Indiscreet Box Set

Chapter 10

Brian watched the young doctor approach with trepidation.

He had a thick file folder with him and looked serious. Brian felt a bit fuzzy around the edges, but thought he was doing much better than he was when he first arrived. “Hi, doctor,” he said.

“Before you ask me, it is Friday, August 21, 2010. My name is Brian Murphy and right now, I don’t know where I live because my landlady’s goons just beat the s**t out of me.”

Harris laughed. “Well, Brian, my name is Greg Harris. I am a doctor and I am here because of your medical records. I need to ask you some questions. It’s okay if you can’t remember, and there is no danger of you being kept here because of the answers, although I already know that I will recommend you see a counselor after you are discharged.”

“I don’t know if I can afford to do that,” Brian answered.

“Your insurance covers psychological consults under the company’s current plan. Mr. Drummond told me there is also no deductible or co-pay required from the client. You do not need to construct your answers because you are afraid of what a counselor might charge. So, will you be straight with me?” asked Greg as he pulled a chair up to the bed.

“I’m not in the habit of lying, Dr. Harris. I find lies repugnant, no matter the reason or circumstance.”

“Good. Then we can approach this topic head-on. However, I am warning you, you will find some of the questions painful and as a result, try to convince yourself I really don’t need to know the answer. I also have information in your file from prior visits to this hospital. Before you decide not to cooperate, consider that I prepared these questions after I went over your chart, your medical records, and spoke to those people who witnessed the aftermath. Based on that information, I formulated my questions.”

“I’m not afraid of pain, Dr. Harris, physical or emotional.”

“All right, let’s begin. What happened to you just before your sixth birthday?” Greg asked as he began to make notes on his high-end PDA. Greg asked his questions in a rapid fire staccato.

He didn’t want Brian to consider his answers, he needed Brian’s answers to be spontaneous.

Harris’ PDA fascinated Brian, but he responded immediately to the man’s soft voice. “Brian…?”

“My dad died. We were playing catch in the yard and he had a heart attack.”

“Were you very close to your dad?”

“He was my best friend. I haven’t been that close to anyone since he passed away.”

“Mr. Drummond seems to care about you. Do you feel close to him?”

“Dr. Harris, is that question necessary for your evaluation?”

“Why do you ask?”

“Because the question is an invasion of my privacy and I don’t want to answer it.” Without the backboard and cervical collar, Brian began to fidget.

“I do see your point. Unfortunately, I think the question and its answer are very important to the evaluation. Although I can assure you that your answer is privileged and under Doctor/Patient confidentiality laws. I cannot discuss our conversation with anyone unless you give your express permission. Look, how about this, I’ll trade secrets with you.”

Brian looked at Dr. Harris as if he saw some loose screws.

“One more question and then it’s your turn to spill.”

Brian dickered. “Why are you asking me this question?”

“I’m asking because a future with Mr. Drummond in it may depend on your honesty and trust now,” Greg answered seriously.

“I’m in love with him.” Brian sighed as the tears began to trickle down his cheek. “But it’s an impossible situation, because I have nothing to offer.”

“You have yourself, Brian, and somehow I think that to Donald Drummond, that is enough. Now, just to show you I keep my word, I’m also gay and in love with Dr. de Loria, unfortunately Dr. de Loria doesn’t even see me.”

Brian’s expressive eyes showed sympathy. “Okay Greg, I’ll keep your secrets and you keep mine.”

“Well, Brian, let’s begin again. How did your mother take your father’s death?” Harris asked.

“She blamed me. He was quite a bit older than she was and she thought I was a burden to him.”

Harris tapped his pencil on the computer screen. “Were you a burden?”

“I don’t think so. He always came to me to play. I didn’t ask him because Mom told me not to bother him. I was a pretty solitary kid.”

“Do you remember being brought to the hospital just after your sixth birthday with a compound fracture in your arm? You bear the scar just a handhold below the elbow.”

