becoming a unicorn

day 7

My first week away from him was a whirlwind of experiences I hadn't been allowed to have in so long I almost forgot that I enjoyed things.....like picnicking by myself with a good book. I got food stamps today so I guess I did something this week...I couldn't get a job... they kept saying that I don't have enough experience; but, how am I supposed to tell them the truth about why?

I felt kind of uneasy when I went to the library and filled out more job applications after lunch. like I was being watched, I kept looking around for someone who might be looking at me but I didn't see anyone.....the feeling persisted until I made it back to the shelter.....and then it felt like someone was staring at me through the hole in the fence. I've been waiting for him to jump out of the bushes for so long that it must be making me paranoid.

I am safe here they promised.....I am safe..... there's nothing to worry about it has to all be in my head.........I'm safe.....I have to be.....he doesn't know where I'm at, no one does.......

I have another interview tomorrow.....big box store hopefully my lack of experience won't matter. I have to get to bed early because the bus is a two hour trip and a ten minute walk. I told them I would take any job even taking out trash and mopping up vomit I don't care, not only do I need this job to take care of myself but I NEED THIS for me..... because I have to be able to do all the things he always said I wasn't capable of....I just know I am