ELENA
My alarm went off at five-thirty and I was already awake.
I lay in the guest room and looked at the ceiling and went through the conversation the same way I went through difficult client cases. Statement by statement. What had been said and what it meant and what I had done about it.
I had kissed him.
I had walked across the kitchen and kissed him in the middle of an argument because he had said I don't want them near you and it had come out of him like something he hadn't planned to say, and I had looked at his face and stopped thinking.
That was the problem. I had stopped thinking.
I got up. Had a shower. Made a list. Three client sessions, two calls, the Beaumont programming brief. A full, structured, professional day.
This was manageable.
I walked into the kitchen at six-
