May Peace Grace Us

Chapter 31: Her Guilt

In a distant country, an outbreak happened. People who were declared dead suddenly opened their eyes and attacked the people closest to them. A widespread panic was all over, and it cost that county’s government quite a lot of reassurance before the situation became controlled and contained for a period of time.

To make sure it would not cause another alarm, the government hid the news and sent additional forces into the places where people are concentrated in order to prevent a similar episode from happening. Hospitals became a place of their focus, establishing a department specializing in dealing with this matter to take appropriate actions. Naively thinking that as long as they could isolate the ‘sources’, this strange thing would spread all over.

But let's be honest, there are just people who dare not to go to a hospital no matter how severe their illness was. It might be they are afraid to spend money or they are simply too stubborn and proud that they can defeat all sorts of illnesses with their own in-built immunities. The number of these people is simply too staggering and unmonitored most of the time. And from these people the tragedy started.

Aila was simply unaware of this happening. Even if she knew, she would only be alarmed and perhaps a little frantic about returning to her sturdy nest. But overall she will not be too surprised at it.

Back when she wrote about this world, she had once written a sentence or two about this happening in advance in one particular chapter. To be honest, the incidents were indeed controllable to a degree. But the one that made things worse was the next light show in the sky. On the eve, everything changed.

The aurora on the eve of the apocalypse was special and has caused great mutations to all living things. As the plants and animals have already started their adaptations long before humans have noticed signs of great changes, they have the advantage in that department. But because they accumulated their mutations, it was not a surprise they did not change immediately.

But the moment they finish their evolution, they are proven to be a tough opponent. They are another threat to the survival of humanity. Thankfully, some of these animals and plants had some symbiotic relationship with humanity, therefore leaving a room for struggle for everyone.

Humans, on the other hand, were at a disadvantage. Most people nowadays don't really like to move and get energetic because their cells are less active than those of their ancestors. They may have had science make up for the lack of their body's needs from supplements and various drugs for longevity, these have been their downfall when the aurora baptised the world.

The already weak people, like those in hospitals or on their deathbed, are directly transformed into undead. Next to them are those who are simply not too weak, but simply less healthier than a person should be healthy. Then after them are those who are unfortunately not immune enough to resist the sudden evolution of microorganisms all over. And as humans are naturally social, this was the reason the population directly plummeted.

Opposite to those who had fallen from the start, the remaining population was indeed much stronger and more resilient than the former.

Those who had quite good physical fitness became stronger and some of them even gained abilities that were once thought to be fantasies of the human mind. And these people who gained abilities are collectively called supernaturalists.

Supernaturalists are people who take the other extremes of human mutations. They can command various elements and some could even exhibit skills impossible to those who did not mutate. They are the main force of humanity's survival in the chaotic world. Under their protection, humanity could continue to exist in the world stubbornly.

As for the rest of the population, they don’t have much change. But they are notoriously more adaptable to almost anything. Arming themselves with repeated knowledge and skills, they too found their place in the new world.

Aila has decided to remain in the city for the eve of the apocalypse. It might be safer if she just returned directly to her villa, but she figured out that she should just stay and hone her friends' cautiousness in the changed world. Although the worst of humanity is not too obvious in the early days, it will be enough to let them see what they need to do in order to survive. That only the strongest and the most capable can live in the changed world.

Aila planned to let them at least kill a zombie on their own before they leave. This is to make sure that everyone will get used to it as fast as possible. Other than that, she wanted to make them learn some tricks or two during the early days, and maybe she could train them along the way for their manifestations of abilities.

Aila trusted her people in their family property. She trusts them not to fail her, like most of the people in this world had failed her and her friends back then. They are not different from a family to them, especially those who served them for generations. For greater assurance, she removed the new ones and called all the families of their life-long people into the property to add labor.

And, of course, as the information about the apocalypse was strictly managed by her, she only invited them in for a get-together for a week's stay in the community. Most of them are quite affectionate to them and obediently went there despite the masters’ lack of presence for the said gathering. Maybe to them it was like a reunion and a return to their roots.

Though Aila basically trusted their servants who stayed for generations, she did not really trust most of the in-laws they had. So she deliberately made a rule on how to deal with them. And they cannot blame her for being rude if they committed something they should not do.

