Just One Date

Chapter 2 - caught in the middle

I don't have classes every Monday kaya obligado akong tumulong sa Frozen Dreams lalo na at itinatapat ni Kuya Brett ang day-off niya tuwing Lunes.

Dati ay maliit na ice cream parlor lamang ito na nasa ground floor ng bahay namin. Papa personally makes the home-made ice cream that we sell in the shop na minana pa niya kay Mamay ang original recipe. Paggagawa at pagtitinda kasi ng ice cream sa probinsya ang hanapbuhay ni Mamay noon. Dahil doon ay nakapagtapos ng pag-aaral si Papa at ang mga kapatid niya.

Nang lumakas ang Frozen Dreams ay nag-expand na kami. Nabili nina Mama at Papa ang katabing lote ng bahay namin at doon itinayo ang mas malaking ice cream shop pero simula nang maka-graduate si Kuya at siya na ang nag-manage nito ay marami nang nagbago.

Kuya Brett is very innovative. He began creating new ice cream flavors in addition to Papa's traditional ones. Then he started adding different dishes. From fries and onion rings, to burgers and sandwiches, now we're even serving pasta dishes.

May ilang service crew na rin kami pero dahil hands on ang training ni Mama at Papa sa aming magkakapatid sa family business na ito, hanggang sa paghuhugas ng pinggan ay kasali kami lalo na kapag maraming customers especially on weekends.

On Friday and Saturday nights, we even have live acoustic band. Idea naman iyon ng music lover naming Papa. May binabayaran siyang band pero hindi pwedeng hindi rin kami kakantang magkakapatid in support.

Sabi nila art runs in the family raw. Papa strongly believes that making ice cream is a form of art. He's a music lover and that explains why there's always music playing around the house and the shop and he made sure me and my siblings learn a musical instrument of our choice.

Si Mama is great with interior design, siya ang nag-design ng bahay at ng Frozen Dreams and her taste is just unquestionable. That's her artistic side.

Si Kuya Brett, being an HRM graduate, displays his form of art in every flavor of ice cream he invents and in every dish he creates. Hindi lang iyon, he plays the guitar like a pro.

Si Kirk naman, he started playing drums at a very young age. And he is amazing with drawings. He wants to be an architect raw. Bata pa siya pero alam na niya ang direksyon na gusto niya sa buhay.

Unlike me. Daig pa ako ng ten year old.

College na ako pero on a quest pa rin. Naka-ilang lipat na ako ng course from Tourism, to Mass Comm, to Accountancy and finally Business Management pero hindi ko pa rin masabi na iyon na ang gusto kong gawin sa buhay. Ano bang course dapat ang kunin ko para six digits ang maging salary ko pagdating ng araw? Iyon lang ang motivation na nakikita ko.

If art runs in the family, I think it finally ran out on me. It probably reached its dead end pagdating sakin.

Hindi ko alam kung anong form of art meron sa sistema ko o kung meron nga ba. Parang wala talaga kasi akong mapiga.

I don't think counted iyong pagiging mahilig sa ice cream. Oo nga at mana ako kina Mamay, Papa at Kuya sa hilig sa ice cream but the big difference lies in the fact that they're experts in making it whereas kumain lamang ang alam ko.

Pagdating naman sa music, I can only manage a tune or two sa piano. Pero kapag hindi ko alam ang piyesa, ipinapasa ko kay Ethan who plays a lot better than I do.

Nakakatawa dahil ang alam ko napilitan lamang siyang mag piano lessons noon. That time kasi ay niyayaya siya ni kuya mag-aral ng gitara pero nang nalaman niyang mag-aaral ako ng piano, mas pinili niyang sabayan ako. In the end, mas madali pa siyang natuto at mas marami pa siyang alam tugtugin kesa sa akin. Mas magaling na naman siya. Sa kanya yata lumipat ang form of art na dapat ay sa akin.

I heaved a sigh of frustration at the thought of Ethan and opened a bag of candy sprinkles, hoping that the colors would somehow cheer me up as I filled the near-empty jar.

