BLAMELESS SORROWS

60. Crying.

Axel's Point of View.

It has been about half an hour since Uncle Jo and I have been sitting by the common room, a bit jittery and very anxious.

You see the talk that grandpa did with me alone, it seems he is doing the same with Tilbe too. And that is today.

And I finally knew why Tilbe was so very curious the other day, cause damn Iam as well.

Uncle Jo also seems to be quite a nerve reck.

Axel: Unexpectedly this secrecy do make you very curious for some unknown reason right?

He glare at me as I said that while I raise my hand in complete surrender with not really knowing why.

Uncle Jo: Iam going through this for the second time, and if that grandpa don't do this same thing with me. Then Iam really going to be so so mad about it.

I chuckled at his reasoning. He must have been quite curious.

Axel: But I wonder why grandpa is doing this?

He also nod looking a bit puzzled and troubled.

Uncle Jo: This make me uneasy for some reason. And not knowing why he talk about make evrything so much more anxious. So on that note, is it really not okay for you to tell me what grandpa said to you?

I look at him speechless while he look at me as if we are talking about very very serious matter.

And its not like I don't want to share or that I must keep something a secret or anything like such. It's just that I have nothing to share. Grandpa talk mostly about what I should do and what will make me happy and what might not.

And there was nothing in it that I can share with Uncle Jo or anyone else, it just seems a bit private. Thats why I didn't said anything, the same with grandpa.

Axel: I have nothing to share actually.

He huffed just like Tilbe always does, but of course not as cute.

Axel: You know Tilbe can pull that off because she is just naturally cute right?

Uncle Jo: My boy, are you actually trying to piss me off for just no reason now?

I shake my head in a no, trying to hide my laughter. Uncle Jo do look comical in such a situation.

Just as we were discussing that, Tilbe and Grandpa come out of the room they have been for about an hour by now.

Grandpa is walking at front while Tilbe follow him like a lost puppy, almost looking sad or very sad.

Grandpa: Jo shall we leave now?

Uncle Jo nod and stood up and pass the cane to grandpa. It is his walking stick.

Grandpa look back at Tilbe and softly pat her head.

Grandpa: Grandpa will be back shortly alright?

She nod, her eyes still downcast while her lips in a sad pout.

Grandpa also seems to be avoiding looking at her directly and quickly leave with Uncle Jo while I look at them a bit confused and concerned at the same time.

But just as grandpa leave, Tilbe burst into tears surprising me.

I quickly went to her and hug her tight.

What has happened in that room.

Tilbe: Grandpa, grandpa.... he grandpa......!!!

I tried to calm her down as much as I can, saying sweet nothing. Just anything to calm her eratic heart beat and her uncontrollable tears. She will get sick again at this point.

I mean a miracle just happen, which is she does not get sick after the heavy toll her body go through fir practise of the festival like she do every years and we have been celebrating that. And now look.

Axel: Okay little gift, please tell me what happen first alright? Did grandpa said something or did something happen with grandpa?

I pat her back softly while she continue to cry hicupping here and there making me more and more worried.

Should I just call grandpa back?

Axel: Little gift, you have to tell me what is wrong for me to make it alright right?

She said nothing and continue to cry heart breakingly making me more and more worried.

Axel: Iam your Ax remember? I will protect and always looks after you. Won't you tell your Ax what is wrong?

She shake her head in a no making me quite surprised. Little Gift always and I mean always share everything with me. So what happened today taht she can't even share it with me anymore?

Seriously what did grandpa told her?

Tilbe: I don't know...

Oh so thats what she mean, wait what?

What does she mean she dont know?

Axel: Okay if you don't know, why are you crying?

I tried to sound as soft as I can, very much happy not to disturb the little peace I have now. Yes, she has start to stop crying.

Tilbe: I don't know, grandpa just keep on saying things and it seems like he is going far away from us. Why does grandpa sound like he is going away?

She hiccuped and hug me tightly as she complained with a small voice, horrified!

Axel: What do you mean? Why will grandpa go away?

