Lies I Tell Myself

Crossroads

Lyra POV

I watched as Brandon slammed the door as he left, not sure what to say or if I should chase after him. I do care for him very much, but I need him to respect this boundary with me. My family is not a topic I want to discuss or share with anyone. If it was up to me, I would just be nobody far away from where I grew up. I just don't want to be a rogue and, unless I become a rogue, I will always have obligations to my pack and family. I am not built for the life of a rogue. Rogues have to be strong and mentally prepared for isolation or they go feral, and once you have gone feral there is no coming back. Sometimes a mate can help, but that takes the mate to a higher rank than the rogue, which doesn't happen often.

I start scraping off dishes into the trash. No need to try and salvage this meal. Raya, what have I gotten myself into now? I asked my wolf. Maybe she will have some guidance.

You don't want my opinion. I told you to leave that boy alone. He isn't our mate. Raya argued as she rolled her eyes and stretched her body.

Please, be supportive, will you? I need some guidance. I retorted. I started filling up the dishwasher with our dinner dishes.

I am being supportive. HE IS NOT OUR MATE. Thus, he does not matter. That is my guidance. Sassed Raya.

You know what I meant. Even though he isn’t my mate, you can’t deny there is a connection there. Should we try to work this out and go to Seattle? Or do we just end it now and go home to our pack like mother wants? I asked, starting the dishwasher and wiping down the counters.

He is a good place holder and that is it. He will never compare to the passion, love, and sparks we will feel with our mate. We will be stronger than we are now.You know being a housewife is not my forte. I want adventure. Why don't we go for a run? Clear your mind. Let me hunt a bit and relax under the moonlight. Raya suggested.

Whatever you say, Raya. A run sounds good. Okay, let me change into some workout clothes. I conceded and got ready for a run.

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Brandon’s POV

“She didn’t even try to convince me to stay. She just let me walk out the door without saying a word. Do I mean anything to her?” I argued, throwing back my shot of jack.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself. Sometimes things are not meant to work out. Take this as a chance to get away before being tied down to someone who keeps so much from you. Dude, she wants to keep you at arms' length. Either take it as a get out of jail free card and cut all ties, or accept that you won’t have inlaws to deal with and enjoy not knowing the family drama. If it were me, I'd run so fast for the hills and never look back.” Jackson explained. He had a point. There could be a reason for his madness. Jackson was never interested in commitment.

“Hahah, you would have run after the first time you got into her pants. She is too smart for you. You like the dumb models that keep your ego high. Don’t pretend like you are in the same boat. You run so fast from commitment. I am surprised you were able to find a career you enjoy.” I retorted as we laughed. Jackson knew I was right. He hasn’t had a serious relationship since high school. He made his heart broken and swore he would never do it again. “I love her man. I really do. Our future plays in my mind and I know I want no one else but her. She is the passion behind my dedication. She pushes me to achieve my goals and doesn't try to hold me back. She believes in my dreams. Lyra is partly why I have this great job in Seattle. She makes me a better man.” Taping the bar for another shot. The bartender nods his head and pours another round of Jack.

Jackson turns around to face the band, “Dude, look at all these women. You could have your choice of arm candy. See that one there, she has been eye f*****g you since we got here.” he said, pointing with his glass towards the two women in very tight, short dresses and heels that looked too high for them to walk in.

I looked towards the way he was pointing. “Nah, they are more your type.” I said, then went back to my drink, praying they wouldn't come over here after they noticed us looking their way. Jackson nodded his head in agreement.

“When are you done in Seattle? It’s not the same without getting to leave my cave to bother you about getting food.” inquires Jackson, as he looks around the bar trying to find some ladies to join us.

“Man, I forgot to tell you. They offered me a promotion if I agreed to stay in Seattle. It's double my current salary. I heard you are moving up in the company, too.” I said feeling guilty for ranting about Lyra and not spending this time catching up with my buddy.

“Yeah, I am the new lead of the coding security department. We are going to be working on a new coding in the cyber security system to reroute the alerts to be accessible on smartwatches. We are adding some extra features for our elderly customers to allow for fall alerts in the home security systems that can alert family or emergency services. Just a few of the new features my team is working on.” Jackson replied very excited about the new position. He is a bit nerdy. I've known Jackson since grade school and he has always been into electronics, coding, and game creation. He now gets to code for a career and he makes games in his free time. Jackson drones on about all the plans he has to bring the company further into the future of security. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes the stuff is interesting, but right now I can’t get Lyra off my mind no matter how many drinks I throw back. I look at my phone. It's already 11 and there is no text from Lyra.