Brian looked down at this arm. “You know, I never knew what happened to me. I asked and neither my mother nor my aunt would answer me. I have dreams, but I can’t seem to retain the information when I am awake. In one of them, I am on the floor with a broken arm and the bone is peeking out of my shirt. I began to remember details when you started asking questions. Before that, all I drew was a blank.”

“That’s because your subconscious mind was trying to protect you from additional emotional trauma. In your case, I believe that the attack tonight broke a psychological dam behind which you stored your childhood memories. In most cases, I would suggest we hypnotize you or have you remember more of it gradually on your own. However, this is a special circumstance.”

Harris opened the file on his lap. “I don’t like having to be the one to show you these, but you have the right to know, and at this point it is a medical necessity. A trauma like the one you had tonight will bring more flashbacks. You need to be able to deal with them in context.”

Greg passed Brian a series of Polaroid shots taken by the ER over a period of about six years. In one of the shots, a much younger Francisco de Loria, in surgical garb, was putting Brian’s arm in a cast. Brian said nothing, just stoically shuffled the pictures until he had studied each one.

“I guess I’ve met Dr. de Loria before.” Brian stared blankly past Harris to the doctor having an animated conversation with Bear. He will be forever Bear in my mind and heart now that I know.

Brian closed his eyes for a moment and then looked up at Dr. Harris.

“I’d say you knew Cisco long before I did,” Harris replied, looking out at Francisco from underneath his lashes.

“Not really, because I can’t remember ever meeting him before tonight,” Brian answered.

The lack of emotional response to the pictures worried Harris, both professionally and personally. Brian was in emotional lockdown and that was a difficult thing to overcome. He found himself liking Brian, concerned about his welfare, and he wanted to continue to work with him.

Brian spoke, “I remember the shirt with the pearl buttons.

Dad bought it for me for my birthday right before he died. I had a set of cap guns, a double holster, a cowboy hat and boots.

He even mentioned riding lessons. My mother, as I recall, was not thrilled with the cap guns. They were too noisy and would prevent my father from getting the rest he needed.”

“Was your father ill?” Greg asked carefully.

“My mother said he was under a lot of stress trying to care for her and Mary, and I only added to it. She didn’t want me. I’ve always known that.”

“How do you feel about that, being blamed for your father’s death at the age of six? Not being welcome in your own home must have been traumatic, to say nothing of the mental anguish of finding out your mother took out her frustration at becoming a widow on you both mentally and physically?”

“I’m a trained submissive, Greg. Do you know what that means?”

“I’m familiar with the lifestyle.”

“My first Dom was my college roommate, Alan. He said I was a natural, because I could drop into subspace instantly. I believe I just found out why. Subspace was safe, Greg. Reality was not.”

“What do you want to do about this? From what I understand, you have been expending all of your resources to take care of a woman who almost beat you to death.”

“My father told me I had to care for my family and I won’t let him down. I think he had premonitions of his own death, which is why he insisted that Mom have a child who could care for her when he passed.”

“Essentially, you are telling me that your father trained you to be his replacement should something happen to him,” Greg said in a hard voice.

“I suppose he did. At least, to Dad, I was useful and had a purpose. Everyone else I have ever cared about threw me out with the trash when they no longer needed what I offered. Now, I have nothing to offer anyone. Who wants a boy who has to take care of a schizophrenic mother? I had plans to put her in an assisted living facility. But if she is prone to violence, I’ll have to rethink that.

“I’d appreciate copies of my childhood records so that I can take them to both her psychiatrist and her counselor. I am sure he is unaware of this. She is living in Allentown with my aunt and sees someone out of Princeton.”

“You seem to have no emotional reaction to this at all, Brian. Why?”

“I’m sorry I can’t breakdown on cue, but I’ll cope. I always have.” Brian turned his head away from Greg.

“I hear resignation in your voice. What is it you have resigned yourself to?”

“Doctor Harris.” Brian’s voice held a tinge of bitterness.

“You have just informed me that I’m a psychological wreck. I just fell in love. Your report here makes any relationship, right now, impossible. f**k right now, maybe forever.” Brian raised his voice in anger to Greg Harris’ relief. He thought he was going to have to hospitalize Brian on suicide watch.

