s my brother,” a little voice sounded from behind Taehyun’s legs. An equally small boy peeked his head around the teen. He had shaggy brown hair that was tousled from a busy day of playing outside.

Getting a good look at the two boys, Jungkook was quick to notice the pups were twins. “Oh? Seokjoon is your brother?” Jungkook asked bending at the knee to kneel by the boy. When the boy gave a firm nod, Jungkook asked warmly “And what’s your name?”

The pup glanced up nervously at Taehyun. His deep eyes were wide with concern and a lack of trust. Taehyun offered an encouraging nod and smile. “It’s alright” Taehyun spoke gently. “You can answer him.” The teen couldn’t be any older than sixteen, but he held so much maturity on his shoulders.

“Taemin.” the pup answered in a small voice. He raised his little hand and gently stuck his thumb in his mouth. A nervous habit the pup had developed recently. Taehyun had been quick to notice the action and gently patted Taemin’s hand as a reminder to stop. The pup quickly removed his thumb and forced himself to stand taller – like the big boy he longed to be. “Banana milk?” the boy asked with wide eyes.

Jungkook glanced down at the drink still pressed firmly in his hand. “Ah, yeah” he answered. It really was his favourite drink. He would always have one every night. It was soothing, reminded him of when he was home in Busan with his parents. “You like banana milk?” he asked.

“Love it” Taemin asked with a soft tone. His eyes locked with the drink and watched it longingly.

The alpha held back a sigh as his heart tugged at the sight. His internal alpha started to coo at the sight “he a pup. Give him milk. Pups need milk.” The paternal instincts in the alpha temporarily pulled through. This was uncommon for Jungkook. He had been around children before. But rarely had his alpha tugged at his thoughts in regards to pups and their caregiving. “Do you want it?” Jungkook found himself asking as he held the little bottle out to the boy.

Taemin glanced happily up at the babysitter, searching for permission. Taehyun looked like he was going to deny the offer, not wanting to bother the alpha more than they already had. However when he caught sight of the little boy’s eager eyes he nodded in agreement. Taemin cheered lightly and gave a small clap. “Yes, please” he answered the alpha. The pup had now stepped forward, coming out from behind the teen’s legs.

“So polite” the alpha noted. Jungkook was impressed with the pup’s manners. His eomma had clearly been raising him well. The alpha held out the bottle for the little boy to take. The pup happily accepted it, spinning in a cute little circle of joy.

Jungkook withheld a small chuckle from the cuteness. “What have you got there?” Jungkook questioned. His slender finger pointed to the children’s bouncy ball on the floor by Taemin’s feet.

“Soccer ball.” Taemin answered, puffing his chest out proudly.

The alpha held back a little coo, feeling his heart melt at the adorableness. It was far from being a standard soccer ball. But certainly to the pup it was the ball he was bound to kick around in the park. “A soccer ball?” Jungkook stated in excitement. He pushed himself off the floor and took a step down the hallway. “Show me what you’ve got!” When the pup looked at him confused Jungkook added, “pass me the ball.”

Taemin smiled and stepped forward, eager to kick the little ball. Taehyun mumbled a little nervously, glancing between Jungkook and Taemin “I don’t know if that’s a good idea…” but the teen didn’t have much force behind his words.

Jungkook carelessly waved the concern away with a smile. “Don’t worry about it. There’s nothing here to break.” With a quick wink the alpha added, “and if anything happens I’ll take the blame for it.”

The teenager appeared to be apprehensive of the entire thing, hesitating to agree. But with a deep sigh he caved and stepped back. Moving closer to the wall, he held onto the second pup. “Keep it down” Taehyun ordered, glancing down at the boy in his arms as a nonverbal cue.

“Of course” Jungkook nodded in agreement. Setting his package of ramen down, he moved down the hallway. “Okay. Give me your best kick.”

Taemin pulled back his small leg and released it with force. Sending the ball coming towards Jungkook, it veered to the left. It would’ve missed the alpha completely but he just barely stopped it in time. The pup certainly had power behind his kick. Taemin looked down to the floor with shame.  

“Try again.” Jungkook encouraged. Lightly, he passed the ball back towards the pup. Ultimately Taemin fumbled with accepting the pass and knocked it towards the side. With a gasp, the pup chased after the ball to retrieve it. Jungkook watched in awe. He didn’t often find pups adorable, they were more of a nuisance to him. However, this little one with a determined set to his round eyes and puffy cheeks was Jungkook’s definition of cute.

Taemin held the ball in his little hands. He glanced in Jungkook’s direction. There was a hint of shame and sadness on his face from missing the pass. But Jungkook smiled comfortingly and lightly offered, “Go ahead. Try again.” With a nod, Taemin set the ball on the floor. Nibbling on his bottom lip he went to give it a strong kick, but missed it completely. His leg swung and hit the empty air. The pup sighed in defeat.

