The Moon that Shatters the Heart

Chapter Four

Sutton

The most annoying thing about living in a small werewolf town is that the post office is a twenty-minute drive into town. I got a post office box for my mail and packages so Ani wouldn’t find me easily. I was wrong. But at least Laiken’s got my back.

Still, I received a message from the post office saying that my package required a signature. That means I must go up to the front desk, ask for my package, and then sign it in front of them.

I suppose this is what I get for ordering a vibrator.

How was I to know that this particular company wants a signature upon delivery? Their website said that it would be in discreet packaging, so at least there is that. No one should know its contents.

I walk inside the building at the same time as my phone receives a notification. Another text from Oscar. I have not been a good friend to him since I left. It has been nearly six weeks since I left Belvieu Creek and Oscar has also been blowing up my phone with apologies and updates, asking me to come back, and that Ani now knows the truth. I have ignored every single one of them and I ignore this one.

It hurts me to see them, but I still haven’t blocked their numbers.

Ani has hooked up with several girls from what I have felt. But has stopped after I hooked up with Basil four weeks ago. Me, however, I do not want to give myself that reputation again. It’s only been Basil, and it was only once. Basil has been ignoring me, which is fine. I never went back out to the bar after bawling my eyes out.

If only my vibrator would give Ani the same pain I have experienced multiple times already.

My phone goes off again and I look down at my phone to read what it is when I run into a hard, tall body that is standing in line in front of me. I look up and see Alpha Laiken smiling down at me.

“s**t, I’m sorry, Alpha.” I apologize.

“It’s alright Sutton.” He eyes me up and down. “Great job during training today. Did not know you had it in you to take down Bear,” he compliments me about my sparring session with a guy in my group. Bear’s name is very fitting. He is big, but looks harmless and is very sweet. I can see him being a teddy bear. However, he can put up a fight.

“Thanks, I didn’t think so either. I’m still convinced he let me win,” I laugh, “Though what he has in size and strength I make up for in speed.”

“True,” Laiken nods, crossing his arms as he talks to me.

“I haven’t had much time to catch up with you these last few weeks. Not since the bar.” His hand rubs the back of his neck, letting out a sigh.

Thanks for bringing that up.

I’m pretty sure I blew my chance with Laiken that night. I’m not upset about it. With my luck, the moment we start something, he’ll find his mate the next day. It’s a risk dating someone who is unmated.

“How’s it going with the old house? Still, making a DIY mess?”

“That’s not fair. I’ve been learning the ins and outs of painting cabinets and re-tiling the walls. I think I’m becoming good at it, and it keeps me busy.” I lift my chin proudly as I boast about my self-efficiency.

“Were there issues with the house? I would’ve sent men out there to get it done.”

“It’s okay, it’s just me wanting to change things up. The house has been well kept. You’re good,” I state before the post woman calls for the next person in line, which was Alpha Laiken.

I take my phone out again, but the second person at the desk calls me up. I give him my name and post office box number, then he excuses himself while he retrieves the box.

“I’ll see you later, Sutton,” Alpha Laiken gives his two-finger salute, earning me several dirty looks from the unmated females behind me.

“Bye, Alpha.”

“Here you go. Just sign here, Ms. Davila.” The man points to the screen of the pin pad and places a large box on the counter.

“I’m sorry. Are you sure this is mine? I was expecting a smaller box, a lot smaller.”

“Yes, I’m sure.”

I sign and pull the box off the counter. Stepping into the lobby, I head over to my box and check it for my other package and my mail. Except Laiken is blocking me from it as he stands in front of it.

“Excuse me,” I nudge him and giggle as I drop the large box on the ground.

“What the heck did you order?”

“I have no clue what’s in it. I think it’s from my sister,” I reply, placing the key in the box and unlocking it.

“You know, you mentioned a sister at the bar, and I was confused. I thought you went to live with your aunt.”

“Well, my aunt turned out to be my sister. It’s new, but I’m so happy it turned out this way.” I shrug my shoulders, opening the tiny metal door.

“Wait, what?”

“It’s a long story,” I say distractedly, as I pull out the smaller box and several letters. All from Ani. My fingers brush Ani’s name written on the front of the envelope. He took the time to write to me after I did not answer his calls or messages and refused to see him.

“You, okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost or something.”

“Yup. I’m fine.” I flinch, lost in the wonder of these letters, then wave my hand to brush it off. “It’s part of that long story.” I put the letters in my bag and set my smaller box on top of the bigger one to carry them out to my car.

