The Crush

The Kiss

I have been feeling pulled in two different directions lately, spending time with both Lathan and Alex. It was a strange feeling to spend time between two guys who were both so different but who I liked for different reasons.

Lathan had planned a perfect Saturday for us. We went to the amusement park, laughing and screaming as we rode all the roller coasters, then ate way too much cotton candy. We even won each other stuffed animals at the game booths. As I held his hand and walked around, I felt so content and at ease.

"Are you having a good time?" Lathan asked, twirling me around by the finger.

I giggled, "Yes, this is the best day ever."

"I'm glad you're here," he said, smiling at me.

"Me too," I replied, feeling my heart swell with warmth.

We rode more rides and watched the character parade in the middle of the park, which happens at 7:30 pm every night.

As the night ended, we headed towards their cars. Holding hands, I felt warm. When I made it to my door, Lathan lingered by the side of the car. He placed a strand of hair behind my ear.

"When will we do this again?" Lathan asked confidently, playing with my sleeve.

I opened the car door, "When you ask me out again."

Lathan smirked. He stepped closer to me. I could smell his cologne. I closed my eyes to take it all in. Then, when I couldn't stand the anticipation anymore, he kissed me.

Butterflies and tingles took over my body. I felt an array of blissful feelings and knew Lathan was the one for me.

I went to Alex's house on Sunday to work on our science project. We spent the day laughing and joking around. I couldn't help but to compare and think about how different Alex is from Lathan. Lathan is funny in a joke telling way, but Alex is naturally funny. I couldn't help but feel happy whenever I was around Alex. It is like he sees me, the real me. Not the me I try to be or aspire to be but the Winter that just is. He doesn't judge me or make me feel bad about my feelings, even if I am wrong. Alex allows me to be weird, quirky, and geeky. I never feel off around him.

After a few hours, Alex's mother made us sit down and eat.

"Mom, we just need another hour to put it all together," Alex said, trying to reason with Alice as she placed the plates on the table.

"Wolf, go wash your hands. It is time to eat," His mother said, pinching his right cheek.

Alex opened his mouth to say something else. Still, I decided to save Alice from the argument by pulling Alex towards the kitchen sink to wash our hands.

"You know I could have brought us another hour if you had let me talk," Alex said with a smile.

"I know, but I'm hungry," I replied.

Alex chuckled as he handed me the soap.

Hand washing isn't the most romantic activity in the world; however, as our hands touched, it sent tingles down my spine. Alex must have felt nothing because he didn't react. He just turned off the faucet and headed toward the dinner table.

Dinner, of course, was delicious. Alice can cook anything. I would eat here every night if it didn't start rumors or hurt my mother's feelings.

After dinner, I packed up my car with binders, books, and a huge diagram that took up most of my back seat.

"Thanks for dinner," I waved to Alice, who was at the door, before closing it behind her.

I stood on my toes to give Alex a hug as we said our goodbyes. He squeezed tight. This hug felt different from the others. When he pulled back, I looked up at him, "Friends," I smiled. Alex did not answer. He instead pulled me into another hug and pulled back enough to be face to face. Our noses touched. My heart started beating fast. And then we kissed.

I don't know why we kissed. But I wanted to do it again. It was a soft, gentle kiss, and my stomach filled with butterflies and tingles.

"Friends," Alex finally said back. He opened my car door and told me to text him when I got home to make sure I got home safe. I just looked at him. Stunned almost.

As I pulled up in front of my house. I was still lost in my thoughts. I can't believe I kissed two guys in one weekend. I feel so conflicted.

I like Lathan. Alex is my friend. Why did we kiss?

Lathan is sweet and caring, and I love the way he makes me feel when we are together. But Alex is smart, funny, and charming. I can't help but feel drawn to both.

I like Lathan. Alex is my friend. Why is this upsetting me? I wiped a tear coming down my cheek.

"Crap," I said out loud. "I like Alex too."