The Price Of Forever

Chapter 2: I'm Sorry I Can't '

Cole's POV

Vanessa's rejection echoed in my mind repeatedly, leaving me with a million questions unanswered.

My heart pounded like it was on a steady drum roll and my brows furrowed as I pressed hard on the car’s accelerator.

The street lights reflected in my car as I sped by and the cool night breeze washed over my face but none of it could calm the storm inside of me.

My fingers circled around the steering wheel but they still trembled, for the first time in my life, I was breaking down.

I'd never imagined I'd lose the love of my life because I was always so careful, I tried my best to be perfect for her and I always ensured she was never sad so where did I go wrong?

Vanessa never showed any signs of being tired of me. Hell, she was even so happy to be spending time with me so why did she leave?

‘Was she really happy or she was just pretending?’ I wondered as I made a U turn, headed towards the direction of my home.

I took a drag of short, hot breaths as my jaw tightened. I couldn't make sense of my thoughts and for a moment, it felt like the car was compressing itself, making me feel suffocated.

We'd known each other for so long and we were the perfect match, everyone around literally admired us except my mother but she only meant well.

My mother wanted Vanessa to be better for me and I didn't have a problem with it as Vanessa never complained so why did she reject my proposal?

I know she has always wanted to take our relationship further.

So what changed?

Until now, I had thought Vanessa and I shared similar dreams— achieving great heights in our careers and then getting married.

But right now, all the promises, all the words, they all made pain rush through my veins, making my heart throb with aching.

I stopped the car as a result of the traffic lights. I lowered my head on the steering. My temple pulsate as the headache increased but I was too overwhelmed by my thoughts to be concerned about it.

All I could think of was Vanessa—her face, her beautiful blue eyes, her smile, her wavy black hair. Every time I pushed back the image to the back of my mind, it bounced back with flashes from different moments we shared.

As I opened my eyes, I quickly picked my phone, I dialed her number, my body welled up in tension as the phone rang.

‘Please pick up, please...’ I hoped internally as my knuckles flexed around the edges of my cell phone.

But there was no response.

I dialed her number multiple times but it either directed to the voicemail or it got disconnected.

“Where are you?” I muttered under my breath as I laid my head on the car's headrest.

Vanessa wasn't replying to her texts, nor was she picking her calls. I wasn't only concerned about her sudden refusal to get married to me like she had always wanted,

I was also concerned about her whereabouts. It was unlike Vanessa to not pick up her phone.

The honking of vehicles from behind me snapped me from my daze and I realized that the traffic lights were now green.

I turned on my ignition and continued my journey but my heart was still heavy.

After what seemed like minutes, I arrived home.

Due to the suffocating feeling I had been experiencing from the car, I started undressing myself right from the moment I walked in—something that was seriously out of my character.

“Carl…what's wrong? What happened?” My mother called out to me but I really didn't want to talk right now.

I was restless. I paced back and forth as I kept trying to reach Vanessa but she was still not picking up her phone.

“Argh! f**k this!” I scowled as I threw my phone across the living room.

I dragged my hair in a fit to calm the frustration I felt but it only made the headache worse.

“Carl, will you keep walking around the room like that or you'd sit and come talk to me?” My mother inquired softly but with authority.

Her question wasn't giving me the opportunity to choose because if I ignored her again, she'd make me sit and force the words out of me.

Without a word, I took a seat on the couch with my elbows resting on my knees.

“Good.” Following her statement, she took a seat beside me.

“Now tell me, what happened at the restaurant? How did your proposal go?” She asked as she rubbed a palm down my back.

I clasped my hands together while trying my best to not replay the memory but my brain failed me. I could see everything just the way it happened.

“She…she rejected me.”

The next thing that followed my words were a loud gasp from my mother.

I turned my gaze to her and something in her expression felt like she was feigning it but at the same time, she was probably unable to believe it as well.

“Why on earth would she do that? You guys were a power couple so why would she hurt you like this?”

These questions seemed to pierce my heart even more.

A deep sigh escaped my lips as I placed my head over my clasped hands.

“I know right? I'm just as surprised as you.”

“Awwh…dear, I'm so sorry for what happened. But maybe it's for the best, not to worry you'd find someone else.”

Someone else?

I didn't want any other person but her!

I shook my head from ear to ear, “Mom, you know that's not possible, she's the only person that I love and I just want to be with her.”

My mother's lips curled into a frown as she stared at me, “Listen to me son. I will not raise a man who's weakened by love.

So what if Vanessa left you?

It doesn't mean you should whine and be worried about it all day.

If nothing, you should feel it's her loss, okay?”

I nodded softly but none of what she said settled in my heart.

Call me a crazy man but I still wanted to find her.

To know why.

I pressed my lips together into a thin line, “You're right mom. But can I at least use your line to call her? I've been calling her but she hasn't been picking up so can I just give it one more try?”

My mom hesitated.

She shook her head from side to side as if to say no, but knowing me very well, she slowly nodded.

My body tensed, “Mom, please…I really need to talk to her, please..” I tightened my hands around my mother's hands.

“You only get to call her once and if she doesn't respond, that's it. Alright?”

“Sure, sure.” I smiled as she handed me her phone but I knew I was nowhere near stopping even if she didn't pick up.

Yes, I was frustrated but I was still bent on reaching out until Vanessa finally answered my call.

“And you'd also do exactly as I say from now on because this wouldn't have happened if you listened to me in the first place.”

“Sure, sure.” I broke the embrace with a small smile as she handed me her phone.

I would say or do anything to get her approval as long as I can be with the woman I love.

With trembling hands, I dialed Vanessa's number on my mother's phone, rising up to pace around the room but my mother pulled me back to sit.

I held my breath.

‘Dear God, Please… let her just pick up,’ I silently prayed as the phone vibrated in my ear.

“Hello?” I exhaled as I heard a familiar voice as the call got connected and relief washed over me.

“Hi..hi…this is Carl. Vanessa…what happened? Why did you leave like that?” I questioned immediately in fear that she might disconnect the call.

“Carl? This is Betty.” Realizing the voice was indeed familiar but not Vanessa's made my heart sink.

“Oh- Betty. Can you please pass the phone to Vanessa? I'd really like to talk to her.” I circled a palm over my left knee as I talked.

“No, she doesn't want to talk to you.”

“Please. Just this once. I honestly need to know why she left me tonight.” I begged, forgetting the fact that my mother hated when I did that.

“You really want to know? Well, Vanessa left you tonight because she doesn't need you anymore. It'd be better if you moved on because she already has.”

Those words hit me like a stray bullet, ripping my heart apart beyond control.

The phone in my hand, dropped to the couch as the words replayed in my brain.

Vanessa…moved ..moved on?

How?

“What did she say?” My mother's question snapped me out of my thoughts.

While staring at her, I could have sworn I saw a small smile but my vision blurred with tears so I wasn't sure if I saw correctly.

‘Men don't cry.’ I recalled my mother's statement and I blinked them back before she could notice.

“Umm…uhh…it's just, nothing really.” I tried to make excuses but I was pretty bad at it.

“Oh? So why do you look like a wet cat? You're sweating so much and your eyes are glistening. Tell me what she said.”

My profile hardened as my lips parted, “It wasn't her. It was her best friend and she said to move on because Vanessa already moved on.”

“Really? That's pathetic.

“So what are you going to do now?”