“You should understand this, you have your own dreams. If I would have been a financial burden to Bear Drummond, prior to this, now I am a psychological risk. I know that bipolar disorder and schizophrenia are inherited traits. I wasn’t good enough for him before, now I’m toxic. This means I need to not only find a new job, I need a new life, and it’s not the kind of life I was dreaming about,” Brian finished, trembling with anger and frustration, wiping his face with his shirtsleeve. Greg was about to counter his assumptions when he heard a noise.

Brian also heard the noise, opened his eyes and looked up at the door. There was Bear Drummond in all his glory. Brian had had enough. He flung the pictures back at Harris, an unthinkable action had he been in his right mind, turned his head into the pillow and mumbled, “Will you please thank Mr. Drummond for his kindness and tell him to go home, Greg.”

“Dr. Harris, could you give us a moment,” Bear asked softly.

“Yes, Mr. Drummond, but only a moment,” Greg Harris answered as he left the room.

“Brian, did you think to ask me if I thought you would be a burden? I don’t think you comprehend what happened to me this afternoon, baby.”

Bear Drummond stood at the door of the room with his hands in his pockets. He looked tired and the lines on his forehead and around his mouth stood out prominently against his tanned skin.

The man who only this afternoon looked like he stepped out of an ad in GQ, was rumpled, his hair uncombed, his tie askew and his face ashen under the tan. The green eyes were tired and desolate. Brian shuddered. He caused this. He turned away.

“Look at me,” Bear commanded. Brian reluctantly opened his eyes as Bear walked toward him. “You weren’t the only man who plunged down the rabbit hole this morning. I went down as soon as I laid eyes on your beautiful face. After lunch, I knew.”

“Knew what, Mr. Drummond?” Brian asked in a soft, barely audible tone.

Bear sat down on the chair beside the bed and took Brian’s cold hand in his own. Brian tried to pull back, but Bear would not let go.

“I knew that you were mine. Mine. My forever boy and the boy I have searched for endlessly but did not find until he spilled a bottle of 1985 Bordeaux on my Persian rug. From that moment on, I didn’t care about the rug, the wine, or even the business.

All I ever wanted and dreamed about stood before me. I wanted to reach out and grab with both hands. I didn’t, that was my mistake, Brian. That mistake cost you pain. There will be no more pain, baby. If you tell me you don’t want me, I will leave and I will never bother you again. But I don’t think that is what either of us desire.”

“Mr. Drummond…”

“You call me Papa Bear or Bear. There is no Mr. Drummond or Boss between us now. It is just you and I. I love you, boy, and I have never said that to a single soul, only you. Give us a chance. Come to my home and recuperate. We will deal with your mother, and whatever else comes up, together. Please, don’t make me beg. Please.”

Brian took his hand away from Bear’s and ran it through Bear’s hair, smiling, and as he looked into Bear’s eyes, he said, “I believe you’ve just made me an offer that I can’t refuse. Could you kiss me, Sir?”

Bear moved from the chair on to the bed and sat beside his boy. “Can I hold you, or are you in too much pain?”

“They gave me something for the pain.” Brian’s eyes were bright with unshed tears again. He reached out and Bear pulled him against his rock hard chest. Bear covered his face with light butterfly kisses, stroking down his arms, nuzzling his nose in Brian’s hair, and blowing in his ear.

“It is very late, baby. Jim Boy is going to spend the remainder of the night with you. In the morning, I will pick you up and we will go home. Don’t worry about your things. Reed and I will pick them up from that James witch. You never have to see that place again. We can take care of your mother in a few days when you feel more like yourself. Now sleep, baby. I will stay here and hold you until you do. When you wake up, Jim Boy will be here to call me so I can take you home.”