“Here, I’ll carry it for you.” Alpha Laiken offers, placing his box next to my smaller one and bending his knees to lift all three.

“Thank you. You don’t need to do that,” I say. He scoffs at my comment and brushes me off. “Well, at least let me grab these smaller ones so they don’t fall.”

“Yeah, that would be convenient,” he smiles as I hold the door open for him, and then I open my passenger car door so he can put the box down.

“Thank you so much!” I hand him one of the boxes that I placed under my arm. The ding of another notification on my phone doesn’t go unnoticed by me.

“Anytime. I’ll see you later. Oh, and don’t get hurt. I mean it, I can send others to do the work.”

“I’m more than capable of doing housework.” I shake my head with a smile, trying to hide just how f****d up I am about Ani’s letters.

Hopping into the driver’s seat, I close the door and start the car. I pull my phone out of my purse, ready to call Lauren, but there is no need to hit dial.

The last notification I received was a text message from Ani.

I hope that my letters and package find you well. Please don’t throw them away. I poured my heart out writing them. I pray that you forgive me or release me from the torture of not being with you.

I read it over and over again, trying to find some hidden meaning in it. Driving back home, I debate on opening the letters or the box first. Both held equal curiosity.

***

When I get home, I’m not ready to open the letters or the box. Instead, I take a shower and change my clothes, putting on a crop top hoodie that I stole from Lauren. Then I sit at the kitchen table and stare at Ani’s letters sitting on top of the wooden furniture, taunting me as I contemplate reading them. Ani is always writing in his journals and guards them from prying eyes. He wouldn’t even let me peek over his shoulder.

In opening these letters, am I finally privy to his secrets, his thoughts, or a part of him that no one will ever know… but me?

I turn my focus to the box that sits there, haunting me too.

My hand reaches for the first envelope that is labeled “1” on the back. My wolf's instinct is to sniff it. It’s traveled far and through many hands and machines that Ani’s orange and wet earth scent barely lingers. Still, I savor it. I analyze his handwriting, all in capital letters. It’s intimidating at first glance. However, it’s delicate and inked with a fine point pen. He is particular about what pens he uses. The lack of indentations in his writing means he did not write them in anger.

Just studying his handwriting feels sinful. The way he writes my name so effortlessly, as though he’s been writing it his whole life. Like I’m reading something so personal, something I’m not supposed to see, although it’s my name.

The doorbell rings, startling me from my trance. My phone chimes as the camera pops up on the screen with a picture of Alpha Laiken standing at my door. I jump out of the seat and rush to the door.

“Hey!” I greet him, but his face is unreadable. “I believe this package belongs to you.” He hands me the open box that my vibrator came in.

“No, no. I don’t think that’s what I ordered.” I shake my head, the blood rushing to my cheeks in embarrassment.

“Sutton,” he raises his brow at me. “I obviously did not order this, and the box clearly has your name…”

“I’m mortified.” I slap my hand over my mouth, spreading my fingers over my cheeks, trying to cover up the redness. I open the door wider and invite him in.

“Did you change or put on perfume? You smell really nice,” Alpha Laiken comments as he walks into the living room and follows me into the kitchen.

“No perfume, just a shower and a change of clothes.” I take the box from him and hand him his unopened one. “If you saw my name on the box, why’d you open it?”

“I opened it first, then read the name,” he explains, inching closer to me. He pins me between him and the table until my ass is pressed up against the edge. “Although, if you’re looking for that kind of release, I would be more than willing to oblige.”

His tantalizing, gravelly voice sends chills crawling up my spine. His green eyes stare into my own like he wants to devour me, and I might just let him. Everything about him has me clenching my thighs. I arch my back, placing my hands behind me to support my weight.

“I might take you up on it.” The words leave my mouth as my heart races, breathing in his overpowering scent. It’s familiar, like lime or lemon and cedar. I bite my lip. He does the same, the letters and box forgotten. Ani remains waiting, only so I can compare Laiken’s kiss to his.

Laiken leans down, and I bring my right hand forward, brushing the letters off the table. The letters fly to the ground, the light noise enough to distract us. Laiken’s eyes land on the handwritten letters that are lying next to his feet. He picks them up and reads the name of the sender.

Oddly, my chest tightens, afraid he’ll compromise their contents. Ani’s letters are meant for me. They’re my sacred artifacts.

He returns the letters to the table and sets his eyes on the box.

