The photo is really me

chapter 3

After that message, [X] finally stopped texting, and the bear emoji with a waving hand never came through again. It seemed like [X] had been rendered speechless by Fang Zhi Mo. In fact, Fang Zhi Mo was someone who was often approached by others, and he knew how unoriginal and pointless that line could be as an icebreaker. It sounded like something a lovesick fool would say. It was perfectly normal for the subway guy to stop engaging with him.

As the instrumental music started playing again in his ears, Fang Zhi Mo rubbed his slightly flushed face, locked his phone, and put it back in his pocket. After that, nothing interrupted the music. Fang Zhi Mo walked slowly along the river, thinking about how the subway guy’s personality seemed quite different from what he had imagined when they first met. Although it’s wrong to judge people by their appearance, when Fang Zhi Mo had seen him on the subway before, the guy was wearing a trendy brand hoodie, a baseball cap, and had a slightly rebellious, playful vibe. Fang Zhi Mo himself was introverted, and when his social anxiety kicked in, he just wanted to stay home and play the piano. But, in truth, he envied those who thrived in social situations. Sometimes, during department gatherings, he saw how easily his friend Meng You could strike up a conversation with anyone, and Fang Zhi Mo genuinely admired that.

But in the few minutes he had chatted with [X], aside from the initial bear emoji, the guy seemed rather aloof and reserved. As the saying goes, for every "i" type, there must be an "e" behind them to make the conversation flow. Two "i"s together would struggle to get anywhere. Forget it. It was already awkward enough. Since the subway guy didn’t seem interested in continuing the chat, it was probably best to just leave things there. Fang Zhi Mo quickly let the incident fade into the background, treating it as a small and unimportant episode.

It had only been a short while since the semester started. There weren’t many classes in the piano department; most of the time was spent on free practice. Meng You had said he would help Fang Zhi Mo find out about the subway guy’s school and major, but in reality, Meng You had been out having fun, going out early and coming back late, enjoying his freedom before the real work began. The next time they met was when the counselor told them it was time to move dorms.

Hai Da University was located by the mountains and lakes, with a vast campus. It had four academic divisions, each with its own dormitories. Their art college, however, had fewer students, so they were always shuffled between different divisions' dorms whenever there was space. When Fang Zhi Mo first came to university, there wasn’t enough room in the dorms, so he had been temporarily assigned to the Department of Information’s dorm, which meant he had to cross most of the campus to get to the music practice rooms. Now, there was finally an available spot in the Department of Literature and Science’s male dorm, and the counselor contacted them early that morning, asking them to come and move their things.

The original dorm had a fair amount of stuff, so moving would take some effort. Fang Zhi Mo was wondering whether he should call home and ask Uncle Wang, the family driver, to send someone to help. But then he hesitated, not wanting to appear too showy or attract unnecessary attention. Just then, Meng You called.

“Fang Xiao Mo, where are you? Don’t tell me you forgot about moving today?” His voice sounded unusually cheerful. When Meng You was in a good mood, it usually meant his relationship with his boyfriend was going well.

Fang Zhi Mo had been a bit worried since he hadn’t seen Meng You around recently, but hearing his voice now, he felt relieved. “I didn’t forget. I was just about to call a moving company.”

“Which moving company? Don’t! I’ve already arranged everything!” Meng You’s voice became hurried. “Three strong guys are waiting in the dorm! All you need to do is come back!”

“…I haven’t placed an order yet.” Fang Zhi Mo paused. “You’ve already called movers?”

“Yeah, of course! The guys and all their tools are ready. We’re just waiting for you. I don’t know if you still want some of the stuff in the dorm. You’d better hurry back!” Meng You laughed, and with a teasing tone, added, “Come on, don’t keep us waiting!”

“…Alright.” After hanging up, Fang Zhi Mo made his way back to the dorm. When he arrived, he quickly realized where Meng You’s mischievous chuckle had come from—there were three unfamiliar guys standing in the small dorm. One of them looked somewhat familiar. Fang Zhi Mo stared for a moment before recognizing him as Meng You’s new boyfriend, a younger student from the Foreign Language department. The other two, however, were complete strangers. Fang Zhi Mo took off his backpack and looked at them in confusion.

“This is my husband, you know him already, so I won’t introduce him again,” Meng You said, walking over to put an arm around Fang Zhi Mo’s shoulder, and then introduced the other two guys. “This is Chen Chi, my husband’s roommate. And this one—” At this point, Meng You laughed and glanced at the last guy. “Why don’t you introduce yourself to Xiao Mo?”

The last guy scratched his head, looked at Fang Zhi Mo, and as soon as Fang Zhi Mo said “Hi,” his face turned bright red.

“…So, they’re the movers you called over?” Fang Zhi Mo thought.

