“Oh— Oh, god. Yes.” I throw my head back as I bounce faster on Liam’s d**k. It’s not as large as the ones in my past but that’s not what matters. It has a curve that drives me insane and he lets me be on top whenever I want which feels so bloody good. “f**k, I’m going to c*m. I’m gonna c*m, I—”
My orgasm hits me like a volcanic eruption, loud inaudible words blubbering out of my mouth as I shake, my walls twitching around his d**k as I hear him curse softly underneath my breath and c*m inside me before I fall onto his chest, breathless and tingling with excitement.
I don’t know how long I lay there, taking in his scent and listening to his heartbeat before I hear him say, “I thought we were gonna watch a movie together, Aurora,”
And now the moment is ruined.
I try my best not to let out a groan as I roll off him and come off the bed. My throat itches for a cigarette, or alcohol— but I know better than doing any of the two in front of him, so instead, I walk to the bathroom and sit on the toilet.
He comes in only after five minutes, standing at the door with his pants back on and a disapproving look in his eyes. “I mean, I understand if you’re horny and all, but getting on top of me—”
“You could have just said no, Liam.” My voice comes out exhausted and tired. Which I am.
He sighs there. “I’m not mad that you want to have s*x with me. I just think if something is wrong—”
I rise up from the toilet seat and go to the sink. I squirt soap into my hand and rub it together. “Nothing is wrong. Why does me, wanting to have s*x with my partner that I barely get to see anymore because we’re both working our asses off to pay our debts be such a f*****g issue? I just wanted to sleep with you. I don’t even know why this is such an issue—”
His hands wrap around my body from behind now, his chin resting on the top of my head as he says softly, “Okay, okay. I understand.”
I swallow, trying to ignore the feelings welling up my chest as I stare down at my hands. I’ve scrubbed them hard, too hard, and they look bruised and pale. I sniff, pushing down the thoughts going to my head as I place my hands under the faucet and rinse them off before he makes me turn around to look at him.
He holds my hands up and places a towel around them, drying it off before kissing the back of both of them and saying, “We could watch something cheesy, take our thoughts off all this. Maybe a romcom, what do you think?”
I don’t tell him that he doesn’t ’understand’ and I don’t think he ever will. I don’t tell him that I hate romcoms and would rather just stay cuddled up in bed while he holds me. I don’t tell him the only reason I wanted to have s*x in the first place is because I spent the entire weekend thinking of how big Mr Ward’s d**k could possibly be.
Instead, what I do say is, “Sure. Which one?”
Now, I’m sitting next to him on the couch, trying not to think of the fact that I haven’t sold the watch yet, that I should bury it in a hole and possibly work somewhere else. I can hear Liam laughing faintly beside me but my thoughts are elsewhere. It’s with him.
He hasn’t come to the club, nor has Vance visited.
And I can’t stop thinking about him.
When I try to sleep, he’s there with his fingers inside me, in my mouth, or my cunt. When I’m awake, I feel like he’s watching me, wanting to see what I do next, what I say next. I am constantly on edge and waiting.
And I don’t even know what I’m waiting for.
My phone buzzes on the table. I turn to look at Liam, but he doesn’t notice it. I take my phone, my stomach instantly turning as I read the words on the screen.
Unknown number: I see I made a mistake not to cut off the hand that touched you, but this is fine. I have been curious about stripping off the skin of a person anyway :)
“Who’s that?”
I quickly turn off my screen and snap my head towards him. “Someone from the club,”
He looks at me now, chuckling, “You don’t like anyone from the club. You aren’t even friendly with them to give them your number,”
Fuck. “Its something about my shift,”
Even though I don’t really want to talk about any of this, I know that deep down, I want him to ask. I want him to push and ask why I’m hiding my phone, or ask about work. But I know Liam. He’s never been fully on board with my job and how unsafe it is so he avoids every possible conversation on it as much as he can.
I watch him nod, a sad emotion welling in my chest before he says, “Ah, before I forget, I got a job interview at that company I’ve been telling you about,”
I smile there. “Really? That’s great. I’m happy for you,”
He gives a mock bow, making a fake British accent, “Thank you. Thank you,” Then he wraps a hand around the back of my neck and pulls me closer before placing a kiss on the top of my head. “And it’s all thanks to you,”
He always says that about me. Whenever something good happens to him, he says it’s thanks to me. Even when I do nothing.
Even when my existence at the moment is a possible danger to him.
My phone buzzes again but I don’t turn to look at it. Instead, I get into his laps and bury my face in his neck. I hear him laugh, his arms around my hand pulling me even closer to his chest.
Safe. Warm. Quiet.
Those are all the things I feel with Liam. Those are all the things in my life that I didn’t always have until he came alone. Until I met him.
And the thought of losing it… it terrifies me.