"Did you enjoy our new flavor?" I asked Wendy, our neighbor and a regular customer, as she got up to leave with her younger brother.

She smiled at me in response and held two thumbs up.

"This is my favorite flavor," she stated.

I asked her to try Kuya's new concoction, Vanilla Malt Truffles, when she came in and this is great feedback. I'm sure Kuya will be thrilled ko know his new flavor is selling great.

"Huwag kang magsalita ng tapos, baka next week may bagong flavor ulit si Kuya, you might want to change your mind by then," I joked.

"Well yes, you're right," she agreed and giggled as they made their way out of the shop.

There are only four customers left in the shop. It's three in the afternoon and I know so well that in about an hour, dadami na ulit ang mga customers paglabas ng mga bata sa kalapit naming school.

I was just making the waffle cones ready for the kids when my cellphone rang.

"Ganda ng family pic ninyo nung Saturday ah," my cousin Bethany said from the other end without bothering to say hello.

Bethany is my cousin sa side ni Mama. Medyo malayo ang age gap namin but she's definitely my best friend. She's the sister I never had.

"Kung hindi ka sana muna nag-attend ng retreat noong weekend, eh di sana kasama ka sa celebration."

"Ikaw naman, alam mo namang ang tagal kong hinintay iyon, pagbigyan mo na ako. It's my weekend getaway."

I laughed.

"Getaway from Tyler?" I asked mischievously, knowing na hindi pa rin siya tinitigilan ng matagal nang nanliligaw sa kanya.

"Ang dami nang nag-like, di ka nagko-comment sa mga pics?" she asked back instead, obviously avoiding the topic.

"Hindi ako informed na nag-upload na si Kirk," I replied, trying to balance my cellphone positioned between my left cheek and shoulder while putting some marshmallows on a glass container.

"Iyon nga lang mga tatlong pictures ka lang yata present, mas marami pang kuha si Ethan kesa sa iyo."

That's nothing new. It's a long known fact that my family is crazy about Ethan. They adore him. He's in each and every family occasion we had at kapag nagbuklat ka ng family album, mas marami pa talaga siyang picture kesa sakin. Probably because I hide somewhere whenever he's around, which wasn't easy because that's almost everyday.

"Ano namang bago doon?" walang ganang tanong ko.

I rolled my eyes, knowing exactly where this conversation is leading. As much as she hates talking about Tyler, gustong-gusto niyang inuusisa ang tungkol sa amin ni Ethan.

"Wala, kasi diba nga he's already a part of the family-"

"Which leaves me no choice," I cut in.

"Pero ang gwapo ni Ethan dun sa isang kuha ninyong dalawa, yung nakatingin siya sa iyo habang kumakain ka ng ice cream. Mukhang inlove na inlove talaga sa iyo. Kung hindi ka nga lang nakasimangot ang ganda sana ng picture na iyon."

I made a mental note to ask Kirk to remove that picture bago pa makapag-comment ng alanganin ang mga kamag-anak kong naghihintay sa kahihinatnan ng lovelife namin which is never gonna happen.

"Bakit, may picture ba kami na naka-smile ako?"

Tumawa si Bethany sa kabilang linya. Kung kaharap ko siya ngayon ay siguradong tinititigan na niya ako sa mata at pipiliting aminin na kahit papaano ay may gusto ako kay Ethan.

"Fen, what's not to like in him? He's gorgeous from head to foot, he's sweet, he's got brains, he's talented, and he loves you ve-"

"He's a pest," I supplied at hindi na siya pinatapos.

"But he's one damn good-looking pest, don't you think? Come on, admit it," she insisted and I sighed.

Ang totoo, Ethan is very likeable. He could easily be someone's Prince Charming. Gwapo siya, athletic, matangkad at maganda ang katawan, mayaman at matalino.

Hindi ko alam kung hopeless romantic ba ako deep inside pero wala talagang 'spark' kapag nakikita ko siya and that's something na hindi ko pwedeng ipilit.

Hindi rin ako iyong tipong nagkakagusto sa isang lalaki just because of his physical attributes. I need more than that.