About a half-hour later, Brian began to doze off and Bear moved away and off the bed. He sat down in the chair and gathered up the photos Brian had strewn over the floor. The sight of the child who was his Brian horrified him. Photo after photo of burns, broken bones, bruised face, welts on his back and legs, Bear had to put the pictures down before he spit up his guts. From the age of six to the age of twelve, his mother had treated him worse than a stray dog. Bear recognized whip marks and bites, his head infected with lice and his body encrusted with dirt. Bear went over to the door and found Jim waiting.

Silently, he handed the entire file to Jim. “Can you stay with him? I will be back to bring him out to the farm early tomorrow morning.”

“Of course, Sir, Master Reed has put me at your disposal. He said to call him when you were ready. He’s at the club.”

“If he wakes, Jim, feel him out about what he wants to do about his…that…” Bear winced almost as if he could not even enunciate the word, “…woman who bore him.”

* * * *

Cisco grabbed Bear as he passed the nursing station. “I already know,” Bear said flatly. “And yes, I can see your concern for my welfare and his. We will get through this thing.”

“About the mother…” Cisco said.

“Do not ever, in my presence, use that honorable and respectful word in conjunction with that woman,” Bear thundered.

“Bear, hold on. I am not the enemy here. I want you to know that she is dangerous, especially to Brian. She will have to be medically supervised at all times.”

“It’s good he has me, then, I can afford it and everything else the b***h needs. However, I will not let my boy be her physical or emotional punching bag ever again. I’m leaving, but I will be back to take him home in the morning. Jim Boy will stay with him tonight. I have to go to get his things and then go to the stationhouse.” Bear straightened his tie. “Anything else you care to add?”

“Just be careful out there.”

* * * *

Bear sat in his SUV, which one of Reed’s bouncers had driven to the hospital. He spoke to the phone. “Reed, club,” he said. The telephone automatically dialed Reed’s private line.

“I’m in the parking lot. Jim Boy is sitting with Brian for the rest of the night. I have to call Maria, but I’ll be at the James flophouse in fifteen, maybe twenty minutes.”

“We’ll be there.”

“You don’t have to meet me. It may get messy.”

“I’ll have your back as always, just as you always have mine. I’ll bring some of the boys in case we have an unexpected party but don’t insult me by asking me to stay away.”

“Okay. I wanted to keep you out of this for Jim’s sake.”

“Believe me, Jim may be a bit of a pouf, but well, let’s say he can handle whatever is thrown his way. I’ll see you in fifteen.”

The other end of the line stayed silent. The new cell phones annoyed Bear. There was no click to say someone had hung up, and he never knew if the conversation was over or paused. He decided for him, at least, it was over.

Bear said, “Home.” It rang a few times and the excitable voice of his housekeeper, Mrs. Maria Santore, answered. She and her family helped care for his home. The farm, overlooking Route 29 and the Delaware River, had about twenty acres and outbuildings surrounding his house. It was enough for him to keep a few horses, have a pond, and separate living quarters for the Santore family.

“You didn’t come home for dinner, Donald, and you didn’t call. That is not like you. What happened?”

He spoke to Momma Maria, as would any of her sons. “There was a bit of a dust-up at work and, Maria, I met someone.”

“The cause of the fuss, I presume. You never take the easy road.” Maria sighed. Bear could see her in his mind. Short and round, engulfed in a white apron with her wooden spoon. “So, son of my heart, finally, you come to your senses after Antonio, eh? It is about time. What do you know of this one? Is he a good boy?”

“Mama, Maria, he is almost too good. He has near broken himself trying to take care of his invalid mother. Maria, look.

Tomorrow morning, I’m going to have my new friend come stay with me. I expect he will become in time…” Donald hesitated, then dove in, “…my partner, err…husband. Please prepare the rooms adjoining my own. I’m sorry for the short notice, but I expect he will be very tired and a little off-center. He was badly injured. He is still a bit wary, so don’t say or do anything to scare him. Try not to expect too much. Cisco said he had a moderate concussion and he may have lingering effects for a few weeks.”

“Mr. Donald, as if I would come between you and any happiness the good Lord is fit to bestow. No one deserves someone more than you do. What time will you arrive? I’ll make sure all will be ready when you get back.”

