I am Darling

My Lead

I am Darling, I was Invincible. But we had to move fast. The ambulance was running like hell. We almost had an accident following it because Dad just can’t stop crying. Thanks to Daniel he was sitting next to the driver’s seat and took the wheel on its proper position.

As we reached the hospital I stayed in the car and waited for the result of my uncle’s status. I couldn’t feel anything anymore. I was totally numbed that moment. Isabel came back for me but I told her I wanted to stay just for a while. Maybe I was so afraid. Afraid for my uncle’s life. “We are just at the emergency, we’ll be waiting there.. Ok?” She reminded. I just nodded and said, “I’ll follow later.. go.. Uncle Tim needs you.” We hugged each other as tears just couldn’t stop falling. I knew I couldn’t do anything to ease a little, the burden her family because of me and I blamed everything to no one but myself. No one has the right to suffer because of my mistakes in the past. No one had to die again because of me but uncle Tim’s fate is not in our hands.

Isabel went back to the emergency room and I fell asleep in the car. After a few minutes, “Darling.. darling wake up.” Mom woke me up. She sat beside me in the car patting my back and I was eager but so apprehensive to know what the development of my Uncle’s situation was. Then I saw Mom’s tears were rolling down her cheeks. She said “Your Uncle Tim’s gone.” The most unwanted word I always heard from people was “gone”. There again, another pain kept bouncing back on me. I knew it, I had to suffer again. This would never stop, no, never. My eyes were tired, so tired of crying but the hurting lingered as I walked through life. As Mom and I went out of the car going to the emergency room, I felt like the world was on my shoulders. I was shaking to my knees. As we entered the emergency room I saw my family crying. My Dad could hardly catch his breath in tears. Aunt Gracie was hugging the remains of my Uncle, and my cousins were on the bed of their Dad weeping and begging to God. Lamentations were all over the place and I can’t stand the scene. I went out of the room and cried, screamed and howled, “Why are you doing this to me? Here.. here take my life instead, they are innocent people and they don’t deserve this.. get me.. get me instead.. I’m tired of all the pains, if this suffering is not enough then take my life. Get me.. get me…!” I was crying and howling. Everyone in the hospital heard it. I knew he heard it, the man in the hood. He was following my every step and my every move. He was there all this time. I deliberately wanted him to hear that. I wanted him to know I wasn’t afraid of dying. If he came I would be all set. Mom was begging me to stop and Dad was trying to pull me inside the room. “No dad… (I was screaming to death) I wanted this moron to know I am not afraid of him. I know he’s listening, hey wherever you hide, I know you heard me.. I’m gonna get you I’m gonna get you.. just remember that.. you can kill me but I’m gonna hurt you first.. deep.. so deep.. down to your throat, I’m gonna stuck your own knife to your throat!” Then I cried again as hard as I could to lessen at least the weight of my wounded heart. My Aunt came to me and helped me calm down. I hugged her so tight telling her I was so sorry of what I had done to her family. I told, “I am so sorry.. I am so sorry.. Uncle Tim’s gone because of me and I’m gonna bear that for the rest of my life. I will be indebted to you and your family in my lifetime.. I am so sorry, from my heart..” Aunt Gracie was crying so hard but said to me “It’s not your fault dear.. Your uncle Tim loves your family so much and I love you too. There are just so many crazy people in this world and we can’t stop that.” By hearing that, Aunt Gracie encouraged me more to be strong. My cousins also came to me and showed their support. Daniel said, “Dad wanted to help you and that’s what we are going to do.” You will not be alone on this. We are here now, ready to carry your burdens.” “Thank you so much but I don’t want anyone of you to get hurt anymore.” I told them. “No Darling, We are all now into this. We will help.” Christina replied.

We all grieved for Uncle Tim for days. I was so worried about my dad. He never stopped crying since Uncle Tim died in the hospital. He was being comforted by mom and Aunt Gracie during the day we laid him to rest. I just witnessed my dad being so weak that moment and I couldn’t do anything. My heart was so broken seeing my dad that way. He had survived his stabbed wounds but I was afraid this incident would worsen his health.

