The Lycan's Maid

Chapter 5

Two weeks later…

DJ’s POV

I wish I could say that I hadn’t been moping around for the last two weeks but--- damn it!

I had!

I’d been a freaking moping monster! Sulking at work and dragged my feet and did everything I could to avoid being at home. Because no matter how much I aired out the small apartment or how much air freshener I used, the lingering scent of the male-that-shall-not-be-named remained.

I hated to admit it, but I had to face it. Or at least consider it. I’d met my Beloved! And he didn’t want me for anything more than a one-night stand. That realization hurt WAY more than it should. It was just one night, for goddess sake! And shouldn’t I be glad that my true love had walked away from me? The last time I’d given the whole “true love” thing a try, I ended up not only heartbroken but with a broken pack as well.

And only to make matters worse, now I was facing another dilemma now as well…

Luka’s Alpha Ceremony.

Basically, it was just a big party for all the werewolves in the pack to get together while Luka vowed to protect them, lie down his life for them, and yadda, yadda, yadda… And at the ceremony, he’d officially make his Soul Bound Mate – the just barely legal and pregnant witch, Cat – his official Luna. It was as good as any human wedding and if what Mom told me had any merit, he was going to claim her in front of the entire pack.

Something told me he was definitely possessive enough to pull something like that!

Apparently, Luka had gone from being disconnected from his wolf his entire life to being so in tune with him that they shared a single mind – much like LJ and his Dire Wolf. Luka didn’t say “we” as the King did, but every time he spoke he was talking for him and his wolf, being so in tune with each other that one was like an extension of the other. And with all that animal instinct riding him, he probably wanted to make it extremely clear to everyone in the pack, that he was mated, and his mate was Catelyn…

Sighing, I flipped the invitation between my fingers one more time, watching as the integrated design moved in the light. Clearly, this was one of mom’s inventions, and – unless someone had lied to me – she was probably also the one planning the whole thing. Cat wasn’t the type of girl who wanted a big show, I sensed, and knowing Luka, he would be fine with showing up with nothing but his mate on his arms.

I missed them…

That wasn’t something new. I always missed my brothers and parents, but suddenly I felt like I was missing OUT on them. Landon had found his Beloved and they were happily ruling as King and Queen of the vampires. After taking out the last Elder and his clan, Landon established a new rule among the vampires, with him as their king. Seeing that most vampires had grown sick and tired of their old ways, they jumped on the new age wagon. Of course, there were those who didn’t approve, since now it was a punishable crime to mistreat a pet and several vampires had gone rogue because of that, but with the cool head on his head, he was taking care of it.

LJ had reestablished the court as it had been in the old days. There was a steady stream of people coming and going to the Palace now, making several small industries such as local restaurants and shops bloom. Sure, most people didn’t know that it were supernaturals’ that suddenly were streaming in and out of town, but the collective werewolf society appreciated the change one hell of a lot. And with the gorgeous Erika by his side, LJ seemed more focused and grounded in his work. I knew that he often came off like a goof and didn’t have a serious bone in his body, but underneath it all, LJ was fiercely protective of the people he loved. Which sadly made him a very lonely person, since nobody thought there was anything more to him than what met the eye. Erika seemed to ease that loneliness and stood with him, no matter what they faced ahead.

Luka had easily and instantly taken over the alpha role and led the Black Lunar pack with a firm and just hand, just like Dad. He’d even made Dad his official liaise between the Palace and the pack, so Dad’s wolf wouldn’t feel restless and unimportant. Not that I had any worries about Dad, now that Mom was pregnant again. I could only imagine how protective and possessive he would be. He’d fuss over her until he was driving her and her wolf nuts.

And yeah, she’d love every single second of it…

However, with all of this good news, I felt sort of left behind. Everyone seemed to move forward with their life. Getting mated, finding their place in life, and starting something new…

Everyone – except me!

And it didn’t help matter much that my gut twisted in pain, every time I thought about Ivan. About the guy I suspected was my Fated Beloved yet had left me after our amazing night together. Whose scent seemed to cling to my skin and who had my wolf--- Well, actually, my wolf was very quiet and had retreated far back into my mind. I hadn’t heard of seen her since that morning two weeks ago. I suspected that she was depressed and ashamed since this wasn’t the first time we’d been pining after a man who turned out to be an utter and complete moron! And that should make me hate Mr. Too-hot-for-his-Russian-ass, but instead, I found myself dreaming about him and waking up in the morning with my p***y throbbing to have his thick length inside of me again.

Stupid, DJ. Stupid!

