Just Another Day

Chapter 2- Getting Emotions Back Into Control

I'm thinking of just another day with the same stupid things. I'm just wondering when everything is going to change for the better, because yes, I'm getting older and I just turned fifty years old. I feel like I'm like aged wine. I only get better as I age, but unfortunately, I'm the only one that feels like this. The majority of the world feels like I have to be put to pasture because I'm old. I don't look fifty so why do I have to be treated like everyone else. That’s just my opinion though, because reality knocking at my door. Tell me this, who wants to hire a 50 year old with no experience. I'll tell you it's NO ONE!!! I feel doomed, I don't know what to do. Then I shake my head and say to myself, "What doesn't kill me makes me stronger." Then I most be Fort Knox strong, because wow, my life is amazing and not in a good way. Most people in my shoes would have committed suicide, start using drugs or going to a psychiatrist.

There are four groups of doctors that I will not ever see, and I'll tell you why. A marriage counselor because most of them have not ever been married, and usually wind up having affairs with their clients, and then they're the ones responsible for the marriage that end in divorce. The next one is a child psychiatrist, that's if I had a child with mental issues, which thank God I don't have any children. They usually don't have children and they're also single also. I have a cousin, poor thing. She's been going to psychiatrists since she's been 2 yrs old. She's still not all right in the head department. If I ever had children would have made sure that my children would not have to go to a psychiatrist at all. I think that I would have made a good parent. My cats are a good testament to how attentive I would have been. The other one would be a psychiatrist. For some reason they always need one themselves, because the can't handle their own problems, so how are they going to help solve your problems. And finally, a nutritionist. Once when my Janelle after having Greg Jr, she had a problem losing weight, so her doctor referred her to a nutritionist. She wanted her whole family to be there with her. I was beside myself when I saw that the person to help my sister lose weight looked like a beached whale, and she was wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. The back of her hand had tartar sauce on it. She just had eaten a fish filet meal from McDonald's with a large fry. The whole office smelt of fried fish and fries. I totally lost it and gave her a piece of my mind. After, that episode she went on a month long mental wellness sabbatical because apparently I made her cry and have a mental breakdown. Janelle decided that having the family present is not good. She didn't invite us to go with her anymore. I hope she lost some weight at the sabbatical . Hopefully, it was a lesson learned for her giving advice to losing weight and eating right when she did the opposite of her advice. I remember Janelle was fuming at me, I tell it like it is. That's one of the reasons why Janelle hates going to toe with me in confrontations because I don't hold anything back. That's one trait that I inherited from my mom. Mom tells it like it is all the time. You have to have thick skin to live with mom. I'm sure she could make anyone walk onto oncoming traffic.

It's just another day in my life. Some people might find my life boring, but at least what you see is what you get. I love how all of these resting b***h faced women sucker a guy into their web of lies and deceit and endless despair. They make the guy and everyone around them think that they are cool, but in reality it's not so. Behind closed doors they make their family's lives a living hell. I should know this because Janelle is the perfect example of this. I feel bad for foe my nieces and nephews. I can't imagine life with her now. Janelle always loved stealing away my boyfriends, because they all look like they came from a GQ magazine. I attracted them because they like my easy going personality and I'm also easy on the eyes. I usually go with guys that are younger than me, because I really don't like guys that are the same age or older than me. I feel that why should I go with someone my age or older when I look and feel younger.

I feel that I might be in love with my boyfriend Matthew Blackwell who is 27 years old, we looked perfect together. We both looked the same age. I just didn't know what was going on when he started ghosting me, when my sister started talking about divorce. I noticed that she started to set her eyes on MY BOYFRIEND!!! The audacious b***h!!! I don't know why so surprised when she always did this to me before she got married, but thought she had changed. I guess that's wishful thinking. I missed when Matt and I were inseparable we were total FIRE. We were two peas in a pod, so I thought. Out of no where he starts ghosting me and Janelle looks at me with a smirk on her face, and I know now why she's been looking at me like that. I can't believe that she's taken Matt from me. I need to get my emotions under control before things get out of control. I haven't felt this way in long time. I need to go behind the scenes and see why Janelle wants a divorce and why Matt is ghosting me and see if both are linked to my wonderful sister Janelle.