Slide Into My DM

Chapter Twleve

… tonight I went drinking. I went to a friend’s party, actually a place I’d gone to plenty of times before. But instead of jumping into the deep end without holding my breath, I waited by the side and took my time. I’ve never been a wallflower, more of a disco ball. But tonight I realize the drawbacks of drowning in the center and realize the perks of watching from afar.

Goggles off and everything becomes clear. All these personal details we’ve been avoiding are now at the forefront of my mind. I thought I knew exactly what I was doing, I thought I knew exactly what I wanted. But when left to my own devices I’ve found I am actually rather lost.

I admire how focused you are. I admire that you know your limits. I admire that you not only know what you want, but what you need. You have become an inspiration to me and I hope to do right by you.

Happy Saint Patrick’s Day,

Triple G.

Change can be a good thing. Change can be everything you needed and more. But change can also mean something you didn’t want to happen at all has and there’s no way of avoiding it. No way of going back… so we must accept the new normal.

My roommate/BFF has basically moved out. She got engaged, did I tell you that? She’s still on the lease, still paying rent, but ninety percent of the time she’s gone. I love her… I am happy for her… but I’m also sad.

Those personal things we so carefully avoid? I’m single. Well, I did tell you that on Valentine’s Day, I suppose, but still. Still single. Which isn’t terrible… I’m very comfortable with myself. But the dream of someone… the idea of someone….

Well, it leaves my heart hurting. Friends can only do so much, and though I am grateful, I am hurting too.

I may be as lost as you,

T & R.