Sobrang kulit ni Ethan at madalas nakakairita na. He lacks maturity. His parents supply everything he needs kaya sa tingin ko hindi siya magiging matiyaga sa buhay. He's spoiled, he gets everything he wants in life. Wala siyang masyadong pakiaalam sa future niya because he has everything.

Isa pa, he's a happy-go-lucky kind of guy. Pa-easy easy lang siya. Wala masyadong direksyon ang buhay niya. Parang hindi alam ang gusto sa buhay.

Just like me.

Those are probably the things we have in common. We're compatible for all the wrong reasons. At kapag pinagsama kami, siguradong ililigaw lamang namin ang isa't-isa.

"We've talked about this a couple of times before, couz," I insisted, not wanting to enumerate the reasons over and over again.

"I know. Nagtataka lang talaga ako kung bakit hindi mo siya magustuhan. He's a total dreamboat. He's very lovable!"

Ang mas nakakapagtaka in my opinion is kung bakit ako gusto ni Ethan.

I'm certainly not very likable, especially sa ipinapakita ko sa kanya. Wala na akong ginawa kundi barahin siya when he tries to make a conversation. Hindi naman likas na masama ang ugali ko pero when it comes to him, I'm a monster. Lumalabas lang talaga ang sungay ko when provoked na sa kamalas-malasan ay lagi niyang ginagawa.

Hindi rin ako kagandahan. As far as I know, I look plain and ordinary. My friends say I'm pretty pero I'm very much aware na mas maraming mas maganda sakin. Iyong mga may gusto nga kay Ethan sa campus, most of them are honestly prettier than me. Di hamak na mas magaganda iyong mga nagkakandarapa sa kanya sa school kesa sa akin.

Minsan tuloy iniisip ko na baka sa family ko siya inlove at hindi sakin. Nagkataon lang that I'm the only way para maging tunay na parte siya ng family.

"Bethany, may mga customers na, I have to go," I said abruptly. I found a way out of the topic when I saw the children approaching.

"Is that for real o baka ayaw mo lang ng pinag-uusapan?" she asked, clearly not believing.

"You can come over if you like. It's been weeks since our last sleep-over. Sige na, we can talk about Tyler the whole night," ganti ko.

"Ha. Ha. Ha. Very funny," she faked a laugh.

"Ang lakas ng loob mo na pagsabihan ako tungkol sa pangde-deadma ko kay Ethan all these years. Akala mo naman ikaw walang Tyler na pinahihirapan. He's been courting you for what, six years?"

"Mas matagal pa rin iyong kay Ethan dahil simula first year high school ka pa, hindi ba?" singit niya but I ignored her question and went on.

"At bakit si Tyler, gwapo rin naman, athletic, may trabaho at sa tagal nang nanliligaw sa iyo, siguradong mahal ka. Pero bakit ayaw mong sagutin?"

"O sige na, diba may customers ka na? Goodbye," she said and hung up without waiting for my reply. I maybe a couple of years younger than her but I know her so well and I know exactly how to shut her up.

Eksakto ang buhos ng mga bata sa pagbaba ko ng cellphone. At kasabay ng mga batang iyon ang isip-batang kinaiinisan ko.

"Ciao, mia Lois! Mi sei mancata tantissimo!" Ethan exclaimed a little too loud when he entered the shop.

The kids stopped to look at him as if he was an alien.

"I mean hello, my Lois! I've missed you," he translated with a smile more to the kids than to me.

"Busy ako Ethan, isara mo iyang bibig mo," saway ko habang pinapakingan ang sabay-sabay na request ng mga batang ayaw pumila sa pagbili ng ice cream.

Without waiting for me to ask for his help, Ethan positioned himself in front of the counter and clapped his hands to get everyone to look at him. He made the kids laugh with some silly jokes and when he caught their attention, he asked them to line up.

Well, he's not a B.S. Education graduate for nothing, that I know now.

"Thank you," I muttered in almost a whisper when he finally found his place beside me. I suddenly felt embarrased to admit that what he did was a big help.

