Estela POV
Explaining death to four-year-olds is almost as difficult as watching Killian drag himself through the coming days in a complete whirlwind, looking more like a zombie than the man I know so well. Every time I tell the pups that Petra is gone and won’t be coming back, the message seems to only sink in for a few hours. Then they start asking when they’ll see Petra again, and I try to explain the concept of permanence to four precious beings who just can’t grasp it.
Still, watching Killian is harder. We’ve gone through the entire preparation for a massive state funeral with great exhaustion and stress, but with little emotion from him. I keep waiting for him to break, for him to snap out of the shock and mourn the way he so desperately needs to. That hasn’t happened yet, and I
