Pretend to be subtle.
1549 Words
~Oreva~
For over a week, I've been avoiding Professor Roshan's classes like a plague, though I know I'm doing more harm to myself than good. My attendance scores, my grades, my scholarship, every damn thing, including my sanity is at stake. I should have skipped the class, faked my own death, lied I lost my oxygen tank.... Anything just to be absent as usual.
But here I am, seated in his class and trying to stay invisible between other students on the last row. My oxygen tank hums beside me, reminding me life still has me in its grasp, even if it's just by a hair's breadth.
Arielle is sitting on the front row as usual, putting on a top that exposes her round bossom. She's adding finishing touches to her makeup and smiling sheepishly at Rick who's on the seat closely beside hers. She flashes me mocking gazes at intervals and I roll my eyes each time.
Finally, he walks in on time like he always does, striding gracefully with no dramatic flair. Just a crisp black shirt, the kind that clings slightly at the chest and creases at the elbows, tucked in slacks. He oozes the kind of energy that makes the air feel thinner and I adjust in my seat, suddenly begining to feel uncomfortable.
I hang my head low, fixing my gaze on nothing in particular. Anything to distract myself from staring at this walking sin who has found a way to engrave himself in my thoughts. He doesn't spare me a glance. He doesn't flinch, he pays no attention each time he walks past me and it feels even worse. My eyes dart subconsciously to that part of his body...
That shouldn't be my focus, but I can't help it. Covered with the sleek black pants now, I still envision how red, huge and veiny it looked.
Holy s**t! I am gonna die in this class. I suddenly avert my gaze the moment I feel the weight of his stare and I return my attention to the gibberish I have been scribbling on my book, while pretending to be writing.
He walks away and continues to teach like nothing happened. Like I didn't walk in on the most sexy and equally traumatizing Greek-god moment of my life. His Baritone voice is smooth, deep and deliberate. His slender fingers move with graceful strokes as he writes on the board and each time he calls on a student, my heart beats rapidly. His golden eyes scan the room slowly. Slow enough to make me nervous and my palm, sleek with sweat.
I spend the entire lecture trying to avoid meeting his gaze like it is a death sentence. My lungs feel tighter and my legs are like jelly. I have never been so ill at ease in my nineteen years of existence. The moment he calls it a day, a relieved sigh escapes my lips and I grab my belongings and quickly set out for the door, trying to blend amongst my classmates.
This is the best moment to slip out of this awkward classroom and stay worlds away from him like I always do, if my sanity must be kept. My oxygen tank is wheezing too loudly and I feel it'll give me off so I lift it off the floor and increase my pace.
Just when I think I have finally escaped—
"Miss Oreva."
His voice brings me to a halt by the doorpost like shackles around my ankle. My body freezes and I rub my sweaty palm against the hem of my dress. I turn slowly, just like one turns towards looming danger.
He actually knows my name? I could have sworn he knew nothing about my existence with the way he'd always stroll past me like I'm insignificant.
The classroom is now empty. Just him and me.
He stands by the desk with a smug look. Expression unreadable.
His golden eyes never leave mine.
"Come here."
Every fibre of my being is screaming "no!" but my legs move on their own accord. I want to run as far from him as possible but my body betrays me. I move towards him, oxygen tank moving slowly beside me like it's nervous too. My fingers tremble around the handle and my throat is dry.
I pause by the wall beside him because I know I'll melt if I move an inch closer. He tilts his gaze to meet mine and I freeze, heart thudding loudly.
Now, his voice is low, soft and dangerous.
"How long are you going to keep pretending?"
My throat tightens as I try to make an utterance.
"I don't know what you're taking about, Professor..."
A silent scoff escapes his slender lips and in a movement too smooth and swift, he steps forward and presses his hand against the wall beside my head, trapping me.
My lashes flutter and my breath turns shallow. This closeness.... It feels surreal.
"You saw something that wasn't meant for you." His golden eyes are about to see through my soul. I gulp without giving him a response because I don't trust my voice.
"You shouldn't have been there," He continues, like he doesn't notice I'm on the verge of passing out under his piercing gaze. Damn it! He actually knows— more like he wants me to pass out.
I nod and finally find my voice, "I know– I just... I'm sorry, I was– I missed your test and I came to ask for a resit, I didn't mean to look... I just heard a noise, and–"
"Stop." He orders and I gulp, swallowing the completion of my stutter.
He leans in a little, close enough for me to smell the dark musk of his cologne. A sweet smell of pine and sandalwood.
"I don't need an explanation,"
Okay... But why is he so close?
His voice drops, "If you are going to keep secrets, you need to do it better."
"But I didn't tell any—"
"I know." He says and my brows squint. How is he so sure? "Yet." He adds, his gaze sharpening like he wants to see through my skull. Like he's searching for something only he knows about.
"And if you're going to keep gawking at me like that, Miss Oreva... At least, pretend to be subtle."
My lungs betray me and my chest heaves. Holy s**t! I have been gawking all this while? My cheeks are as red as a lobster and I gently bit my inner cheek, too embarrassed to lift my gaze. I peep sideways at the corridor to check if anyone is in sight but it's clear and I let out a sigh. This man doesn't even care about us being seen in this compromising position.
"You are free to leave," He finally murmurs after a long pause.
I don't breathe till I've fled the classroom, dragging my wheezing tank behind me like a frightened pet. My heartbeat is still in my ears, thud. thud. thud. matching the weight of his words.
"At least, pretend to be subtle," That sounded like a warning and a challenge.
I take a sharp turn down the hallways, trying to find a place to hide my flushed face. That's when I crash into a huge figure. Broad shoulders, sweet fragrance, familiar warmth.....Rick.
Of everyone I can bump into in this awkward moment, all worked up and sweaty, looking like a panicked pet.... why Rick? Of course! The universe hates me.
He reaches out instinctively, helping me regain my balance. "Hey, you okay?"
I blink up at him, breath caught between my lungs and nervousness. He's looking at me like I'm a fragile ware that might break.
"I'm fine," I lie, almost tripping over my tank as I step back quickly.
He eyes my tank and then, me. "Are you sure? You look paler than usual."
Woah... Where's that coming from? Does that mean he has actually paid attention to me?
Snap out of it, Oreva.
He scratches the back of his neck awkwardly before parting his lips... Those thin lips that used to hold me spellbound. "hmm.... I know I haven't really spoken to you, but I've seen you around and I saw Arielle being.... Arielle."
Ugh? So that's what this is all about. Pity.
I fake a smile. "Thanks, I'm good."
He hesitates for a while, "If you ever need anything... Help, notes, whatever. You can ask me.."
Seeing him stutter is so awkward and surprisingly adorable. It would have meant the whole world to me yesterday before Roshan's voice found a way to tangle itself into my bloodstream and before I realised my crush on Rick might be safer, because Roshan is the danger I can't ignore.
I nod faintly. "Thanks, Rick. I'll keep that in mind."
He flashes me a crooked smile and jogs off in all swagger to meet his folks on the field, effortless and perfect as usual.
And I?
I'm left standing here, my mind a total mess and even breathless for various reasons than I was a while ago.
Rick has finally given me his attention like I always wanted. Why don't I have butterflies in my stomach like I thought I would all this while?
- Writer