And I hadn’t even addressed the OTHER issue yet. The fact that nobody in Black Lunar wanted me back home. It hurt as a social animal, that my pack had collectively rejected me and made me an outcast in my own home. But I couldn’t blame them. Everything that had happened had been my fault. Those who died? Their blood was on my hand. Everything that had been the aftermath of that night 8 years ago, it was all on me. Sure, Mom and Dad claimed that it wasn’t, but I’d been old enough at the time to read between the lines. And to watch my Dad come home night after night, covered in wounds, bruises, and blood… Seeing my Mom’s face as she took him into her embrace and clean him up---

To see them die a little bit at the time…

It’d been too much…!

I picked up my phone but hesitated to press the speed-dial for my brothers. I wasn’t ready to go home and with all of this hounding me, I didn’t feel like this was the time to face my past either. And I doubted I would ever be ready, but I also felt guilty for ditching out on Luka’s ceremony like that.

Would he hate me?

Knowing Luka, he wouldn’t. he’d always been the most understanding of all of my brothers, seeing as he had a s**t load of guilt to battle himself. He would understand.

But the others…

Groaning and bracing myself, I pushed the button and put the phone to my ear.

“DJ!” LJ exclaimed on the second ring. “Goddess! We’ve missed you, big sis!”

There were two more bibs and I heard Luka and Landon greet me in their own way.

“Hi, Stone Gang,” I said, hoping to keep the sadness out of my voice. “What’s up?”

“If you have us all here,” Landon sighed, and I could easily picture him slumping back in his chair with his tousled, unruly hair and all too revealing eyes. “I’m guessing you’re canceling ahead of time?”

Ok…

That stung!

“Don’t be an ass, Landon,” Luka replied and as always, his voice revealed nothing about his true emotions. “I’ll understand that you don’t want to be here, DJ. It’s ok.”

That stung even worse!

Sure, I’d call to cancel but-but---

Damn it!

I sigh and bit back tears. I knew they never had blamed me for anything that had happened, but in many ways, they didn’t approve of me staying away. In their eyes, I wasn’t just choosing to stay away from the pack, but from them as well. They didn’t understand that it wasn’t them I wanted to be away from, but it was just too hard for me to look everyone in the eyes and---

“No, it’s not,” LJ growled and I could practically see him pacing the room. “Seriously DJ! You’re going to run forever---?”

“I’m not running,” I snapped, bristling at the comment that made me out as some kind of coward. Then, realizing that this was quickly heading into the land of “bawling my eyes out over the phone” and “confessions that they’d never understand anyway”- territory, I quickly swallowed the pain and plastered on a cheery smile as I continued: “I’m working. And what’s wrong with me enjoying life a little?”

“Nothing,” Luka quickly came to my defense and huffed a curse at our two younger brothers. “Cut it out you two! Or so help me, I’ll come over there and kick both your asses!”

I could just cry in relief.

Thank the goddess for Luka…

“It’s a lame excuse,” Landon snarled back, his voice thick with disappointment. “Sorry Luka, but I’m with LJ on this! DJ, you can’t keep avoiding the issue forever! It was ok when you missed a birthday, and hell, nobody said a word when you started missing out on our graduation and holidays, but when does it end?” My heart clenched and I hated the hurt I could hear in his voice… “How much of our lives are you going to skip out on, DJ? Are our kids going to grow up not knowing their aunt?”

I held the phone out from my face and fought to keep the tears at bay.

I was not about to cry.

I was NOT about to cry, damn it!

“Shut your f*****g mouth, Landon,” Luka growled and for the first time ever, he let some of his anger sound in his voice. “If it’s so easy to be somewhere where you’re bullied for something that’s not your fault, why don’t you move back here, Landon? I’m sure we could find a room for you somewhere!”

A stunned silence followed that statement, as everybody seemed to chew on the new alpha’s words. A part of me was proud, hearing how Luka always seemed to be able to look at the big picture, despite his own feelings. Because no matter what he said, I knew it also hurt him that I wasn’t coming, yet he defended me…

“If you need more time to heal,” LJ said softly, with a tone of resignation. “We’ll understand…”

“I’m sorry if I pushed it too hard, Janie,” Landon also said, but there was a heavy tone of defeat in his voice that felt like a dagger to my already bruised heart. “It’s just--- I really miss you!”

“We all do,” LJ supplied. “We love you.”

“We all love you no matter what, DJ,” Luka reassured me, and sighed. “But I do get where Landon and LJ are coming from. My mate is already pregnant and I don’t want my son or daughter to grow up not knowing their most awesome aunt.”

We all snickered at that and despite the hurt in my chest I also felt relieved. They weren’t going to pressure me into coming home. A part of me was happy about that. Another part---

“I love you too,” I said, hoping that they didn’t hear the tears that were streaming down my face. “All of you.”

“Talk to you later sis,” they said, each one in their own unique way and hung up. I did the same, grabbed a pillow, and hid my face in it, as I cried and cried until my tears had all dried out.

I loved them!

I really did, but---

I just couldn’t be with them…