For Starting Over

A new space

I drove into campus still feeling a strange bubbly happiness that my wolf had re-emerged and seemed to be okay, the nervous edges of my emotions only just starting to creep into my thoughts.

I wasn’t supposed to be going to college alone. He was supposed to be here, too. We had agreed on Wolverton, living in dorms for a year and then moving in together. We had discussed classes and extra activities. We were supposed to be doing this together. I never, ever wanted to do this adventure on my own… but here I was… driving through the last few miles of trees towards the campus we had dreamed of attending together.

The buildings were all made to look like they were wooden, logs or rustic… even though they were cement and brick. Everything had a magical, woodland empire feel… I chuckled, to make sure we wolves felt at home no doubt. Up the long snaking parkway that led out of the trees, flags of every country and every wolf pack were hung from the lampposts. The bright colors waving proudly against the blue sky and dark evergreen trees. It felt majestic.

Little signs were posted giving directions… student lounge, male gym, female gym, health center, freshman orientation, etc. I followed the signs that said “First Year Registration,” parking along the roadway and joining the queue. Everyone was buzzing with excitement. I watched nervously as some of the new students were trying to make eye contact with as many other students as possible. “Mating Degrees,” mom had called them, just going to college to find their mate and then drop out. I smirked and tried to keep my eyes averted, I wanted to at least sign in before I dropped out.

- Name?

The girl behind the table asked, her wildly curly hair in an impressive shade of red covering her face and most of her torso; she glanced an impressive stack of papers at me.

-Aster. Natalie Aster. Black Rock Pack.

I said with a slight tremble. She looked up, bright green eyes flashing and a pink stain spreading under her freckled face.

-I’m Cass Johnson, I’m from Black Rock, too. I don’t think I know you though…

-Its a big pack, I guess. It’s nice to meet you, Cass. Where do I go from here?

I shrugged and smiled, motioned to the people looking like ants on an anthill.

“Well, everything is numbered… so I’m female table #1, I’ll give you papers, then you’ll go over to female #2… avoid the blue numbers, the males are all jumpy and acting foolish with so many new females to sniff.

Cass quipped with a smile and a humorous eye roll. I took the packet of papers and smiled. Maybe I could do college on my own if there were more Cass Johnsons here.

The rest of the morning flew by… Id photos, keys, class time tables, financial papers, housing papers, meal plan papers, wolf rule papers (no phasing in lecture halls, no phasing in the dorms, no mating in public spaces, etc), by the time lunch came I felt dizzy with the amount of information.

-Aster!

I heard a somewhat familiar voice call. It was Cass with a few friends, all gorgeous and tall with striking faces and that laid back sexiness of confidence, they motioned me over to their lunch spot.

-Aster, these are the girls… girls, meet Aster… she’s from my part of the world.

-Natalie, Natalie Aster.

I said with a smile shaking each of their hands before plopping down with my bagged lunch.

-Here they come…

One of the girls, Ingrid with the waist length black hair and blazing blue eyes, said with a mock warning tone. Before I could ask who was coming, four enormous guys joined our group… each one covered in muscles and sweat, their T-shirt’s stretched across pecs, their baggy cotton gym shorts hanging off their narrow hips. I watched in amusement as each guy grabbed up a girl from the group…

Ingrid’s mate sinking to sit behind her and grabbing her back against his chest before burying his face in her hair.

Cass’ mate practically tackled her into the ground in playful roughness, pinning her arms and legs before kissing her. After the quick kiss they sat side by side, arms and legs tangled together.

Ciara’s mate pulled her to her feet and kissed her thoroughly before they sat snuggled together, his lips never leaving her face and neck.

Mariahs mate was the most reserved of the group, sitting next to her and kissing her forehead, breathing in her smell softly and tenderly. He ran his hands up and down her arms, but did not demonstrate the same playful possessiveness of his friends.

-Fellas, meet our new friend… Natalie Aster.

Cass said, untangling herself for only a moment to motion to me and give me a saucy wink. The boys all greeted me politely before turning their attention back to the girls and the lunch offerings. I felt a twinge of tears and a sudden panicky fear that I was intruding and that I ought to take my broken heart somewhere and cry alone. I pushed it down, choked a bite of my sandwich into my stomach and tried to calm myself down enough to eat. We were wolves, mating was part of our entire culture and way of life. I was going to have to learn to face couples and mates without losing my mind.

-So you’re from Black Rock?

Mariahs mate said, his eyes nearly completely black. I noticed the other boys eyes were also darkened from the lust they were tightly controlling, it was frightening almost to see such a powerful pulling force under restraint.

-Yes, with my mom. My father was from Red River, though… I didn’t know him, he died when I was little.

I added the last part lamely, unsure why I mentioned him at all. I rarely even acknowledged him as part of me or my life at all.

-I’m Red River on my moms side! We might be related! How cool would that be?!

Ingrid exclaimed excitedly.

-Very cool.

I agreed with a smile, still breathing through my nose to keep composed.

- What’s your major?

Mariah asked, peeking from under her brown fringe bangs. She had beautiful hazel eyes with the longest black eyelashes I’d ever seen.

-Officially I’m undecided, but I think I’m going to do International Relations.

The older wolves all nodded thoughtfully. They were all majoring in either business, accounting, IT security, or physical therapy. I nodded and tried to look mature.

- So you’re in Dorm 1… “Aster,” so you’re with A’s through H’s. We can help you carry your stuff if you want, we are supposed to be helping Freshman before and after Training.

Cass’ mate offered with a smile before grabbing Cass for a tickle and a squeeze. I accepted and our group took off to find my Civic and Dorm 1.

I could feel my wolf looking around with interest, trying to take in all the smells and sights of our new world. I found myself looking into the face of each male we passed by, a strange urge to know if my future was already sharing a sidewalk with me. Not yet. I squeezed my arms around my middle, trying to trap this new sensation inside me and not lose it…

Hope.