“Still haven’t opened the box?” He walks away and places his hand on the table. His eyes land on mine, swallowing as he bites his cheek. I know that’s not the question he wants to ask.

“I was going to read the letters first,” I answer. He looks down at the letters.

“Ana-stay-she-o?” He attempted to say Ani’s name.

“Anastacio… Ash Valencia.” I thin my lips, pining both between my teeth. s**t, I have to tell him everything. I mentally prepare for the line of questioning.

“Interesting. Why is Alpha Ash writing love letters to you?”

“I don’t think they’re love letters.”

“In this world of technology, handwritten letters translate into love letters.”

“Well. If they’re considered love letters, then he wouldn’t have rejected me.” I don’t tell the whole truth. He did say he rejects me. He just didn’t finish the sentence.

Alpha Laiken straightens his back at my words. Being rejected is not a common thing, but it happens. Mates are not rare, but not everyone finds theirs. Some wolves go their whole lives without finding their mate.

“Considering that he’s asked permission to enter my territory and showed up anyway and I still denied him a visit with you,” he thinks aloud, turning his back to me. With a hand on his hip and the other at his chin, he faces me again. “There has to be more to it, Sutton. He wouldn’t do all that if he rejected you. Why the f**k would anyone reject their mate?”

“It’s a long story,” I briefly explain.

“That’s the same s**t you said earlier.” He moves closer to me, searching my eyes for the truth, and the truth is more complicated than I am willing to share. “Did you accept the rejection?”

“No. He didn’t finish.” I shake my head as tears well in my eyes. “He started to say them, but stopped after he said my name. He couldn’t finish the words. I couldn’t say them either. I’ve been ignoring his calls and messages.”

“So, he’s resorted to writing to you?”

“It appears so, and he sent me the box.” I hold out my hand in its direction.

“Sutton,” he huffed, trying to think of something to say. He looks around the room, anywhere but at me. “Do you want me to stay while you open it?”

“I would rather be alone,” I give him a soft smile, hoping it will deescalate his frustration. He simply presses his lips together and nods at my response.

“Then I should go.” He walks out of the kitchen. A second later, I hear the door close behind him. I stare at the empty kitchen doorway he just walked out of. I notice that Alpha Laiken dropped Ani’s letter on the floor again, and I pick it up. Is he upset that I had a mate that I refused to be with?

After Alpha Laiken’s fingers were all over the letters and his reaction, I rather just open the box. I walk over to the knife drawer and grab a paring knife. I stab into the tape that sealed the box closed, gliding it down the slit. Inside, I found a wrapped present with Happy Birthday written all over it. There are also three vacuumed sealed bags with clothing and a note.

Sutton,

I’m sorry.

The first time I met you, the night you arrived at Belview Creek, I opened the door, and it was love at first sight. You were wearing a blue cropped T-shirt and shorts. I couldn’t take my eyes off you. It was March, and we had gone outside to hang out around the fire pit. You were cold, and didn’t say anything, but I watched as you rubbed your hands on your arms. I went inside and brought you one of my hoodies. You smiled, said thank you, and put it on.

That night, you were so interested in my telescope that we had sitting out on the porch. You asked if you could look through it, and I watched as Oscar taught you how to use it. I was jealous because I wanted to be the one standing that close to you.

When Oscar told me you two were dating, everything went dark. There was no reason to smile. I shut myself off because the girl I was in love with was dating my little brother. I was jealous.

I lost the love of my life, brother, and best friends all in that moment. I need you to know that to understand everything I’ve done since then.

Each of the items in the box reminds me of you. You borrowed them for one reason or another, and Oscar was not very big at offering you whatever you needed. So, I always lent you mine. Your scent lingered in them for weeks, and they were my favorite things to wear, only after you had worn them.

But they no longer smell like you. Maybe, just maybe, they’d remind you of me and we can be one step closer to being together.

BTW. Happy Late Birthday.

Yours,

Ani.

Yes, I used your nickname for me. I didn’t know how much I would miss you saying it.

I grab the bag with a white and navy-blue hoodie he let me barrow me the first night we met and open it. Immediately, I am hit with my favorite smell. Freshly peeled oranges on a rainy summer day. I don’t realize I’m crying until I remove the jacket from my face and see the tear stains. I leave the others in their bags, so when his scent disappears from this one, I have two others.

I replace my hoodie with this one; the hem hitting just below my ass cheeks. Then I pull out the present and open it without a second thought. It was a brand-new telescope. The newer version of the one he has now. The note attached to the bow says.

We can look at the moon together.