“You got it,” Jungkook stated. His alpha was pulling from the inside. The vanilla and milk scent had turned sad, a clear sign of the pup’s emotions. The alpha wanted to reach out and comfort him. “Pup. Pup is sad. Go help pup. Pup needs comfort. Pup needs alpha.” but a hug wasn’t going to fix it. Maybe it’ll please the pup in the moment, but the problem would still be present next time he decided to play. It was better to teach the pup how to properly pass and kick. Jungkook offered a warm smile. “Eye on the ball. Watch it. Kick it.”

The pup sighed softly but nonetheless he followed the alpha’s orders. Tilting his little head downwards he kept his gaze on the ball. Pulling his leg back, he gave another firm kick – flinching slightly in pain from the force. This time he hit the ball – sending it towards Jungkook. However the ball went towards the side again. Taemin let out a defeated whimper. Stomping his foot angrily he crossed his arms over his small chest and pouted. His large eyes grew wider as they filled with a mix of sad and angry tears.

Taehyun stepped forward, his own scent souring at seeing the pup in distress. He had been intent on comforting the child. But much to his surprise, Jungkook had beat him to it.

Jungkook stepped forward quickly. He approached the pup and knelt down before him. “I bet your little toes hurt.” Jungkook spoke gently. Reaching forward, he teasingly tapped the tip of the pup’s foot. The boy gave a light sniffle and a small nod of his head. “You are so strong!” Jungkook stated with excitement and pride – hoping it might cheer up the little pup. “But you don’t kick a ball with your toes. That’s why it hurt,” Jungkook explained. Reaching forward, the alpha ran his hand along the inside of Taemin’s right foot. “Right here is where you kick the ball,” he explained gently. “It’ll go straight and it won’t hurt.”

Taemin gave a small nod of understanding. But his pout remained on his face. The tears that gathered in his eyes had begun to fall silently. “I can’t do it,” he said weakly. “Me no good.” He let out another whimper of sadness.

Jungkook’s heart felt a small pang. This little guy was just too sweet for his own good. Gently using his thumb Jungkook wiped away the stray tears that rolled down his cheek. “You can’t do it now ” Jungkook stated softly. “But you can do it soon.”

The pup looked down at his feet and shuffled lightly. “I only fail,” he said in a broken voice.

“You only fail when you stop trying” Jungkook replied to the boy carefully. Wiping away another row of tears he then moved his hands up to push back the pup’s dark locks – ruffling them affectionately. “Keep trying. You’ll get better” he tried to encourage again. But the pup just didn’t seem to feel better. Taemin’s scent was still filled with sadness. “Hey. I couldn’t kick a ball either at your age” Jungkook tried to go another route.

“But you’re alpha” Taemin whispered. Finally pulling his eyes away from the floor, he locked gazes with the man. His little eyes shone with wonder and fear.

“Alpha, beta,omega, it doesn’t matter,” Jungkook explained. “We all need to practice, we all need to learn and be taught.” Lightly he patted Taemin on the shoulder and beamed a smile. “Give it a try. Kick right here” Jungkook patted the inside of Taemin’s foot. Standing up, Jungkook backed away from the child. “Come on. Try. Give it a try” Jungkook beamed brightly.

Taemin glanced between Jungkook and the ball placed before him. The pup appeared to be deciding if it was worth it or not. Finally he gave into the temptation and lightly kicked the ball with the inside of his foot. The force wasn’t there as it was before – clearly being a halfhearted kick. But it went straight. The ball came directly towards the alpha, rolling to a stop in front of Jungkook’s feet. Taemin’s eyes widened with surprise. He looked down at the ball before turning his face up towards the alpha.

“You did it!” Jungkook cheered a little too loudly. Then, with excitement, he stretched out his arms. This was meant to be a sign of joy or celebration. But Taemin appeared to take it otherwise. The pup came running forward, laughing brightly. All tears had long been forgotten. Stretching out his own arms the pup jumped into Jungkook’s embrace.

The alpha barely had enough time to register the pup’s want for a hug. With a deep gasp, the alpha accepted the force of the small child. Without much hesitation, Jungkook lifted the boy into his arms and balanced him on his hip. He chuckled lightly at the sight of  the boy’s puffy smiling cheeks. “I did it!” the boy announced.

“Yes you did” Jungkook answered, his hand slowly gliding up and down the child’s back. He couldn’t remember the last time a pup ever came running at him for a hug – in fact he wasn’t certain it had ever happened before. He bounced the boy softly. Adding a gentle “and I am so proud of you.”

His internalized alpha was howling with joy. The wolf was practically wagging his tag with emotions. “Happy pup. Pup is happy. We get hugs. Pup hugs the best” the wolf was bouncing around. “Vanilla and milk. So sweet. Nice scent. I like it.”

Jungkook hadn’t registered the pup’s actions until the wolf had made the scent comment. Jungkook was quickly engulfed in the aroma of sweet vanilla and calming milk. It was the scent of a pup. Taemin was nuzzling his little nose against the alpha’s scent glands along his neck. Unintentionally Jungkook had responded to the action by releasing his own chocolate pheromones.

