The Runaway Boy

CHAPTER SEVEN

CHAPTER SEVEN

TOMMY HADN'T MADE it that far from the house before the exhaustion yet again set in. Instead, he and Mason sat on the beach just down the road, the house still in view. It wasn't beach weather, the sky was grey, and a salty mist hung in the air. Tommy pulled his knees to his chest and leaned his chin on top, watching the waves crash on the shore. Mason sat in silence next to him, still as quiet but strong as ever. Tommy clenched and unclenched the fingers that had once been interlocked with his.

He felt as though he was losing his mind. This wasn't the way he did things. He didn't get attached to the people he stayed with because every time he had in the past - they ended up dead. Now he had his Uncle here - the man who broke his heart. And he had these people around him who gave their patience over to him, who despite knowing his family's brutality first hand, asked him to stay. And Mason. God was Mason all-consuming. Tommy had thought him to be arrogant at first, but he had misjudged him then. It wasn't arrogance, (well, maybe a little) but an understanding that ate away at him in the same way it did Tommy.

He didn't scold him for being so harsh on Christian, or for basically accusing them all of only looking after him to bring the Sinclair family down - like Tommy thought he would. He had hoped that when he dropped the folder into his lap, he would tell him to leave, that it was all he had wanted from him. At least that would've been easier. Instead, he held him, his steady hand behind his neck as he let all his anger out on his Uncle.

Tommy so badly wanted to walk back to the house and apologize for what he said, but he knew he couldn't. He wouldn't let himself because he meant every word of it, even if it was harsh. He had tried to avoid this altogether, he had tried to ignore the feelings eating away at him every time he saw Christian. But he couldn't do it anymore, and he hated every word he said, he hated it most because he meant it, he hated how all the good memories from his childhood included him, and how now they were all tainted. Tommy couldn't stop his body from trembling at the thought of all the words he said and forced his eyes to stay open and on the ocean, even when the tears began to fall.

"I can't forgive him," Tommy choked out, pressing his hand over his mouth in an attempt to swallow back the sobs.

"Nobody expects you too, you just have to trust him and if you can't do that, then trust me, haven't I proven that much?" Mason turned his attention from the beach to Tommy, his shoulder bumping slightly against his own.

Tommy turned his gaze away as he thought about his answer. His eyes lingering on the dock house, a weatherbeaten cube of in nineteenth-century grandeur. It was raised up out of the ocean by out-curving support beams for the purpose of enabling elderly ladies to sit out on pleasant afternoons to watch the sailboats leaning at their work - it was something that he might've wanted to paint if he ever picked up a brush again, though with the way his hands had trembled non-stop for the past years he doubted that would ever happen. He let his mind drift only momentarily to the fact that his mother would like this small town, she would've painted every inch of it if she had the chance. 

"I will let you know when I see you follow through on that deal and I get to break that asshole Sam's nose again," Tommy forced a smile while smudging his cheek against his shoulder to get rid of the tears.

"I'll make sure of it."

Pain lolled through his side where his ribs ached, the pain medication and hangover finally beginning to wear off. He readjusted himself slightly, tightening an arm around his shins, he knocked his side against Mason's slightly, but it didn't seem to warrant a reaction from him in the slightest. Tommy didn't know why he expected Mason to lash out at him for the smallest of things, but he thought that if he did, he might be even more shocked for it. Tommy thought him to be extremely confusing.

"I don't get you, or your mood swings," Tommy muttered, turning his head to the side and resting it on his knees, blatantly watching Mason.

"I don't have mood swings, you are just putting it together now because I didn't take that folder, that I genuinely want to help you," Mason replied, his eyebrows furrowing.

"Why are you helping me?"

"Why are you letting me?" Tommy stared at Mason, stunned by that response. He didn't know the answer, he just felt drawn to him in a way he had never felt towards anyone before. He thought it foolish. Maybe it was just a crush. It's not like Mason would see him that way anyways, not with the way he looked like he could drop dead at any rate.

"God, stop overthinking," Mason chuckled slightly, which took Tommy even more by surprise. He quickly wiped his eyes dry on his jacket and sighed, he wanted to hear that laugh again... Yeah, this was just a stupid crush.

"I don't get it," Tommy muttered under his breath, sounding frustrated but not at Mason's teasing, it was directed entirely at the way his heart was current smashing against his ribs.

"I know the types of things your brother does to people and nobody deserves that. I know you think you do for some reason, but you don't," Mason explained, his words carefully articulated as if not to give anything away.

Tommy wanted to ask what Mason had been through in the past because he had a pretty good feeling that it included Jonathan, but he didn't. He thought that maybe, one day, Mason would tell him on his own accord - and wasn't that a thought? That one day - as if he expected himself to wait for that day as if he was really going to be here still, or alive even to earn Mason's trust. And yet, he was hopeful for it. He'd always been told that hope was a dangerous and unrequited thing, and here he was yearning after it... That maybe this small town and the people here were enticing him towards it.

"Are you going to stay again?" Tommy asked before he could stop himself, it was the first thing he could think of saying apart from carrying on the conversation about Jonathan. He kept his eyes forward, even when he felt Mason watching him still.