“Aila, are you not going to sleep?” Judith asked as she saw Aila in the living room in a daze.

“I cannot sleep mom.” Aila said, not meeting her eyes. “Tonight is the start of everything and I cannot relax my nerves, knowing how chaotic everything will be.”

“Honey.” Judith gave Aila a hug. “Whatever will happen after that night is not your fault. You don’t need to carry the burden of what will happen. You did your best and your choices might seem selfish, but it is the best you can do. Others cannot blame you nor can they curse you for where they found themselves. Each life has its own path and that is where they choose to be.”

“Maybe that is the case,” Aila said. She swallowed the fact she made this world and has basically doomed them to this bleak and hard future. And technically, she was the one who weaved the fate of many under her pen.

“Just cheer up Aila,” Judith said. “Tomorrow is another day. Even if it will be bleak and scary, as you said, it will be. Don’t kill yourself before the real stumble arrives.”

Judith stayed for a little longer before she went to the guest room to sleep. Tonight, Aila advocated that her parents should sleep in different rooms as a precaution. Although she knew that they would not become a zombie in her past life, there was nothing bad if she took precautions against the slim chance that something would go wrong (though she hoped it would not be the case). Afterall, who knows her butterfly wings have caused changes she dares not to think of?

In the silence of the house, Aila began running her mind to the scenes of the early apocalypse. Remembering every pitfall she and her friends have encountered along the way. Her parents' death, Honeylet and her child’s tragedy, Jemma’s fate, and the lack of warmth between the materialistic people of their former society. Everything is livid in her mind.

Not to mention, even now, she has a great influence on the lives of many without her deliberately acknowledging it and even those involved do not know it. For example, the lives of Jemma and Honeylet, she has waved their future to be at her disposal. As long as they lived, they cannot truly be without a trace of her shadow behind them.

Sighing deeply, Aila shut the lights and went to her room. And there she opened the windows to observe the starless skies. Anticipating the changes in both fear and excitement, a manic smile formed on her face.

“Did I do it right?” Aila asked no one in particular. “Or did I do something wrong? I admit I had lost so many things at once back then that it is impossible for me to truly be the same as I once was.”

The wind picked up at her words. Upon her cheek was a gentle caress from an invisible hand. Reassuring her and making her at the same time grounded before she jumped at conclusions she should not.

“Everything was my making and the direction of this world is very clear to me.” Aila couldn’t help chuckling at her words. “Tonight was the start of the plot I made. This world was under by pen onwards. Hundreds of thousands to millions will die under the words I wrote back then. Mom was wrong, saying it was not my fault. The words I wrote doomed everyone. The reason why they died is my fault is on my head and no one else."

“The burden was mine to bear. All the deaths afterwards are upon my shoulders. Even if I did not personally s*******r them, it does not change. It was me who was the catalyst of everything. If you knew, would you still continue to say those words to me?” Aila felt really bitter and sad facing her own reality. A truth that perhaps only she will know and live with.

The wind was rioting under her words. Her room became a mess as tears fell upon her eyes. She felt so insecure. She wanted to lean on someone, find someone to vent everything she had hidden in her heart. The weight of her secret is overwhelming even if she has opened up sections of them.

“I’m scared.” Aila admitted out loud. Like a child, she curled so small to where she was. “What If I failed to protect them this time around? I am willing to take the blame for the tragedies others have experienced, but I am terrified of losing more than I already have.”

The sky behind her was starting to glow as she continued to say her monologue. Brighter and much more magnificent than the lights of a city nightscape. Brilliant in ways humans could never replicate in its truest sense.

Aila did not know at this moment, her eyes had been glowing eerily since the aurora first appeared. The wind that gently caressed her now had a much more subvient attitude to her. Like a loyal knight who kneels in awe of the majesty their lord was, the was on its knees before the crying girl. As long as she commands it, the will do its best to give anything for her smile and comfort.

“Tonight my sins will accumulate. May the victims forgive me for what I have brought them.” Aila, for the first time in her life, prayed for a god she knew that does not exist in this world. Even for the comfort of her mind, she wanted to believe that those who died would not forgive her so easily.