The Mother of Fangs and Fire

A New Beginning

-Emery-

Pain is something we feel more than once in our lifetime. The small things serving as not much of an issue, yet still affecting us in many ways. Bigger problems strive to test our patience, pulling every cord while getting our sanity close to snapping.

Some say that pain is only temporary, but I see it as much deeper than that. Real temporary pain, is those bruises and small cuts. While everlasting pain is the emotional damage left behind by our lost. That trauma is something we can’t forget easily, in fact it dabbles in a whole other ball game when it comes to pain.

Countless amount of people have dealt with the feeling of losing someone or something that meant more than the world to them. Whether it be a loved one or an object equivalent to such; we all agree losing something like that is one of the most painful experiences a person could ever encounter.

This type of pain may cause us to lose ourselves, and laugh as we ignore the people around us. From s****l harassment to a bully taking it too far, you can see how traumatizing things can be and the impact it leaves on people as a whole.

I am struggling to move on from the past. Losing my mother was and still is one of the most terrifying things to have happened to me. Despite the troubles'; I face daily, with a sense of hope, I tried to persevere in every aspect. I relied on the chance of finding my mate, as well as the presence of my father as a reason to hold onto that life of mine. I hoped to push on until I couldn’t anymore, not allowing the heartbreak to stop me from discovering who I was meant to be.

At that moment I sat in class, allowing my mind run freely. As you can see, I'm a deep thinker and unintentionally state things more complicated then they need to be.

Some would say it’s an advantage I had over others, as deep thoughts allowed me to reassess my ideas and life in general. I think more than once over every subject, stopping me from making miniature mistakes, but in my eyes I used to believe that it didn’t save me much from the unfavorable world.

I planned to rush out of the classroom as soon as the bell ringed. You could say being a nerd meant loving school, but I tended not to fit such stereotypes. In fact the idea of it chilled my bones and I began hating it with a passion, knowing that I’d be treated as anything but a person behind those aged walls.

Before I could think to far, the bell rang indicating it was time for lunch. I dashed out of the classroom with a smile on my face but slowed down to walk after reaching far enough away from the doors. There’s no hurry in getting pushed and shoved out of the lunch line.

Good news filled my senses that morning. It was my last day inside of that s**t house, and I didn’t have the patience to wait for it to end.

Gratefully I had gotten accepted to the Elite Academy of my pack grounds named Clair De Lune. A school with one of those fancy-schmancy names that held all the elites across pack territory.

My grades were outstanding, my comprehension level just as equivalent, allowing me to get invited with a full scholarship. And not only would the school be good for me academic wise, but some humans attended it as well; therefore I’d get the opportunity to be less of an outcast.

The thought of not getting judged as much for my lack of inner wolf, felt satisfying. Even though it would always be a disgrace to our werewolf kind. I did my best to stop thinking about my misfortunes and continued walking to the line.

Finally in the line, I grab my very nutritious plate of soggy chicken tenders and milk and then make my way to my signature table. Alongside me sat nobody else, as I remained being the only participant. Its lack of other people serving as no surprise to me.

Us werewolves usually act close and consider all to be our family. I on the other hand stood out to much in the self centered box we called society. You could see me as the weak link to a dysfunctional chain. Many believing me to be a curse from the moon goddess.

I scanned the tables around me while eating my food, not surprised to see disgusted and disturbed stares aimed back. Nonetheless I spent the rest of my time, watching how others interacted and envied what it was like to have someone enjoy your company. Looking I couldn’t help but think how great would it be to receive that at least once in my life.

Done with my food, I get up and dispose of the diabetes on a plate, and then make my way to the last class of the day. It was too exciting, knowing I’d escape away from the hell. Then as alway arrived to my class early.

You know what they say, “successful people are always on time”. Okay, so they don't say that, but hey; it sounds responsible at least. While waiting outside the classroom doors in the hall, I notice all the friends and couples standing around. Most of the couples were arguing or expressing their love deeply in the middle of the hallway. Many friend groups talked animatedly towards each other, sharing their lasted gossips with each other.

Speaking of gossip, though they were trying to be discreet, two girls from my class were unsurprisingly talking about me. “Wow, they sure have intriguing lives”, or not. They as always, spoke in ill tones, most likely trying their best to tear at my self esteem yet failing desperately. Eventually when your tormentors are the same you get used to the Ill blows being dealt at you.

"Did you hear about that mutt freak Emery leaving school today"? Said Karen, who could not keep her mouth shut. "No," Emily Trenton replies, as a follower. She was one of the most annoying and clingiest bitches I've ever met, both of them thinking they were better than anyone else. It’s funny how they dared to talk about me, seeing as they were two of the most idiotic beings of our school. I mean they didn’t even recognize calling me a mutt was an insult to their entire kind.