At this point, Fang Zhi Mo understood everything, but the boys were only trying to help, so he didn’t want to say anything. He just smiled politely and thanked them for lending a hand. The boys started working right away. The unknown younger boy, with his face as red as a tomato, immediately approached Fang Zhi Mo, asking if things needed to be dismantled or moved, buzzing around like a little bee. Yet, throughout it all, the boy’s face remained flushed, his gaze wandering, never daring to rest on Fang Zhi Mo for more than a moment.

Although Fang Zhi Mo was shy, he’d been pursued by a number of boys before, simply due to his looks. Despite that, the intense atmosphere of “senior, I like you” coming from this boy made him feel incredibly awkward and nervous. He couldn’t help but feel the back of his neck tingle and had no idea how to handle it.

Only after all the bags and items were loaded onto the cart that Meng You borrowed from the security office, and they said goodbye to the younger boys, did Fang Zhi Mo feel like he could finally breathe again. The campus of Hai Da was full of slopes, and as they rode the cart, bumping left and right because of Meng You's less-than-perfect driving skills, Meng You leaned over to him.

“Are you angry?”

“No,” Fang Zhi Mo replied. He wasn’t angry, but the situation had been a bit too embarrassing for him to recover from.

He asked, “Did you bring him on purpose?”

“Not at all,” Meng You replied, rubbing against him as he whispered, “I’m not that kind of person! But when I went to call my boyfriend, the little freshman was right there. He heard we were from the same dorm and offered to help. How could I refuse?” Meng You continued, “Besides, I didn’t know he liked you until we were back at the dorm. My boyfriend and his roommate joked about it, and that’s when I realized. But since he was already here, I couldn’t just send him away, could I? He was just being kind.”

Fang Zhi Mo could only sigh.

Meng You teased, “Besides, I know he’s not your type.” After spending two years as roommates, Meng You had a pretty good understanding of Fang Zhi Mo’s preferences. He poked him in the side with a grin. “You like those big, muscular guys, right? Someone like Xu Rui, who’s so pale his face might rival yours, definitely doesn’t catch your eye.”

Fang Zhi Mo almost choked on his water at that comment. He quickly put the bottle down, grabbing a tissue to wipe his mouth, his face turning bright red. “W-what are you talking about?!”

“You don’t like them?” Meng You acted innocent. “I remember seeing a couple of handsome male models on your homepage the other day. Some of them—” He made an exaggerated gesture with his hand.

Fang Zhi Mo nearly jumped up to cover Meng You’s mouth. “...”

Meng You had the audacity to bring this up! During his periods of being single, Meng You liked browsing the internet for “cyber male deities” and, being the good roommate he was, often shared the links with Fang Zhi Mo. Fang Zhi Mo, being gay, was of course not immune to appreciating the male form. He wasn’t a saint after all.

However, he wasn’t obsessed with it. His tastes were quite selective—he didn’t like bodies that were too exposed, overly muscular or greasy, nor overly commercialized. He liked bodies that were good but with a touch of youthful charm, photos that were sensual but subtle, where the person looked attractive but without revealing everything—something that left enough to the imagination.

So, while he occasionally glanced at such images, it wasn’t a frequent habit. However, the algorithms of the internet seemed to know his preferences, and those occasional searches led to a flood of similar images being pushed onto his homepage. One time, Meng You caught him, teasing him mercilessly. Fang Zhi Mo’s face heated up so much that it felt like steam was coming out of his ears. He opened his mouth, but no words came out.

“And what about that guy you saw on the subway last time? Looks like he’s your type too—athletic, right? No wonder you were paying so much attention to him.” Meng You paused, then added, “By the way, did you add him on WeChat? How’s the conversation going?”

Fang Zhi Mo froze. He remembered the awkward conversation with [X] on WeChat, who had been waiting for a response that never came. He replied ambiguously, “I added him... but we haven’t talked.”

Meng You was surprised. After all, that guy seemed like someone who could hold a conversation, and he thought at least Fang Zhi Mo would have exchanged a few pleasantries with him. “What? You didn’t say anything at all? He seemed like he was trying to chat. I thought he’d at least make small talk.”

During the move, Xu Rui had been nervous, avoiding eye contact and stuttering, and they barely exchanged any words. But at the end, when he looked at Fang Zhi Mo with starry eyes, it was clear that there were unspoken words he still wanted to say. Fang Zhi Mo could already tell that they would meet again sometime.

He couldn’t help but feel a little troubled.

He always had a "head-in-the-sand" attitude, avoiding thoughts when he could. However, he never expected the second invitation to come so quickly. The new dormitory was only ten minutes away from the music room, significantly reducing his commute, and his days somehow became more relaxed. On a sunny Saturday, Fang Zhi Mo rarely slept in, and when he woke up groggily, Meng You had already sat up and was talking on the phone. The phone was on speaker, and the male voice on the other end sounded strangely familiar, asking Meng You, “Has Fang Xuezhang gotten up yet?”