“Dude give me your phone.” Jackson said, grabbing my phone and putting it in his pocket. He called the bartender over and ordered 4 shots of Jack and 2 Long Island Ice teas. That’s the last thing I remember.

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Lyra’s POV

I stayed out longer than I had intended on our run. Raya caught wind of a deer and chased it for a bit until she was able to win her kill. I don’t really care about deer. I like elk, moose and cows. There is nothing like a long run and coming home to a big ole medium rare steak to refuel you. I arrived back at the apartment by 1am. I was hoping Brandon would be back, but there was no sign of him. I checked all over our little apartment, but he hadn't come back even for a change of clothes. He is big mad. He left his gym bag and trainers. Great, I really thought he would be back by now or at least text. Laying my phone on the arm of our teal blue couch, I went to grab a bottle of water out of the fridge and walked back to the living room.

Sitting down to drink my water and think, I checked my phone once again. I thought about texting him, but I decided to text Halley, hoping she was up. Halley is my dearest childhood friend. She is my boss’s niece and our pack’s delta’s daughter. She has long brown hair, honey brown eyes and a right hock that will factory reset your ass if she hits you. She is truly a badass. Hals graduated top of the warriors in our class. She went on to Silvercrest Pack to become trained like a navy seal to be an undercover warrior. She is sneaky. She is the best at sneaking up behind people and scaring the tar out of them despite her being 5'10 broad shoulders and long legs. Hals is the best at advice and pep talks. We have been best friends since grade school. After Mason pulled my hair, making me cry, she tackled him to the ground and made him apologize. It was the funniest thing ever. Mason was not expecting Halley to be that good. Mason was so mad he told his dad, Alpha Judson, about us. It backfired because Halley got promoted to train with his class for being successful at taking someone two years older and Alpha was born down as a delta. Mason was forced to apologize to me and had to write an apology letter to me. He hated every minute of it. Alpha Judson made Mason read his apology letter at an assembly at the pack elementary. Alpha then had a bullying prevention program to stop pack members from abusing their rank. Halley and I became friends after that and were inseparable.

I finished my water and sent a quick text to Halley hoping she wasn't away on a mission or something. I decided to go take a shower, so I headed to my bedroom. Looking at our queen-sized bed, it looked more lonely than it ever had before. Shaking the thought off, I grab some pj's and put Spotify on to jump in the shower.

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Unknown Pov

Leaving the woods, she had to give up on her surveillance because she lost sight of her mark. The boss is not going to be happy with me not having any new information. I’ve got to figure out who this wolf is and why they are here. Her phone started to buzz. Well it's time to face the music.

“Hey, what's up?” she answered, hoping this is not an update phone call and more of here is more information on her mark.

“No new information. I have eliminated all the other werewolves in the city. Except this one I found today. I followed the wolf for 4 hours. I did not see it transform or catch a scent. I don’t think it is the one we are looking for.” she whispered into her phone.

“No. There was no scent of lycan or hybrid or distinct markings on the wolf. It smelled like a regular wolf. There was just the solid black wolf. Looks like a low ranking male by the size of it. No, I did not see its s*x. I watched it. It hunted, ran, laid next to the river, but never shifted. I only looked down to check the phone for a second and the wolf was gone. I could not find a trail. So I could have been following a regular wolf all along.” She said into the phone to her boss. Her boss was not liking the lack of results. She could hear him slamming and breaking things on the other line. If he did not find who he was looking for soon, we would all be in a good amount of crap.

“Yes sir. I will keep searching. Yes, I will have the traps set….no…yes of course sir. I completely understand. Don’t tell the Alpha. He doesn’t need to think I am not capable of this mission.” she whispered begging for some more time.

Walking off the trail towards the rental car she parked close to the treeline and under one of the many light poles that wasn’t working, she knew had to work harder to find her mark or suffer the consequences of failure. The fate of a failed mission is death and that is not something she wants to face. That stupid wolf disappeared before she could follow it further. She needs to refigure her plan, check the topographical map and figure out where the best places would be to set the traps. Hopefully, the wolf will be caught before the weekend ends.