“Maria, as I said, he’s hurt. He was worked over by some of Estelle James’ boys. I think we will be there by ten, depending what Cisco says about his care and how long it takes to get him ready to leave.”

“What did Dr. de Loria say about his health?” Maria asked.

“Like I said, Momma, he has a moderate concussion and he is malnourished. His beautiful face is black and blue. He also has a few cracked ribs,” Donald answered.

“Are you all right? Who did this?”

He had long since given up refusing to answer Maria’s questions. She was as wily as a KGB agent. Then, if he didn’t spill the goods, he would find his comfort level significantly affected for weeks after until he ‘fessed’ up. It was simpler to spill his guts at the onset.

“I believe the James boys were hired to rough him up due to the incident at work. It involved Zeke Robbins.”

“Zeke Robbins is dangerous. I’ve warned you for years…why you ever hired him at…”

“Mama, I’m almost there. Please, I know what you said, and could you save it for later?”

“You aren’t respectful, Donald, but I’ll forgive you this time.

Do you need Salvatore or Junior to come over and assist you?

Hah! I spit on Estelle James. How a round-heeled w***e could dare to challenge you…Bear, Pop and I will have everything ready.

I’ll take care of it. He will have both breakfast and a comfortable bed waiting. You go, now. Take your whip to that James woman.”

Bear could hear her shouts to Junior and Salvatore, along with her colorful description of Estelle James’ round heels.

He chuckled. It took five minutes for his demeanor to turn to icy rage. Reed was in his black Jag, waiting for him in front of the house. The sight of the bloodstain on the sidewalk pooled under the streetlight made Bear very quiet. A quiet Bear was a dangerous Bear.

Bear and Reed stepped out of their vehicles, reaching the door at exactly the same instant, as if they were the stars of a synchronized ballet. Bull Raleigh and three bouncers followed.

Bear had his bullwhip coiled in his hand and ready to strike.

He pounded on the door, shouting, “Lady, you better come to this door right now, or I am going to call the cops to this house and we both know what they are going to find here.” The door opened a crack.

“What you going after an ole lady for, eh, Miz Rich b***h?”

Estelle James hissed from behind the door, “Somebody didn’t play nice with Buttercup?” Estelle cackled.

The hard crack of a whip reverberated through the night air.

“Do I have your attention now, Estelle?”

“You think you be using that on my body, you be a dead man.

My boys will…”

“…be sitting in a holding cell at the stationhouse, about to be charged with aggravated assault and attempted murder. If I even so much as smell one of your hoodlums near anything of mine—and Brian is mine, make no mistake about that—they will see some accidents of their own.

“Now, you listen to me woman, because I do not intend to repeat myself. You step the f**k aside. I am going to follow your whorish ass up those steps, and you are going to show me where Brian Murphy lived.” He signaled to Joey, one of the bouncers.

“This gentleman is going to put everything Brian owns into these nice clean boxes. You are going to write on every box that you supervised the packing and each box contains only articles that belong to Brian Murphy. This gentleman,” Bear pointed to Bull, “is going to watch you to make sure you don’t cause any accidents.

“I want every article of clothing, every knick-knack, every single item belonging to Brian Murphy in one of these boxes and on this porch in less than thirty minutes, or I am on the phone.”

Bear proceeded to follow her in the door and silently put his whip back underneath the suit jacket where it sat looped on his belt.

“b***h, if you happen to forget anything, I will be on that well-worn ass of yours like flies on s**t. Cross me, and I will make you wish you were never born. So, do not bother giving me any sass. Now, show my man where he lived. On second thought we can pack up his stuff. I would not want your filthy hands on it.”

Mr. Bear Drummond walked up four flights of stairs, down the hall strewn with needles and cigarette butts, and prayed for his boy. When the old b***h unlocked the room, it looked to be more like a cell. The bed under the window had a quilt that appeared recently washed, if it was not for the fresh red stains of his boy’s blood. It was at least one hundred degrees in the room.

He saw the small plastic cooler and the single can of Coke left empty, turned on its side.