Fang Zhi Mo: “…”

His sleepiness immediately evaporated. He turned over, clutching his pillow, and listened carefully. Sure enough, it was Xu Rui on the other end. Xu Rui asked if they had practice today, mentioning a basketball game where he’d be representing the sports faculty and had saved front-row seats for them. He invited the entire 414 dorm to come watch, and then have dinner together afterward.

Fang Zhi Mo: “…”

Meng You, being playful, kept signaling to Fang Zhi Mo, making a big deal out of it. “Huh? I’ll have to ask my roommate… Xiao Mo? Xiao Mo? Hey, he’s still asleep! What’s up with this kid, sleeping like a pig and not waking up.”

Fang Zhi Mo raised an eyebrow, only revealing half of his face while glaring at him with one eye. He was too lazy to engage, but after a moment, he nodded and silently mouthed, “Go.”

“Oh, he’s awake! He says we can go!” Meng You grinned widely and immediately said into the phone, “Don’t worry, we’ll definitely come. Save the best seats for us, okay? See you later!” He hung up the phone, and before Fang Zhi Mo could say anything, Meng You was already speaking again.

“I’m not tricking you this time,” Meng You said quickly. “Remember the guy on the subway? I found out some information. He’s from our school’s sports faculty, though I don’t know his name yet. Xu Rui and the others are competing with the sports faculty today. You should come see—maybe you’ll see that subway guy again.”

The two of them packed up and leisurely went to the cafeteria for lunch. By the time they finished, it was nearly time. Meng You took another call and then led Fang Zhi Mo to the sports arena. Along the way, Meng You reassured him, repeating that his information was reliable. He knew exactly what Fang Zhi Mo liked, so he wouldn’t introduce him to anyone he didn’t like.

Fang Zhi Mo wasn’t going for the “intel” or anything like that. He still needed to thank Xu Rui for helping with the move the other day, and the invitation had come in the form of a group outing to watch a basketball game. Fang Zhi Mo didn’t see a reason to turn it down. He was introverted, but his upbringing didn’t allow him to act like a complete hermit—he knew how to interact with people when necessary. He planned to treat Xu Rui and the others to dinner that evening, as a way to return the favor.

When they arrived at the sports arena, Fang Zhi Mo was taken aback by the scene in front of him. Despite it only being a school-level basketball game, the place was packed. The best seats were already taken, and Meng You’s boyfriend was struggling to hold their spots with his arms wide open. No wonder they had to reserve seats early.

After squeezing through the crowd, they reached their seats, and Fang Zhi Mo wiped a layer of sweat from his forehead. He sighed with relief and, curious, asked Meng You, “What’s going on today? Why are there so many people?”

“Watching handsome guys, of course,” Meng You teased him, glancing at him with a smile. “The sports faculty has plenty of good-looking guys. It’s not just you who likes guys with abs.”

Fang Zhi Mo’s face heated up, and just as he was about to respond, a loud cheer broke out, and he turned his attention to the court. Several players were warming up in the center of the arena. The ones who had triggered the cheers were probably them—tall, muscular, and wearing black basketball uniforms. It looked like they were wearing the same brand as the guy from the subway.

Remembering Meng You’s “intel,” Fang Zhi Mo couldn’t help but glance at the players. And when he did, his eyes immediately locked onto one particular guy. Even in a group of tall, athletic students, this one stood out, with broad shoulders and long legs. He was slightly turned to the side, wiping the sweat from his face, revealing a toned, sculpted abdomen. The shape and definition of his muscles were perfect…

Maybe it was because Meng You had been constantly talking about “muscle models,” but Fang Zhi Mo found himself distracted. He couldn’t help but follow the guy’s movements with his eyes, and as the player moved left, Fang Zhi Mo’s eyes followed. When the guy moved right, Fang Zhi Mo’s eyes followed again. The sight of his toned body made Fang Zhi Mo feel dizzy, but he kept his expression composed.

Thankfully, it was crowded, and the noise around them covered up any awkwardness. No one noticed Fang Zhi Mo’s gaze, so he didn’t feel like he was being inappropriate.

Just then, the player suddenly turned his head, and his eyes met Fang Zhi Mo’s directly.

Fang Zhi Mo froze. He was caught staring. The other guy, still wiping his sweat, didn’t seem to react at first. But then he let go of the shirt, and it fell, exposing his toned abdomen completely.

Fang Zhi Mo’s face turned bright red. Heat rushed up from his neck to his ears, and he froze for a moment, then quickly turned his body, pretending to search through his bag. He was embarrassed, but his feet were practically digging into the floor in awkwardness.

Did the guy realize he was staring at his abs? Was there a hole somewhere he could crawl into right now?