“We opposite” Taemin mumbled, pulling back slightly so that he could speak. However, the pup ensured he left his head resting on the alpha’s shoulder, melting into the warm embrace.

Jungkook nuzzled his nose on the pup’s head. “Hmm?” he questioned curiously. He was confused as to what the pup had meant by that.

“You chocolate. Me vanilla” the pup explained with a little giggle. “I like chocolate.”

Jungkook’s heart wanted to break in that moment. He thanked the moon goddess that he hadn’t had that extra smoke on the way home from the store like he had originally wanted. He couldn’t bear it if he passed on second hand smoke to the child through his scent glands. He also couldn’t remember the last time anyone had said they liked his chocolate scent. Sure, he heard the occasional comment from an omega that the scent was nice or sweet – or even the odd time someone said they didn’t mind it. But for someone to confidently say they liked it, he had never experienced that.

“Our scent. He likes our scent. Pup likes our scent. Pup!” the alpha was jumping around again with an overwhelming amount of happiness.

“And I like vanilla” Jungkook offered softly as a reply. Jungkook would likely have said more. But it was in that moment that his omega neighbor had finally come out through the stairway door. With a sigh Jungkook set the pup down. He would rather not have another run in with the angry omega. Two arguments a day was Jungkook’s limit. “I need to go,” he told the pup. When the child pouted, Jungkook chuckled lightly. Reaching down he ruffled the boy’s hair lightly. “I’ll see you around,” he promised. Stepping back, he went to receive his bag. “Bye Min-Min” Jungkook gave a small wave.

“Bye Kookie” Taemin answered with a tiny wave of his own.

Jungkook had fumbled with his keys before stepping inside his cold empty apartment. Just as he was closing the door he heard a soft voice mumble “sorry I took so long…” the rest faded away as the alpha shut the door.

“Pup was nice” the internal alpha was padding on the floor longingly. It was pushing Jungkook to return to the hallway. “We have pup. Lets have pup.”

Jungkook froze mid step. He couldn’t have heard that right. There was no possible way that’s what the alpha had stated within his mind. Jungkook had never put much thought into him having pups. In the past the idea arose when his eomma would mention the want for grandchildren – having long since given up on Jungkook’s free spirited brother in settling down. However, most recently Jungkook had come to not only realize, but also accept, that the possibility of having pups would never be in the cards for him.

These thoughts and knowledge of Jungkook’s ultimate lack of pups in the future came from two pieces of knowledge. The first of which was the obvious challenge of his scent. The chocolate scent sufficed for one night stands. It was intriguing and had a certain way of catching omega’s attention and curiosity. However none had been willing to stake a claim in the long run. Omegas longed to be protected and fought for and guided – all of these attributes were tied in with the mentality of a deep woodsy or spicy aroma. The longest an omega had put up with the alpha was about three months – although those months had been far from ideal.

The second reason Jungkook knew for certain that pups weren’t a possibility for him were based on the diagnosis he received. Ever since he had presented as an alpha, Jungkook had experienced excruciating ruts. The s****l tension built up and regardless of the amount of knots Jungkook produced, he just couldn’t be relaxed. It was often a painful experience – one that he hated to know was coming. 

In desperation, Jungkook went in search of a rut specialist – having found one rut borderline unmanageable. He was tired of missing weeks of schooling due to first the rut, and then the tiring pain that followed. The alpha had hoped he would receive some form of medication. However the diagnosis he received nearly broke him.

The doctor carefully explained to Jungkook that his body was unable to produce a satisfying amount of sperm. His body – and alpha – pushed itself into overdrive in a desperate attempt of producing enough sperm to sire pups. With every rut Jungkook experienced, the alpha would overwork itself. This caused the extreme exhaustion and the painful build-up.

Continuing on, the doctor had tried to reassure Jungkook that there was still a possibility of having pups. But it would take extraordinary effort and circumstances. Jungkook was informed that if he found a mate, one that his alpha truly accepted fully and they were to enter rut and heat simultaneously, it was possible. He learnt that there were possible diets or medications that could increase the chance. There was even a discussion regarding the chances in a female omega versus a male omega. However Jungkook hadn’t heard much past the word sterile. Although pups were a slim possibility, by wolf standards, Jungkook was sterile.

It would take a very extraordinary – or desperate – omega to settle for Jungkook. Because that’s the type of alpha Jungkook knew he was bound to be – the one you settled for.

And that knowledge had almost broken Jungkook. He had gone in search of answers during his freshman year of college, hoping to achieve some form of comfort that made handling ruts during the school year more maintainable. But it had very much gone the opposite way. Having learnt about his inability to conceive pups, Jungkook had felt a piece of him break within. It was from there that he continued downwards, digging his own metaphorical grave. He turned to negative habits as a way of coping – habits that he continued to indulge in until very recently.

No one knew about his medical condition. Jungkook felt so incredibly ashamed that he couldn’t bring himself to rely on the support of others – not even his hyungs. And withstanding the weight on his own only made the pain worsen.