"Do you want me too?" Mason replied yet again with another question as if he was not phased in the slightest by Tommy's abruptness - maybe that's why he continued to speak without thinking.

"Yes, I slept better than I have in a long time," Tommy wondered how long it would take to bury his head under the sand, words were just slipping out of his mouth, and he felt his whole face turn a bright shade of pink.

"You're blushing."

"You held my hand all night." Tommy attempted to bite back with stating the obvious, tried to embarrass Mason as much as he was.

"Because you needed me too," Tommy stared back at him, the shock must've been written all over his face because Mason raised an eyebrow and huffed in exasperation. He kept his mouth shut, not knowing what would come out if he spoke, whatever it was he knew that Mason was right and there was no arguing that.

"After everything, I used to not be able to sleep without Sasha holding my hand, it felt like I had someone keeping watch," Mason exclaimed softly, his eyebrows furrowing slightly in confusion as if he hadn't expected himself to speak about something so intimate.

"I'm sorry... For whatever it was that Jonathan did to you," Tommy spoke, and to his surprise, Mason gave away nothing to whether or not his words had struck a chord or not. It was silent for a few moments, those seconds dragging on as they looked at each other, both gauging what the other wanted.

"You aren't responsible for what you're brother did, don't apologize," Mason said tentatively, and Tommy realized that this was him admitting to it, that Jonathan not only had his father killed but that he was apart of it, that Mason really did understand who his brother was and what he was capable of.

"Still feels like I should..."

Mason sighed and shook his head, a gesture that from anyone else would look as though it was out of disappointment, but on Mason, it just seemed like acceptance, like he wasn't going to argue it. Tommy curled up more into himself, tucking his chin against his collarbones and pressing his lips to his knees, returning his eyes to the seashore. He was still trying to figure out when things shifted between them. Maybe last night? When Mason held onto him when he couldn't find himself in his panic. Perhaps it was before that, the small things, the understanding that showed in his eyes every time he looked at Tommy since the first moment they met.

He didn't realize he was beginning to lean into Mason's side until he adjusted his arm behind Tommy, his fingers digging into the dirt. His arm was like one of the dock house's support beams - strong and sturdy, prepared to hold him up if he was to fall backwards. Tommy's eyelids grew heavy, his body sore and his eye beginning to throb.

"Do you need to go back? I'll tell them to leave," Mason asked softly, his lips near Tommy's ear.

"I just want to stay here for a bit," Tommy's words were muffled against his knees, and he let his eyes close, let the smell of saltwater fill his senses, let the crashing of waves take him away.

"Okay."

~

"Mom! Mom, you're home!" Tommy laughed, running past his brother, who was waiting patiently at the top of the porch stairs to greet their parents. Tommy didn't care, he hadn't seen his Mom in a whole week! Jonathan gave an annoyed grunt when he was thrown off balance by his younger brother but stayed where he was at the top of the stairs with his hands crossed behind his back.

"My beautiful boy! Oh, how I have missed you!" his mother dropped her bags the instant she saw the little blond-headed typhoon head straight for her, her hands freeing up just in time to catch him as he leapt into her embrace.

They laughed together as she spun his around, his head burying against her shoulder. She smelt like her oil paints and the flowers in her garden, and she was as warm as the sun on a summer day, and her laugh was like honey. He wanted to stay with her forever, and he wished she didn't have to leave for a week every month for her gallery opening. That week she was gone, was the longest week of his life, and he didn't think he would be able to get through it if it wasn't for Uncle Christian who came to pick him up from school every day, who would take him to the shop and teach him about engines until dinner.

"You must tell me everything that you learnt at school, and what Uncle Christian has taught you at the shop, I want to hear all about it," She said into his curly hair, and as she pulled away to look at him, his whole world fell apart because every good memory he had of her was now tainted in blood.

She stuttered, a tear sliding down her blood-splattered cheek, blood blossomed like a rose in spring on her white blouse. "Tommy," She whispered, hand extended out, fingers trembling, as she fell, the two of them suddenly alone back in that kitchen, the smell of gun powder clinging to the air around them. He watched in horror as she fell to her knees in front of him and he hardly flinched as Joesph, the man who had just shot his mother, turned the gun on himself... Painting the whole kitchen red.

Tommy could do nothing except lay down next to her, taking her hand as she struggled to breathe through the blood in her throat, the blood seeped across the marble floor, engulfing his body as the warmth of sunshine oozed out of her. Her eyes glazed over, unfocused but staring aimlessly at him, she struggled to say something, her words splattering blood against his face and he grabbed her hand, convinced he'd never let her go, even as her eyes darkened. "Mom...? Mommy, please, don't go to sleep, don't go..." 

Tommy woke to soft voices and a heavyweight of something around his shoulders. He was about to be sparked into a panic when he felt a familiar hand behind his neck, he could smell the saltwater, could hear the waves crashing on the shore and he knew he was in Winchester. Where he lived in New York was nowhere near the beach, that kitchen was nowhere near the beach. He didn't know how long he had been asleep for and he didn't know if he was prepared to open his eyes yet, but the pain shocked him out of it, it was in his ribs and his face, it was in the carving on his hip.

