Unravelling Me

Getting Used

That weird first impression of me to him is an indication of long lonely nights being alone. I spent my younger years doing all the hard work and the boring things. I never made any decision in my life which puts me in a bad and dangerous state. If you are not like me, you will never understand so don't try. People like me are not afraid of putting up with risks as long as that is what we want, but if it is just random and temporary things and happenings, never mind. Since then, I want permanence and loyalty. I have few people around me. I love all of them sincerely. I don't like small talks with people I am not so close. I would rather change direction if I saw someone coming in the same way as me just to avoid awkward smiles and talks.

This must be the reason I am cold when men approach me especially when I don't know them personally. That's what he did, he messaged me on f*******:. So, it is given that I would just take him for granted. Besides, he is full of himself. When he said good morning, I just replied good morning for the sake of respect. When he asked, How am I? I answered I'm Ok.

He did this every day for more than a month. I got used to it. I got so excited about his every good morning and I feel comforted by his How are you?

This is not good.

I must end this.