The Man Who Made Me Feel Again

Chapter 5

SAMANTHA…

I never felt so alive in years.

The intoxicating energy that seized me as I whisked egg and sugar, and the confident anxiety that overwhelmed me as I cleaned the table and waited for the dessert to get baked.

I could not fail in front of all these people - the crowd that had blurred out from my vision immediately I set to work.

The only thing that mattered right then was the task in front of me, and the man whose barest touch set my body on a heat higher than the oven’s

I couldn’t tell if he even realized what he was doing to me, and I blamed my quickening heartbeat and weak knees on the bunch of erotic books hiding under my bed stand.

Even hours later when we where done and our plates of chocolate Lava cakes were judged in both our favors, I couldn’t peel my eyes away from his gracious masculinity.

“You know,” he said when I picked my bag up to leave with Laura. I hadn’t even noticed him walking up to us even though my eyes had been on him most of the time.

“Most people who get pulled into these little challenges panic, but you didn’t.”

“I was panicking on the inside,” I admitted.

He looked at me, and the air thickened between us.

His eyes looking far beyond my face - I could swear it was the same look on my face every time Laura caught me in one of my fantasies.

“Then you hide it well,” he said softly, and my stomach fluttered in response.

We were completely lost in our little staring competition when Laura cleared her throat dramatically.

“I need to get something down the street, I will come back to pick you-”

“No I can come with you” I began to protest, knowing fully well what she was trying to do, but she was already hurrying off with the other guests who were slowly leaving.

“Tsk. Maybe it’s to your advantage” I heard Gabriel say.

“How?, I need to get back home…” I wanted to say to my children, to the silent presence of my husband’s lingering presence, but I said nothing.

I was suddenly mute.

Maybe because I was too ashamed to mention who I really am to this beautiful man - a widow with two kids, or because of the silent plea in his voice.

“I could make you a special meal” he offered, “that’s if you’ve still got space for more” he teased, and even with the guilt tugging at my chest, I heard myself laugh.

Not smile, not giggle, but a laugh.

I found myself sitting in a corner of the dimly lit restaurant where anyone could hardly see me, while he said his goodnight to the last of his guests, and his chefs had also turned in their aprons.

I tried to convince myself to change my mind before anything serious happened, but my legs wouldn’t obey - or maybe I just couldn't help the intrusive thoughts forming in my head.

He moved behind the counter, rolling his sleeves up to his elbows again, and for a moment I simply watched him—watched the easy confidence in his hands, the quiet focus that made the rest of the room fall away.

He didn’t rush, didn’t show off. He just… crafted something for me.

“Cupcakes?” I asked, surprised at my own voice.

“Only a chef will know” he smiled invitingly, and I held on to the table to steady my anxious heartbeats.

Against my own will, I got up and walked up the counter where all the ingredients lay before him, waiting to be used - and I wished I was one of them.

Oh Sam! Get a grip of yourself.

When he looked at me again, it took everything in me not to actually touch his arms and feel them.

How could someone be so beautiful and charming and just soo…

“If you keep looking at me that way I fear I might not…” I watched his Adams apple bob, and I wanted to ask him to say what he had in mind, what he will rather do.

But I caught myself and moved back a little.

“I-I j-just… I don’t know…” I looked away embaraased.

“I understand, he replied with a chuckle and got to work.

He was merely whisking eggs, but just watching him do that felt like some real time seduction.

“Here, have a taste”

“Oh…” I took the spatula from him and taste the batter, gosh, I had never tasted anything better.

“I bet I have to watch out for the new competitor in town,” he laughed so freely to my comment, like a little boy, and it did a lot of things to my insides.

“This is so good”

He poured the batter into baking cups and put them in the oven while I leaned back on the counter and just watched him.

“You are looking at me like that again” he smiled and walked towards me, stopping just a step away from me.

I didn’t look away, couldn’t help the daring confidence that seized my body.

I knew I hadn’t imagined anything - the way he looked at me from the moment he showed up at our table earlier, the times I caught him staring at me from behind the counter while he prepared people’s orders.

And asking me to stay back just to bake me cupcakes?

When his hands finally grazed the side of my cheeks, I leaned in to his touch.

His gentle touch awakened so many things in me at once.

A burning desire which even my fantasies could never satisfy.

His other hand held my waist and pulled me up from the counter, to meet his warm stout body.

For the first time, I shut my mind to all the siren noise in my head and aloud my self…feel

“You’re trully beautiful Samantha, do you know that?”

I always knew I was, but hearing a man say that to me again almost brought tears to my eyes.

And when his lips met mine is a gentle but unraveling kiss, I didn’t care to stop myself.

I let his tongue search my mouth in a sensual dance even as he pulled me closer to him.

There will be consequences, I was just too blinded with lust to see them.