She shake her head in a no.

Tilbe: I don't know, I just... grand...pa just keep on saying to take care and take care of yourself and that I should be happy and stuff... and.. and....

I shuss her and pat her back softly as she start to cry again, hiccuping here and there. She look so disturbed and scared.

I think grandpa have a talk with her like he did with me, and I get why she might misunderstand taht grandpa is going away given the tone of the words. Cause even me, I suspect so for quite a bit.

But then again, why would grandpa ever do away.

But then, why is grandpa doing this?

Why is he saying all this things to us and that too individually? I really gotta ask.

But Tilbe's crying problem first.

I force her out of the hug and wipe her tears softly while she look at me all lost and afraid, hiccuping here and there due to her cries.

Axel: Okay, come sit with me first.

I lead her to the couch and sit us down or rather sit myself down while she lay on the couch, her heads on my laps.

I pat her head softly while talking to her as soft and careful as possible so as to not let her cry again by any means possible.

Axel: Little gift, think about it. Why would grandpa ever go away from us?

Tilbe: Cause of a trip?

I chuckled as she said that looking as serious as ever.

Axel: Well besides that. Grandpa always come back in no time whenever he went to trip right?

She nod although a bit hesitant.

Axel: Okay he did not come back quickly the last time.

This time she nod fully agreeing with me now making me smile at her endearingly.

Axel: But besides trip, did grandpa ever leave us?

She nod in a no while innocently looking up at me as if I have all the answer she ever need.

Axel: Well then why would he do so now? And besides even if he do leave, where would he really go that we can't just snatch our grandpa back?

I jokingly said the last part making little gift ease up a bit as well.

Tilbe: Really?

Axel: Really. Grandpa is our grandpa, he will never leave us. So don't get scared of anything like such again, alright?

She nod although still a bit hesitant.

Tilbe: And you will have me drag grandpa back if he become naughty and ran from us right?

I nod chuckling at her choice of words.

Axel: I promise.

Tilbe: Then why is grandpa talking about all this strange thing that seems like he will no longer be here to take care of us?

Her innocent eye and the truthful fear in her words do scare me, a lot actually. I can't ever imagine grandpa leaving us.

But this is not the time for me to freak out as well.

Axel: Well grandpa always comes up with weird ways to educate us right?

She nod remembering all the things grandpa has done in the name of education, some of them are really weird and some are very very funny but nonetheless we learn each thing from every one of grandpa's lesson.

Axel: Well this must be one of those things, and if it really bother you that much. When grandpa come back, we will ask him all about it and he will answer everything alright?

She nod happy at the solution, while yawning at the same time.

Axel: See, now you are tired. I told you not to cry yourself like this everytime right? You will just get yourself sick at this point.

She pout at my nagging while I just pat her head softly. She yawn again.

Axel: Well if you are sleepy, go to your room and sleep. I will come wake you up when grandpa is back or when dinner is ready.

I tried to move as I said that but she stop me from doing so but making a very disagreed growl like sound.

Axel: Is my little gift turning into a grumpy gift or a cat?

She huff is complain as I said that.

Tilbe: I don't want to sleep in my room. It is very comfortable here and is also warm.

And she snuggle further into me while basking in the sunlight.

The sun come through directly from the window so it indeed is quite pleasant and warm put here.

Axel: Okay, sleep for a while here.

She smile happily at my suggestions and went back to sleep.

A few five ten minutes in, and she is fast asleep breathing in and out softly and peacefully making me sigh in relief.

Thank god I have managed to calm her down, she got me worried sick that she will be sick at this point.

And besides what is grandpa doing really?

I know I said all kind of things to calm Tilbe down but Iam not really confident or really don't know what Iam saying.

What did grandpa told her that she think he will leave us?

Tilbe is quite intuitive and can catch on to someone intention pretty quickly so there must have been something up, looking at the way in which she react.

This is making me much more worried now.

I hope grandpa come back before Tilbe wakes up, one because I want her to be in peace as quick as possible and secondly because curiousity is also killing me.