The sheets were clean, the closet and the drawers lined with plastic and shelf paper. He would have done the same if he had to live in this pigsty. Bull got all of Brian’s things into a box, taped it up efficiently, and skillfully tossed the box to Joey. Bear saw him eye the kid’s tattered suitcase, and Bull instructed Joey to take it downstairs with the boxes. Estelle James signed the box, just as he asked.

Bear almost punched the wall when he saw all the boy had was one pitiful box, a suitcase, a quilt, some sheets, two towels, and a pair of bolsters.

“All that fuss for one box and a crappy suitcase, Ms. Fancy Pants.” Estelle baited.

Joey came back up the stairs and asked, “Anything else, Sir?”

Bear motioned to the two bolsters and Joey grabbed them and took them down. When they were through, Donald asked, “How much do you charge for this rat’s nest, Estelle? I have seen prison cells with finer appointments.”

“I charge me two hundred dollars a week. I takes a two week deposit and don’t ask no questions. Therefore, it is a bargain for both parties.

Why, you interested?”

“You don’t want to know what’s going to become interesting to me, Estelle.”

“Are you threatening me ‘cause of your booty boy, Miz Rich b***h?”

Like lightning, Bear’s whip cracked to the left of Estelle’s face.

“You want to keep your face, but then, why should you? You were arranging to have my boy’s face cut. I am not going to forget that, Estelle. I will forget nothing about this incident. I know it is a waste of my time to try to train such an ignorant, round-heeled b***h in basic courtesy. Even so, a little respect would not come amiss.”

“That is a threat I hear, you Bugger Man.” The whip cracked again and left a welt bleeding on her right cheek. Estelle James let out a loud whine. Her face set in mulish stubbornness as she glared at Bear.

“No, Estelle. As you see, I am not threatening you. I am promising you that your life will be too miserable to live if something happens to either my boy or myself. If anyone, no matter who, comes after either my boy or me, I will go after your boney ass.”

Reed, who had been silent throughout the conversation, chimed in, “What’s worse, Estelle, is Bear and the boy have friends. Those goliaths out there are mine. I swear to you, if one hair on either the Bear or the boy’s head should fall out of place, I will hold you responsible and those boys and I will pay you a visit. Oh, and by the way, I’m not as particular about the law as Bear is nowadays.”

“Who you be, Mister Faggot?” Estelle asked.

Bear’s whip cracked and a welt appeared on Estelle’s left cheek.

“I did caution you about respect,” Bear said in a polite, but deadly tone.

“I am Reed Davis. I did the investigation that is going to put both you and your boys in one of the state’s seedier hotels. “ Reed stood nonchalantly picking some lint off his suit. He raised his head and got right into Estelle James’ face.

“I know Zeke Robbins paid you to hurt that boy, and I can prove it. Conspiracy to commit murder carries a hefty jail sentence in this state. I will make sure you and the boys are prosecuted, convicted, and serve the full freight. That is, unless you decide to cooperate and tell us who paid Zeke to hire you,” Reed said.

“I don’t know what all this fuss is about. He ain’t dead is he?”

Estelle countered.

“If he was, I would have whipped your skin until my arm fell off, you crazy b***h. In addition, to clarify my point, he is not my boy yet. If he were, Tyrone and Jamal would be dead already instead of cooling their heels in the police tank. I believe we understand one another now, you f*****g piece of dog shit.”

Bear threw his whip at Bull Raleigh who expertly caught the coil and went down to put it in the secret compartment of the SUV.

Donald turned on his heel, indicated to Joey to follow, and gave his back to the now taunting Estelle James. This woman caused great harm to come to my boy. Another thing his gran had taught him, “He who laughs last, laughs best.”

“Estelle, should your boys have any questions, you send them to me. It seems like they need discipline. I will be waiting and Bull, Reed, and I would be thrilled to teach them some. Only I use a cane and a cat, not a f*****g knife or tire iron. I can draw out the pain for a long time. Tell them to ask for Bear Drummond of Indiscreet.” Estelle James’ face froze. It seems he still had a rep in the old neighborhoods.