The Enforcer or The Mafia Prince

Chapter 47

On the drive back to the condo, Jessica stared out the window. It had been a good one, but the amount of information she'd processed over the last two days left Jess exhausted. Tristan had shown her a part of himself she didn't realize was there. He was neither a playboy nor a lazy man-child. Jessica didn't know what he was but knew there was more to Tristan than he let on.

"This is why I shouldn't try to label people," Jessica thought. She recalled a quote from Elie Wiesel in a book she read once. People were far more complex than a label. It was unfair of Jessica to try to do so. After all, labeling her wasn't easy either. There were many that applied to her, but none were perfect. Labels also prevent one from experiencing growth. If Tristan were only a playboy that liked to show off his family's money, who would he become at thirty or forty?

"Are you okay?"

"Hmm?" Jessica responded, her eyes locked on the passing scenery.

"Jess?"

"What?" She turned to look at Tristan. He glanced back and forth between her and the road.

"Are you okay? You haven't said anything since we got in the car?"

"I'm good. I was just thinking."

"What about?"

Jess ran her palms again her thighs. She felt the rough corduroy under her hands as she smoothed out her dress. How could she explain?

"I think I owe you an apology."

"Why?" Tristan kept his eyes on the road, but Jess saw the confusion on his face.

"I don't know how to explain."

If Jess put her thoughts into words, they would not capture the complexity of her meaning. Saying she'd thought too little of him would sound much harsher than she meant. How to put words to her thoughts? Jessica bit her lip.

"I'll try to explain, but know I don't mean anything in a harmful way," Jessica cautioned Tristan. "When we first met, I thought you were frivolous. I thought you were trying to be someone you're not. I know how we met and how you acted prejudiced me against you, but I still think it's unfair of me." Tristan c****d his head to the left as he listened to Jessica. He didn't speak and let her keep talking.

"I don't know how to say what I mean. In simple terms, I've underestimated you. I tried to label you by the person you pretended to be even though I've known that was a front. I already knew you weren't who you seemed to be, but I forgot to look further than that."

The more she spoke, the more Jessica squirmed in her seat. Each word followed the next faster and faster. With a groan, Jess told Tristan to forget it. She slumped back into her seat, defeated by her own inability to articulate her thoughts.

"Jess," Tristan said. "You've done nothing wrong. I appreciate you trying to get to know me more. But you're overlooking the process of getting to know someone."

"What do you mean?"

"You feel bad because you're getting to know parts of me that don't match who you think I am, right? But that's part of meeting someone. No one is wholly who you think they are from day one. You expect to jump from day one to years of knowing someone in weeks."

Jessica huffed, frustrated. "I don't understand."

"Jess, how long did it take for you to know Andrea?"

"Well, we met a few years ago..." Jessica trailed off, not understanding what Tristan meant.

"Yes, but how long did it take for you to feel like you knew her? Do you know everything about her now?"

"I don't know. I think so?"

Jessica thought about her friendship with Andrea. The girls got along from day one. They never had that awkward period where they spent time getting to know one another. It was like they already did. Was that why she didn't have many friends?

"Do you really know everything about her?"

"I don't know."

"What about your other friends?"

"I don't really have other friends."

"What do you mean? You're active on campus and friendly. You must have plenty of friends."

"I don't. I have Andrea. I've only met Emma and Gia recently. I get along with the people I know in class or from volunteer events, but I wouldn't consider them friends."

"Why not?"

"I don't know them."

"Have you tried to get to know them?"

"Um..." Jessica trailed off. She started to understand what Tristan meant.

"What about your friends from high school?"

"I don't have any."

"What do you mean?"

"When my mom got diagnosed with cancer, my friends stopped being friends with me."

"What?" Tristan looked at Jess. He couldn't believe that was the case. "Why would they stop being friends with you because of that?"

"Well, I didn't have the money to go out anymore. They couldn't come over because Mom was sick... they said I wasn't fun to be around anymore."

Jessica didn't explain further, but Tristan understood. He'd had similar experiences when his mom died. The difference was that he'd been younger when that happened. It was easier to make friends at that age because that's what kids do. For Jessica, she was isolated by the time she graduated. Not on bad terms with anyone, but not close enough with anyone to feel it was an important relationship. Tristan's heart ached for her. She seemed lonely.

"Jess, what I'm trying to say is that you're skipping the middle part. You meet someone. You get to know them. You establish a relationship with them. By relationship, I mean any kind of friendship or whatever. You're skipping the 'get to know them' part.' No one is exactly who you think they are on day one."

Jess placed a hand to her mouth as she thought about what Tristan said. He was right. Andrea was like a kindred spirit, and getting to know her was like getting to know herself. Everyone else, though. It was hard to feel connected to them.

"Does that mean I'm a bad friend," Jessica worried aloud.

"No, I don't think you're a bad friend. I think you're bad at making friends. You want to rush building relationships with people, but that's the fun part."

"I..." Jess was at a loss for words. "I think you're right."

Tristan smiled at Jessica. He took her hand while keeping the other on the steering wheel.

"Don't worry," he said, "you haven't done anything wrong. You can practice. As for getting to know me, I need to apologize to you, too. I didn't want to get to know you because I thought you'd be a distraction from what I'm working on."

"What you're working on, what?" Jessica heard Tristan sigh.

"I planned to show you when we get back to the condo, but I guess I can start explaining now."

Jessica griped Tristan's hand, anxious to hear what he had to say.

"You had every right to get mad at me before. You were right. I knew I had to meet you and didn't take you seriously. I didn't want to. I've been working on something for a long time. No one, not Ms. Martha, not Declan, and especially my father, knows what I'm trying to do. When we met, I didn't want you to pay attention to me. I was afraid you'd get in the way of things."

"Jessica, I'm going to tell you something that I've never told anyone. You have to keep it a secret, or bad things will happen. Can you promise me that?"

Jessica jumped up in her seat and nodded her head. She was terrible at lying, but if no one else knew what was going on, it wouldn't be a problem.

"I've been gathering information about my family for a long time. I want my dad to go to jail for the things he's done."

"But," Jessica stuttered, "what about everyone else?"

"I know. I've been working for years to find evidence against him without hurting anyone else. I want to take over the family and pull us out of the dark. I want everything we do, to be honest and legal. Even though Dad takes care of everyone working for us, he's still putting them in jeopardy. If someone gets caught doing something for us, they could lose everything. Yeah, we give them legal aid, but it's not enough. You know how many people forget we're the mob, but we are. We... I've hurt people, Jess. The things I've done at my father's instruction..."

"I don't want us to be like that anymore. I don't want to be like that. The day we ran into Sophia and found the camera in my apartment, I felt terrified. I was afraid someone had hacked my computer and found my work. That's why I asked you to do something on my phone."

"What did I do?"

"I had you start a security scan to make sure there were no viruses or data stolen. Someone had tried, but no one got into my secure files, so I was able to kick them out."