He could only see out of his good eye, the other one must've been swollen shut at this stage, but he was still where he was when he came out here with Mason, except now he had a blanket around him, and Sasha, Nicky, and Harry were out here too. Tommy also realized that he had his head leaning against Mason's shoulder. He must've felt Tommy flinch as he usually did when he woke up and moved his hand to the back of his neck where it still rested.

"Oh, sleeping beauty is finally awake," Nicky grinned from next to Mason.

"I just want to say that you two make a beautiful couple," Harry continued the teasing and Tommy jolted up from Mason's shoulder, instantly regretting it when the pain struck his ribs like a steel pipe swinging hard into his gut. Tommy was even more surprised that Mason did not react at all to that, then again, he guessed it wasn't all that shocking, Mason didn't react to even the most surprising of things.

"Here, it looks painful," Sasha smiles her soft smile as she held out a bottle of water and a couple of painkillers in the palm of her hand. Tommy accepted it without question, though his trembling hands didn't go unnoticed as all of their eyes trailed them as he reached for the pills and water.

"Bad dream?" Nicky asked, his grin instantly dissolved into something a little more serious and concern-fulled.

"Where's Christian?" Tommy asked, avoiding the question as he dropped the pills against his tongue. He could still feel his mothers dried and tacky blood sticking to his skin, he felt as though he needed a nice long shower, or to swim in the crashing waves.

"He went to the shop, thought it was best to give you some time to calm down a little bit," Nicky answered cautiously as if expecting him to lash out at his words.

"I'm sorry you had to hear all of that, I'm a stranger, and he's like family to you, must've been uncomfortable hearing me tear into him the way I did," Tommy exclaimed, fiddling anxiously with the bottle cap. They all watched him with steady gazes, but he could see the stress behind their eyes, the way they looked at him as if they weren't angry nor welcoming of the way he treated Christian.

"You were harsh, but it was justified..." Harry murmured and it was probably the most conflicted expression Tommy had ever seen on his face, especially when he always seemed to be the most carefree one of the siblings.

"I shouldn't have been that harsh. Sometimes I get confused and don't know where I am or what is really happening, and the next day I'm usually really exhausted and angry and I took it out on him. It's not an excuse I just don't want you to think I have always been like this," Tommy tried to explain it the best be could, but he still didn't think it made much sense.

"Dammit, Tommy, I mean, since day one you have been stubborn and shoot death glares every time one of us teases you. But I think I can speak for all of us when I say that we never thought you weren't justified in your anger," Nicky said, leaning around Mason and ruffling up Tommy's hair and he couldn't stop his lips tugging at the corners slightly with relief.

"Thanks," Tommy mumbled, rubbing his smile off on the sleeve of his shirt.

"Oh my god, I can't deal with you! Jesus, you really are like a lost puppy, let yourself smile for once!" Harry groaned as if it was the most dramatic thing in the world.

"I do smile!" Tommy protested, and they all chuckled at that, reacting as if he was some little kid trying to prove himself to them.

"Yes, Tommy, you do, but only maliciously or sarcastically," Nicky pointed out.

"Actually, that's incorrect, when we had our little beach date last week he was grinning from ear to ear," Sasha defended him, and Tommy held his hand out in her direction in an exaggerated "point made" motion.

"That's because you fed him alcohol that you stole from the diner, that doesn't count," Mason interjected.

"You still have to pay that back, moms gonna kill you otherwise," Harry jostles his eyebrows at her which earns him a smack in the arm. Tommy did as they said and let himself smile as their teasing continued, the bickering that made him feel that same warmth of sunshine that he hadn't felt since he was with his mother.

"Oh, it's so cute! Keep doing it!" Harry quacked excitedly, pinching Tommy's cheeks as some elderly woman would.

"Ow! Did you forget I was punched several times!" Tommy gasped, smacking Harry's hands away and despite the pain, his smile didn't fade.

"Sorry, sorry," Harry held up his hands in surrender as he backed away to his position, his eyes momentarily flicking to Mason, a dubious smile on his face. Tommy didn't look up at Mason at his side, but could just imagine the death glare Harry was getting from him, and he felt his cheeks warm.

"You really are stupid, you know that!" Nicky laughed, slinging his arm around Harry who had retreated all the way round to his side, the furthest he could get from Mason.

"So are you coming around for Sunday dinner tomorrow? Please come, you've said no twice already," Sasha begged, batting her eyelashes seductively even though she knew Tommy was gay, though it did cause Nicky to choke on the water he was drinking. Tommy's smirk grew at that, it was so apparent that Nicky was blatantly in love with Sasha but was too shy to do anything about it.

"If you don't, mom will come and drag you out of the house, and trust me when I say that she is a lot scarier than Mason," Sasha matched Tommy's smirk as her eyes trailed over to Mason.

"Okay, I'll come," Tommy gave in, even if the idea of seeing a mother in the kitchen again made his stomach churn uncomfortably, but he thought that it might be okay this time.