Episode 2
1610 Words
"I said no! How many times should I say it so you could get it through your head?!" He yelled, jabbing his finger on top of my head.
"Please, I want to fix our marriage. Whatever feeling you have inside, you need to talk it out." I said grasping the hem of his shirt, pleading with my eyes.
It was Friday morning when our house was already filled with an argument. I was begging him to go for our session but with no end he kept refusing, thinking everything was fine.
"Can't you see, you don't talk or look at me the same way as before. Everything is just yelling!" We stood in the middle of the kitchen, eye to eye as I tried to lower my voice down for Ae-Rin.
"Because you can't do things right, you are useless!" He said letting an infuriating sigh, can't he see that everything he says hurts me?
"Please, for us." My eyes were brimming with tears, trying to calm him down.
"No, let go of me." He said, but I stood still clenching on the piece of fabric.
"I won't until you say yes." I said firmly.
"You-" I saw his hand went up in the air and I close my eyes, waiting for the pain on my cheek.
"Daddy ...?" Our eyes turned towards Ae-Rin who was standing in front us, glancing at my husband who was about to slap me.
"Hi princess, Daddy is going to work now." He stopped himself and went towards Ae-Rin kissing her on the cheek as I breath in relief.
Ae-Rin was my savior.
"Mr. Park will see you now." The woman said. I thanked her before grabbing my coat, holding it tightly next to me. My breath shaking before opening the door.
Mr. Park was writing some notes down before glancing at me from underneath his glasses. His tousled brown hair was shining from the windowpane and he was wearing a long sleeve black shirt.
"I'm guessing he didn't want to go?" He asked raising his eyebrows at me. I hung my head low in shame knowing that my effort was toss away.
"Why don't you have a seat Mrs.Kim, then we can start with some questions." He suggested gesturing his hand towards the sofa, I sat there looking at him typing on the keyboard. He was mumbling some incoherent words before turning to me.
"First of all, how long have you been married?"
"We've been married for 8 years" I said thinking how long I have been married to Jin. From all of our ups and down I still stuck with him through those years.
"How was your husband when you first met him?" He said, keeping the question light, I smiled thinking back to the day where I first met him.
I was serving him a cup of coffee and when he turned towards me I know I was hooked.
"He was gentle, caring and romantic." I blush remembering how his personality was. He would hold me in his arms and I would feel safe.
"What was your relationship with your husband before things went different?" He makes me recall back to those moments when we would go on dates like normal couple.
He would shows me affection by kissing me multiple times. I can still remember the taste of his minty breath that caused me to be intoxicated and overwhelm.
Like a pure addiction.
"Sensual and passionate, that's how I describe my relationship. My heart beats for him and he was the one I couldn't get enough of." I replied staring at my wedding ring, the object that held so much meaning to me.
"Do you have any reason why he changed?" Mr.Park pulls me back into reality as I was sitting there grazing my finger on top of each other feeling anxious.
"What you said here will be confidential, nothing gets out from this room. You can trust me." He ensure keeping it professional but how could I tell him something that's sinful ?
Even so, I paid for this session and I can't turn back time to run away. If I need to move forward I need to be honest.
"M-my husband is cheating on me."
"How long have you known this?"
"One year, I've know his affair for one year and I still stay with him." I chew the inside of my cheek feeling how powerless I am since I couldn't make a decision to leave.
But how could I?
I have no one to rely onto other than him.
"Does he know you know this?" He asked calmly, making me admire how professional this man is.
"No he doesn't."
"Look Mrs. Kim, I need you to bring your husband next time so I will know his side of the story. I understand that you want to hide his affair however this isn't healthy for you. You need to communicate with him."
"I-I'll try ..." I know I didn't succeed on bringing him but maybe if I can persuade him again and again he will be willing to come here.
"Thank you for watching Ae-Rin for me." I said holding the sleepy little girl as she place herself comfortably on my arms.
"It's fine, Joo-Young loved that Ae-Rin was here and I'm happy to watch over her." Chae-Ah replies smiling at my daughter, she was the only friend that I have and knowing I could rely on her makes me thankful.
"I also want to thank you for suggesting me to go for marriage counseling." I said, as I remembered she was the one who introduce me to the idea.
Never once would I think about this if I didn't talk about it with her.
"It's fine, out of curiosity who is your counselor?"
"It's Mr.Park."
"Wow? Really? I heard he saves a lot of marriages, he's popular too. Tell me is he handsome?" Chae-Ah said pushing me to answer those question.
"H-H-He is handsome but I'm there to fix my marriage not too ogle some other man." I said causing her to rolled her eyes hearing what Ive said.
"I hope it's not too late for your marriage."
Placing Ae-Rin on the bed I gave her one last kiss before leaving. The way how she slept soundly and peacefully makes me jealous. It's been so long that I've slept like that.
I want Ae-Rin to have the best of both world, even if my marriage isn't perfect I want her to find the best man someone who will love her unconditionally.
Splashing the water towards my skin, I felt my eyes coming back to life. I glance at the mirror seeing how horrible I look. The bags under my eyes was getting darker due to lack of sleep, my skin was getting wrinkly because of stress and my fore line was visible.
Is this why Jin cheated on me?
Because I'm getting uglier?
Hearing noises coming towards our bedroom I went out of the bathroom to check what was happening. Turns out Jin was having a hard time taking his suit off.
"Oh Ji-Eun come here!" I saw his eyes looking at me from head to toe, coming closer towards him I could smell the alcohol that he drank.
Getting his blazer off he immediately embrace me in his arm. My body stopped moving seeing that my husband just hugged me.
I can only hug him when he's drunk.
How pitiful is that?
When his body weight down on me I knew he was fell asleep. A light snore came out from his mouth and I sighed. Whenever he get drunk he would shout and scream at me.
But today it was different. We didn't raise our voices.
"Daddy, it's my birthday soon!" Ae-Rin giggles from her chair telling Jin about it.
"Really? Where do you want to go my princess?" Even though my relationship with him has been horrible I'm glad that he's still treating her as his priority.
"I want to go to Lotte World with mommy and daddy!" I stopped scooping the soup that was in the bowl and turned towards my husband looking at his reaction, I know that he would never accepted that kind of request.
"Sure princess, lets go on Saturday."
"Yay!!!"
I was baffled hearing the words that came out from his mouth. I must be dreaming or maybe I woke up in the right side of the bed?
"Is it really fine if you go on Saturday?" I asked holding his work-case on my hand.
"It will be fine, it's for Ae-Rin" He took the case out of my grasp heading towards the door. There was no words being exchanged other than that. And that hurts me.
Usually he would kiss me and tell me I love you.
Why is it so cold in the summer?
After dropping Ae-Rin at school I went to work. Even though I have a lot of things in mind, I tried to brush it off and focus on today's objective.
"Have you got everything written down for Mr Jung and Ms Young wedding?" I asked.
"Yes but they wanted to change the dates to next month" She spoke opening up the information from the folder about our clients.
"Alright, rearrange it. Tell them that they have to pay a small fee as the contract has stated." I replied before coming back to my office, taking a small sip of my coffee I shifted my eyes at the wedding photo that has been kept in my office.
"You may kiss the bride."
His lip brushed mine the moment we were pronounce as husband and wife. I could feel joy spread through our body, even though only a few of people came that day, our happiness was radiating.
"I love you so much Ji-Eun." He whispered before kissing me back, I could feel the palm of his hand rubbing my stomach, telling me that he also love our unborn daughter.
"You're mine and I'm yours."
That was a lie.
If you're mine ...
Why do you claim other woman?
You're too cruel Kim Seok-Jin.
- Writer
