The Dragon Princess

The Secret Spot

Ella,

I am sorry for yesterday. You know that I don’t want things to be like this, that I want so much more for us. I fear that sometimes, I allow my desperation to see you, to touch you, overcome my common sense. For that, I guess I am sorry, but I would do anything to be with you, Ella. Even if it’s only for a moment. In that sense, I don’t regret it.

Your sweet smell, your soft skin, your hypnotic eyes, I cannot and will not ever get enough of you, Ella. Please, forgive me for my ungentlemanly behaviour. Give me another chance. My heart is forever yours. Please, meet me at our secret spot tonight. I’ll be waiting.

Eternally,

Caspian.

I fold the parchment and hold it against my chest. My heart aches upon reading his words, knowing that he wants me as much as I want him. But will this ever be enough? Can I live my life in secret, be the lover that nobody should ever know about? I don’t think so. But right now, Caspian is the only good thing I have, the best thing I have. The one thing that makes me feel alive. Even if we don’t last forever, can’t I enjoy it just for now?

I wait in my bedroom, listening for the tell-tale signs that the others have gone to bed. Many nights I have crept from the Manor to see Caspian. It’s against the rules, of course, on more than one level. Nobody is to leave the Manor after nightfall unless it is absolutely necessary. A lady, those of noble rank at least, shall not be left unaccompanied. And a nobleman shall not woo a commoner. Most of the Kingdom’s rules don’t make sense to me, so I have no problem breaking a few if it means I can see Caspian.

Leaving my bedroom, I tip toe through the halls, checking and double checking that nobody is still awake. There’s something quite eerie about the Manor at night. Only a few candles remain aglow in the hallways, lighting a path for the servants. The wind outside causes the windows to howl and shake, a monster just waiting to break inside.

Outside, it’s even scarier. In the dead of night, it’s hard to see the shadows that zoom above. A grumble, a growl, the flapping of giant wings. They’re the only signs that a dragon is close by, and there’s no way to know if it’s the kind of dragon you’d want to cross paths with. Luckily, all seems quiet tonight and it doesn’t take me long to reach our secret spot. A few hundred yards from the Manor, a small stream flows towards the oceans. An oasis amid the dry desert lands of Graka, my favourite place.

I can see Caspian laying on the sand, his elbows supporting him as he looks up to the stars. Even in the dark he is strikingly handsome. The moon casts a glow on his chestnut hair, his tan skin smooth and flawless. I watch him for a while, ignoring the butterflies in my stomach that urge me to get closer.

“Hey,” I whisper, sitting down next to him.

“You came, I was worried that you wouldn’t.”

“Here I am.”

“Ella, I...”

“Stop, Caspian. You don’t need to apologise again. I know how things work; I know that I will never be more to you than a secret lover. Does it hurt me? Yes. But what can I do? My life has no meaning, no excitement. Apart from you. So, even though I know this will end, I’m going to enjoy it...for now.”

“I don’t want it to end, Ella. Ever. I want you and nobody else.” His hand reaches up to caress my cheek. I melt into his touch.

Tears well in my eyes, because I know that no matter how much we both want this, it will never last. Why is life so cruel in ways? Shouldn’t love trump all else?

“Why are you crying, my sweet Ella?”

“Because...because it hurts to want something so badly and know that you can never have it.”

I don’t want to think about this right now, there’s no point. The sorrow in Caspian’s eyes makes it hard to breathe. I wipe my tears away and straddle him, distracting us both.

“Let’s not worry now, let us enjoy the night, the few moments we have together.”

I lower my face to his, brushing my lips softly against his. His hands grip my waist, and it’s enough to send a shock through my body. The cold of the night no longer exists, the heat between our bodies enough to keep us warm. In an instant, we become lost in each other. Our hands work rapidly to remove our clothing, scattering the garments wherever they land.

These moments, this passion...it’s what I live for. Caspian flips me over so he is now on top of me, my legs still wrapped around his waist. He gazes down at me, his hand reaching for my hair, twirling it between his fingers as he always does.

“You’re so beautiful, Ella. The most beautiful woman in all of Graka. I love you. You know that, right?”

“I know, Caspian. I love you too. Now, make love to me.”

Our bodies writhe together in a silent dance of love and passion. In these moments, we can get lost in each other, forgetting everything else. I never want it to end, but it always does. And once it does, the reality of our situation comes crashing down on me, washing away the carefree high that just was.

We’re both silent as we gather our clothing and get dressed. An uncomfortable silence, neither of us knowing what to say or do. Not knowing when we will see each other again.

“Cecilia is throwing me a party.” I speak.

“Really? That’s nice of her, it is a special birthday for a special girl.”

“I suppose. I’ve no idea who will come though, it’s not like I have any friends...”

“I shall come then.”

“Will you?” My heart skips a beat.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world, Ella. I already know what gift I will get you.”

“I don’t need a gift, Caspian. And besides, won’t people talk if you bought a commoner like me something nice?”

“So what if they do? I’m tired of this, Ella. I no longer want to hide how I feel. Why should I? Why should we have to hide? We’re not doing anything wrong. We love each other, that’s all.”

“But, Caspian, your family. They...”

“It doesn’t matter, Ella. Soon, the whole Kingdom will know that I love you.”

I open my mouth to argue back, remind him that if he does that, he will most likely be disowned, left on the streets to fend for himself, but he stops me with a kiss. A kiss so ferocious that it leaves me breathless, unable to question anything. My birthday might just be an event to remember...if Caspian has anything to do with it.