EMPTY SOULS

IS IT THE END?

some dreams we wish could come true, some dreams for which we pray day and night and some dreams for which we not just pray but, also work for it, because, we cannot see ourselves in a situation where these dreams just remain dreams forever and you regret for not trying your level best! And love is also a dream come true but, which type is it? 1/2/3? Life will surely let us know that one day!

‘I was totally into the story, the book which I found in the library was the real meaning of romantic. I couldn't stop blushing and couldn't stop reading too. Suddenly a lock of my hair fell on my face, I wasn't bothered about it at all. All I wanted to do was to complete the book and leave the library as soon as possible but, I felt someone placing my lock of hair behind my right ear lobe with their extremely soft fingers. Before I completed the story I looked up to thank her for the concern and my eyes remained wide open...it was ‘him’ not ‘her’. A-l-e-e-e-e-m!!. Aleem standing right in front of me. Aleem!!!! He was right in front of me, showcasing his slightly fake but, slightly real and totally formal smile unlike me. Seriously, why is he here,placing my lock of hair behind my ear lobe? Wait...where's my hijabb???’

A whole silly dream it was. I laughed out loud. It was hard to recover but, what seemed weird was his smile which keeps on repeating, in my mind then, and in my dreams now. It's been 6 days since he smiled at me, a smile which meant nothing to him but, meant more than something to me, that was all I could figure out within a week. Genius! I know. Lmao. 

I was happy all my way to the college. Unreasonably, yes. Because that's the best sort of happiness according to William Ralph Inge. An ideal mind is a devil’s workshop. But, a devil’s workshop isn't an ideal mind. I know not funny at all. Because, these days I have been thinking about something I shouldn't actually think of. Love would be the biggest word I could use but, there's this saying “ Love is Halal”. Which also means maybe, crushing on someone is halal. Or maybe not. Huh?? I'm so messy. But, I'm not ideal. I have million things to do. Yet, my mind is a devil's workshop. Slightly confusing though! 

After reaching the college, I met my girl gang. These precious gems always change my mood and add me into a whole damn new world of our’s. Friendship is obviously greater than love and crushes too. I repeat and agree, it totally is. As for now it is. XD

I wanted to see Aleem. But, I wanted my ego to not leave my way. So, I carried it with myself and moved ahead to the 1st floor of our college. I wished I barged into him again. But, sadly, leap year comes only once in fuckin 4 long years. Hope you got that one..hehehhe. After I reached the senior classrooms, I started to plan something which would atleast let me have a formal conversation with him. And hell yeah, this devil's workshop of mine has so many creative ideas in it. My mind came up with one big brand idiotic idea and handed it over to my lips. My heart was already being handed over to someone whom I barely knew so,he decided to stay out of it. My hands and legs followed my mind's command then. Here, I stood in front of Aleem’s classroom. Scared soul, but with a confident body language . 

“Hey. Alee…!”

I couldn't even complete the sentence because of his investigative look. 

“Why are you here?”he asked rudely again. Naaahhh!

“ You are never gonna change!” I murmured to myself.

“What?” He asked confusingly.

“Nothing. Just wanted a favour.” I lied. 

“Again!! What now?” he annoyingly asked.

“Fine. I'm really sorry for disturbing you. I thought we were something near to friends, even though I barely know you. If you really are so annoyed. Carry on. I won't disturb you again. Never will I.” I let everything out. But, that wasn't true totally. Partly true maybe. 

I thought we were more than friends, I thought I could start something special. I thought he was a guy, whose soft from within. I thought, I'm different enough, real enough, true enough and not annoying in any way. But, that was all wrong. This was the truth now, which i just faced and immediately, I left his classroom.

When I reached my class, I observed that i shed some tears my way and my skin seemed wet. I didn't want to reveal this in any way so, after quietly washing my face in the washroom I returned back to my class. I always have been asked to 'move on' whenever things seem impossible and hurt you more than you can bear. That's a very big emotion though. I decided the end of my tale. This was it. An end before a start of wajiha’s tale. Nor will anyone read it, because the heroine just assumed some bullshit and then comes a dreadful end. Tanaaaan. 

Maybe, Allah (SWT) wanted to teach me a lesson. Yes, maybe. Aleem is known as the chocolate boy of our college. Going behind him is a waste. It doesn't affect him too. It's quite normal to him to be rude always. I console myself by putting these thoughts in my mind. Doesn't my story sound stupid to you? Like, I just spoke to a random guy whom i hated, and now, it's all a beautiful feeling and then, I again decide to end, because I declare he's rude now but, was sweet before. CUT IT. I'm deleting him. DELETE. 

 But, what next?