We stayed in Gatefree City. I didn’t enroll for a moment because I wanted to focus on the cases. If the police couldn’t give us anything I would be the one to provide for myself. I started on Shawwie’s murder. Using Dad’s car Daniel drove for me and Isabel near Shawwie’s apartment. It was also near my school. We asked people around living there if they had seen or heard anything during the murder. Block by block we gathered information and they all had one thing in common, they didn’t hear or see anything. I felt hopeless. I told Daniel and Isabel that we need to separate so we could gather more new details. They went with the car and I told them to come back for me after an hour to where they left me. I decided to go inside Shawwie’s apartment thinking I could find something new.. The place was still under police investigation because that yellow ribbon saying “police line do not cross” was yet in the door before you could enter. I was just looking at the place and feeling the day that Shawwie was murdered in that vicinity. I could imagine how she had suffered from that lawless man and how she begged for her life but that man never listened and took her life. “Do you know the girl?” An old woman was behind me asking if I knew the one being murdered. I was shocked and almost run but I kept my composure. I replied, “Yes, she was my bestfriend and I want to know who did this to her.” The old woman just sighed and walked away but I followed her. “Ma’am please wait, are you from here? Have you seen or heard anything during that night she was murdered? I asked. She kept on walking away and pretended not hearing a word I said. “Ma’am please I have to know, you have to tell me something.” I was begging to her. “If you want a peaceful life, stay away from the case.” She warned. I was beginning to suspect she knew something and it made me more curious about the old woman. “You know something, I know you know something.. please help me. Please.” I said feeling so excited that, at last I found a lead. She turned to me and said in a harsh voice, “Can’t you see it? A lot has suffered enough but it won’t stop til he gets what he wants and it’s you!” “So you know me… oh my God you know me, please help me.” I cried. I desperately wanted to know what she knew. While I was begging I heard the blowing of horn of Daniel’s car and in the wink of an eye the old lady was gone. I ran after her tying to find where she went but she wasn’t there anymore. I lost her and I lost my lead. I told myself that I’m gonna come back there and find her again. Daniel and Isabel were wondering who I was with and why was I running. “I found an old lady. She knew something but she went away. I tried to stop her but she’s gone.” I told them. Isabel said, “She must be afraid to get involved with the case.” Daniel added, “We should come back here again and try to find that old woman. She could be our only lead.” “Yes definitely I’ll come back, she had to tell me something.” I said. “Let’s go?” Daniel asked. “Yeah let’s go.” I replied. In my mind I was troubled of what was the woman was talking about. She knew something but she was holding back. She knew the man in the hood and she knew me. Who was she?

Before going home we dropped by the school and said my hellos and goodbyes to some friends and teachers especially to Jessy and Rhea. I had to stop schooling for the meantime to give way to my own investigation to the cases of my loved ones. I saw Rhea immediately coming out from the clinic. She saw me and came running and said, “I heard about your uncle and I am so sorry. I wasn’t able to come to the wake. I was too busy.” “I understand.” I answered. “Daniel and Isabel.. remember them?” I asked Rhea. “Yes of course, I’m so sorry for your loss.” She said. “We are coping, thank you.” Isabel replied. “I know you didn’t enroll this semester and I was so worried, are you okay now? Rhea asked me. “I just want to focus on the cases first. I can’t concentrate on studies anyway if there are lots of things bothering me. I hope next semester I can come back.” I told her. Daniel was so quiet so I asked him what’s wrong. He told, “I am not feeling so well, I feel dizzy.” School clinic was just steps away so we brought him in. The school nurse has not yet arrived so we had to stay a while. While waiting I asked Rhea if she had seen Jessy in school. “I haven’t seen her since yesterday.” She said. “I hope she’s fine now, she hasn’t been herself lately.” I told her. Rhea left us in the clinic and told us just to wait for the school nurse there. “I have some office work at the Dean’s office so I will leave you here first.” “No problem, we’ll be fine here.” Isabel replied. I was sitting beside Daniel when a certain file in the clinic caught my attention. It was a folder almost hidden inside another folder and it was located at the shelves just beside the nurse’s table. I don’t know why with so many folders on it I just happened to see that file. It was on Gab’s name. Gabby Davies was his real name and it was his file I was staring at. I couldn’t help myself. I asked Isabel to watch out for that door if someone was coming because only the nurse and staff were allowed to see the files of the school clinic. I got it and it stated “Confidential Files”. I opened the page and read “Psychiatric Problem” and Gab’s name was on it. “Someone’s coming.” Isabel said. I took that file and hid it down my shirt. I was really curious. I had to know what Gab’s psychiatric problem was. Had it something to do with his disappearance? Would I face another new mysterious event? I just hope I could carry on.

The nurse has arrived. “Hi Darling how can I help?” She asked. “We just happened to drop by when my cousin here became ill.” I replied. She examined Daniel and gave him some pain reliever. But my mind wasn’t in them. I was thinking of the file I had down my shirt. What was I gonna discover about Gab? Would this file shed light on his disappearance? I was hurrying to go home so I could read the file and I was hoping I could find something valuable.