"Of course she is, yet she’s going to some smart kids school. Though honestly I feel it’s really for dummies," continued Karen.”Wow, who would even accept a weak dumb-ass girl like her," Emily questions with the irony behind it all. Their whole conversation seeming pretty idiotic, as I often wondered why the hell they ever cared about what I did. Was I that entertaining, to the point my life become a huge topic of their own?

‘That's enough’, I thought while deciding to approach them. It was my last day anyway, so I figured why not for once put on big girl pants and stop others from trying to screw me over. Then I would be able to have a fresh start, while being satisfied with how I handled past issues. That in mind, I walked up to them in full confidence.

"Hey, you two, tweedle dee and tweedle dumb. Did you know I can hear both you stupid bitches from way over there. Either you whisper loud or don’t now how to talk properly, cause your nonsense can be heard a mile a way, and I don't even gotta have a wolf to hear it. Would you please spare my name, and maybe talk about other crap while living your own f*****g lives for once, Thanks". I finished leaving them both shocked.

"Wha-, Don't you get cocky just because you're leaving mutt freak," says Emily with a shaky voice. "Y-Yeah, we have connections and will make sure you get it before you leave today"! Karen states after her, in a (I'm trying my best to be intimidating) voice. You could say I was not impressed.

For a couple of she-wolves, they sure had no backbone. I could tell that leaving a little earlier would be necessary. After all, I didn’t want their f**k boy boyfriends to come at me with a whole gang.

To be honest, it never was the snippy remarks I got from people that affected me. But others started using me as a mural of their own. My body was a personal punching bag of the many people that wanted to state their dominance. In this school, I was a nuisance and a burden. When you see something like a burden, you only; wish to get rid of it. Therefore to me, everyone became a predator, and I the prey, begging for survival. The fact that we were all part animal made it feel natural in a way.

Walking away like a boss from the two idiots, I head into my classroom and take a seat. Lessons were always below my understanding, so I’d just sit in class and take a nap. When the few minutes left finally came, I stared at the clock while screaming in my head for it to speed up the process.

Hearing the bell, I zoomed straight out of the class and head for my Mercedes-Benz G Class. My family was pretty well off, despite my father not fully being present in my life. Yet I remained grateful for the things I had, as financially we were in the middle of what's considered high class. To be precise we were not poor nor considered “rich” either.

I drove out of the parking lot as fast as legally possible, turning the music on quickly. Just as I was about to hit the main road, the boys who were waiting for me, ran out of the building; causing me to chuckle inside at the sight that I was long gone. Waving them goodbye with a sweet little smile and a finger present, I head straight to my soon to be ex-home.

My childhood home was a place of many memories. I could only cherish them inside of me, as the heartache they left sometimes feeling overbearing.

In disappointment when I walked out of my car, I saw my father's was not in the driveway. I recognize he was not going to be home until late at night, often an excuse he made to avoid my existence.

I always wished he could of made more of an effort to spend the last night with me. After all, I was his only daughter. I didn't have anyone and was about to venture into a new world alone, with not much guidance to get me through it at all. I knew it was hard for him, but it felt it could have been nice if he took into consideration how scared I felt.

“Maybe one day”, I’d always say to myself”. Praying something would click, and he'd be able to; properly show his fatherly love. “Maybe one day”, he’ll see me as an actual person and not someone who walks around as the spitting image of his beloved former wife. Though it had been ten years; I finally began to doubt these hopes for change.

Opening the front door, I make my way to my bedroom. The room wasn’t to complex; as the shade black and my favorite color navy blue were both implemented into the design. My queen-sized bed consisted of a black-white sheets and blankets, while the bed frame itself was grey.

I kicked off my shoes, and threw my backpack to a corner, plopping onto the bed upon entry. After a few minutes the energy to get up fills within me, and take off my clothes to have a relaxing shower. Soon after I come out cocooned in a soft fluffy black towel.

Getting dressed again, I make my way to the kitchen and grab the leftover pasta from the fridge. I stuff food in the microwave and allow my thoughts to take over while patiently waiting for it to cook.

Was it weird that I could almost picture my mate crystal clear? I could visualize almost-every detail except for his face. At least I thought the man in my thoughts was my mate. I prayed it wasn’t some random guy from my lonely imagination.

When my food finished heating up, I made way upstairs back into my room. Turning on the TV to Netflix, I eat, and watch a few movies to pass the time.. Pretty soon, my eyes grew heavy, begging me to sleep. Thoughts of the next day being busy left my mind, as I allowed myself to succumb to the darkness calling me.