"My pleasure, Lois," he replied and beamed at me as he picked up some cones to help me.

The kids cheered endlessly and my cheeks felt like they were burning while Ethan was all smiles.

Nasaan ba si Mama at Papa? Sabi nila pupunta sila dito kapag malapit na maglabasan ang mga bata!

I was still cursing furiously when the door chime jingled and heaved a sigh of relief when I saw my parents walk in.

"Hindi na pala tayo kailangan dito, andito na ang super hero ng anak natin," Papa kidded when he saw Ethan.

With that, Ethan pulled his sleeves in response to Papa's joke and raised both arms to show off his muscles. The kids eating ice cream cheered once again and clapped.

Kahit busy ako sa pagkakayuko at pagse-serve sa mga bata ay tumunghay ako para pandilatan sila. Mama laughed at me before sitting behind the cash register to take over.

It went on like that for an hours or so. When the last customer left, we all helped in cleaning up dahil mas maaga kaming nagsasara kapag weekdays. After that ay umalis na rin ang tatlong kitchen crew namin habang seryoso ako sa pagbabalanse ng collection.

Mama and Papa were both talking to Ethan and they were laughing together nang dumating si Kuya Brett na siya na ring sumundo kay Kirk.

Kirk gave Ethan a high five bago pa lumapit sa akin para humalik sa pisngi. Si Ethan rin ang unang nilapitan ni Kuya bago tumabi sa akin para itanong kung kumusta ang araw ko sa shop. I maybe just over-reacting at siguro masyado lang rin akong sensitive these past few days pero I couldn't help feeling sorry for myself na parang mas mahal pa talaga nila si Ethan kesa sa akin.

When they got up all at once, I was alarmed.

"Teka uuwi na kayo? Hindi pa ako tapos dito," reklamo ko.

"Maghahanda na kami ng Kuya mo ng hapunan para makakain na tayo," Mama explained.

"O Ethan, mamaya ka na umuwi pagkatapos kumain ha," baling naman ni Papa sa asungot.

"I can stay with you," Ethan offered pero agad na hinila ni Kirk ang t-shirt niya.

Not that I want him to stay, anyway.

When I shook my head, Ethan took my hand dramatically and began saying something I haven't heard before.

"Non voglio lasciarti! Non posso vivere senza di te!"

"Ano?" halos sabay na tanong namin ni Kuya.

"I said I don't want to leave your side. I can't live without you," Ethan explained and winked.

I rolled my eyes at him before pulling back my hand from his grip. Siniko naman siya ni Kirk.

"Bukas ka na ulit manligaw Kuya Clark, mahaba ang assignment ko sa Math. Hindi ko maintindihan iyong explanation ni Teacher," anito kay Ethan.

He is also Kirk's implied tutor. Siguro dahil nga Educ ang course niya pero mas dahil masungit raw ako magturo sabi ni Kirk kaya mas gusto niya kay Ethan.

As they all left, I scolded myself for not focusing on what I was doing. I got so caught up in fuming over the attention Ethan has been getting from my family kaya ayan tuloy, ako na naman ang naiwan.

Nang sa wakas ay na-account ko na up to the last centavo, I saved the collection report and printed a copy for filing. I picked up my bag dahil doon na rin ako gumawa ng assignment ko para bukas and made sure na wala akong naiwan.

As I was locking the door, I could hear racous laughter inside our house. My family's laughter, along with Ethan's.

And I felt a pang of jealousy.

Bakit ganoon? It's Ethan who's trying to belong according to Mama, but how come ako ang nawawalan ng sense of belonging sa sarili kong pamilya?

Middle child ako at napapagitnaan pa ng dalawang boys kaya totoong totoo sa akin iyong sabi nila na feeling left out daw ang mga middle child. But now I'm starting to think na hindi naman dahil middle child ako kaya ako left out.

It's more because laging may ume-eksena on my behalf. Laging may ibang umeepal.

I know it's mean but I couldn't help thinking that life could have been a lot easier and happier without that guy who steals all the attention that was meant for me.

Life could have been a lot better without Ethan.