Chapter 16;After
960 Words
It was over a week since the incident.And since then I’ve skipped school.
My phone had over 33 missed calls from Mom. 20 from David.Maybe a hundred from my school.
I didn’t answer any of them.
The shower ran for ten minutes. I didn’t get in. I just listened to the water.
I heard footsteps downstairs,David wasn’t still back from his business trip so I wondered who it could be.Probably Xavier…
Not him.Mom came in.
She stopped in the doorway of my room. Keys in her hand. Hospital badge still clipped to her shirt.
She looked at the bed. The blanket. The chair.
Then she looked at me.
I didn’t look back. My eyes were on the floor. On the fresh bandage under my sock.
She didn’t ask why I skipped school.
She set her bag down. Walked to the kitchen. Opened the fridge. Closed it.
“I took Tuesday off,” she said to the counter.
I nodded. Once.I didn’t care cause she never did but only pretended to do so.All she cared about was Lucas my stepdad.
She turned around.
“Can you go to school today.”
I shook my head.
“Okay.”
She didn’t move closer.
She went to the living room. Sat on the couch. The TV didn’t go on.
At 9:10AM her phone rang. She answered in the other room. Her voice was low.
“Yeah. She was alone. No, she’s not talking. Not since the storm. I need a referral. Today if possible.”
Silence.
“Nonverbal. After a panic episode. Yes. I’ll bring her in.”
She hung up.
“Appointment at 3,” she said from the hallway. “Dr. Hale. She’s good with kids. With… this.”
I pulled my knees up on the bed. The hoodie Xavier left was still on me. It smelled like rain and something clean.
Mom came in and set a paper on the nightstand. Intake forms. A pen.
She didn’t push it toward me.
She sat on the edge of the bed. Far end.
“I’m sorry I wasn’t here,” she said.
I didn’t answer.
She stayed for a minute. Then she stood up.
“I’m making eggs.”
The sound of a pan started in the kitchen.
By noon we were already on the road to see the therapist.
The car was warm. Mom drove with both hands on the wheel. She didn’t turn on the radio.
Dr. Hale’s office was small. Plants in the corner. Two chairs. No desk between us.
Dr. Hale was older. Cardigan. She didn’t smile too big.
She set a clipboard down. Didn’t open it.
“Stacy,” she said.
I looked at my hands.
“It’s okay not to talk,” she said. “We can just sit.”
She slid a box of tissues to the middle of the table. Then she slid a notebook. And a pen.
I didn’t touch them.
For 45 minutes we didn’t do much. She asked three questions. I shook my head to all of them.
Before we left she handed Mom a card.
“Give her time,” she said. “And give her choices. Even small ones. What to eat. What to wear. It helps.”
In the car Mom asked, “Soup or eggs.”
I wasn’t in the mood for food.
By Thursday,I didn’t go to school.
I stayed in my room. The chair from my desk was in the corner now. Not by the bed.
I moved it. Back next to the bed. Then back to the corner.
There was a knock. Soft.
Him.
He didn’t come in. He stood in the hallway with a plastic bag.
Mom opened the door wider.
He handed her the bag. “David told me to check up on her.
Xavier looked past Mom. Saw me on the bed.
He looked concerned.
I couldn’t return the look.
He didn’t say anything. He turned and left.
That night I tried to sleep without the flashlight under my pillow. I lasted an hour. Then I got it
out.
By Monday,I wore the gray hoodie under my uniform. Mom drove me there which was surprisingly weird.
The parking lot was loud. People yelling. Cars honking.
My chest got tight.
Mom parked. Turned the car off.
“You don’t have to talk to anyone,” she said. “You can go to the nurse. I told them.”
I opened the door.
The hallway smelled like bleach and old pizza. Lockers slammed.
I kept my eyes down.
At my locker, someone said my name.
I didn’t answer.
I got my books. Closed it.
Liv wasn’t in school.she had called saying she wanted to stay at home with her baby brother who was sick.
In first period, Ms. Carter took attendance.
“Stacy?”
I raised my hand.
She paused. Looked at me. Then moved on.
At lunch I sat at the end of a table. By the wall. I ate the crackers from My bag.
Alone.Again.
After school Mom was still waiting.This time she came with company.
Lucas.
“Stacy”.He said.”it’s been long since I last saw you.”Why don’t you stop by and let’s catch up?”
I looked at him.That fake smile which he always had.I remembered the first time he showed up.Loads of chocolate probably to appease me.But in less than a year after dad’s death,he married mom and made her move out.
I turned to leave.
“Dr. Hale again tomorrow,”mom said loudly for everyone to hear.
I nodded.Embarrassed.Now everyone knew I was unstable.
Trust me I can’t wait to be done with high school so I could move out of this damn town.
Away from mom,Lucas,David,and most especially “Him
- Writer
