What If

Chapter 1

It was all between dreams and slumber.

A sudden thud woke me up from my slumber, like I just fell from the moon back to the ground. From a blurry sight, to a clear one. I woke up in a dark and contained room, without windows. The only source of light I could find was a single lamp sitting on the far side in front of me. That is when I realized, both my hands are tied in the stone wall, and there are injuries all over my body. I couldn't feel any pain, but the cold creeping inside me. I know this isn't real, but a dream.

Just a moment after, I felt the cold water touch my skin. Just a second later, the lamp ran out of light, and I was left in a cold room, slowly being filled with water that is about to suffocate me.

I couldn't do anything. I couldn't move a single nerve, nor is to shout for help. I'm just there, shouting inside my brain, but my mouth just won't cooperate. It's like I've lost every single will to leave, for I'm the only one here. No one can see me, no one can ever hear my inside cry for help. No one can ever know that I am here, waiting for my end. There's no way I could escape this…

I took my final breath just before the water consumed me. Second after, my lungs couldn't take it anymore, I'm running out of breath! Just then, a dark figure came rushing and pressed his mouth on mine, giving some air to my lungs. But things aren't as perfect as they must be, isn't it?

If this is really a dream, can you please wake me up in a peaceful and simple life?

Time. A one thing that no one is able to stop, not control. The one thing that will continue moving even if everything in this earth ever stopped. Time never stops even for a second. It never stopped to wait. Time is the only thing that will keep on going even though everything seemed to stop for you.

But no, time goes on and on. If you stop, then its your choice. It will never stop just to wait for you. You need to follow, or you’ll be left behind.

Time... The one of the most powerful things in the world aside from that of love. It is nothing but time, time that we are waiting for to fulfill out greatest dreams and desires. It is only time that needs not time, because time itself it time. We don't need to gave it time cause it already is the time.

Time is the one that takes it all. Along with the waves of what is known as the ocean of memories, there comes time, and forgiveness, and forget. A one thing that contains the past, the future, and the current present. You’re different from who you are a moment ago, and from whom you will be in a few second. Time flies. It flies like wind that just managed to pass a blow along your way.

The things you are experiencing now, who would know? Maybe in a few minutes, maybe in a few hours, maybe tomorrow… you’d not need to worry about it. Because time already put it up for the past. For us to remember as a part of our life. And those times that you wished will never end, you hoped time would have stopped just to gift you that exact moment in your life, but the fact that there is nothing in this would that would have been able to stop it… is fairly devastating.

We will never know what are the plans for us if we will stay in the past. We will never found out what our destination is if we will not move... That is why time was made. To remove pain and to be replaced by happiness or vice versa. To remove everything and to change it. Just like what the saying have said, nothing is permanent, everything change. Through time, everything will change. No body knows and no one will ever notice not until you see it.

Because time flies, and it flies fast. And there is no means of stopping it. Because no matter how we want to, nor how we try, it would have all a part of the past. But no matter how fast paced it is, we still have our own memories nurture. Either it is happy, or something that is sad, something that is painful of something that is not. The only important thing is that it had already passed. Done. No more. Nothing but a part of thy memories.

"I would be distributing your certificates, okay??" Ma’am Maria, our leadership teacher for this year said with a smile. Clearly jolly we were all able to finish something as complicated as this one.

"Yes coach!!" Everyone replied with a happy sound.

"If that so, let’s go find a venue. We’ll just be distributing these papers and we’re going somewhere to celebrate! Okay! We’ll treat you kids, don’t you worry.” She said ushering us to a small room somewhere near the exit.

It was the guidance office. It was small and quite a size, really, but it was able to cater us all. And we sat there with anticipation. This, there is a possibility this would have been the last day we’ll ever meet each other. With a two week mandatory vacation because of the Covid 19, there’s something that felt rather weird here.

Then, when our coaches entered, they started distributing our papers.

To think that it's already time to bid goodbye of this phrase in life, to bid goodbye to this school I grow on, to bid goodbye of the place I once called home... Because who knows what will happen next?

I look back to the paper they gave us. Another proof that we are indeed done. It was finished. Our leadership training has been done. I sighed. Now… This ones real. It’s really done. This one thing I never thought I would be a part of, one thing that somehow managed to strengthen the bond we have as friends… a one thing that I know would have ended, but never actually thought it to bee this early. Or maybe late. Since the year is ending, must mean everything that comes with it ends with it.

This will be the last leadership training that we will have. Our graduation ceremony, the last Thursday that we will attend. The day that will end up the whole duration. I am happy, but at the same time, I feel sad. It's not the disappointment, but just sad. It just felt like this would be the last day. That everything that will happen after this would not include them. And I fear that. For some reason, I know I fear that.

When we moved out of the room we occupied for about half an hour, our coaches told us to rest for a bit as they try to find somewhere else where we can hold our simple program. And that did not take that long.

"Mika!!" Someone from the group shouted. I turned back to them, it was Jimmy.

"OH?!" I answered back, looking irritated, but not really.

"They’re here. Give them the papers then let’s move on!" He said and pointed out a place. There stood our higher leaders. One we ain’t really that close with.

"Sorry, brain ain’t with us."

"Looks like it." He answered back and walked away. Why can’t he just give the papers to them for me anyways? Tsk tsk. I crunched my nose and moved towards them. See, why can’t they come to me?

"Hello...! Sorry for disturbing you both..." I whispered. Enough for then to hear. As I've thought,

"Yes?" One of them asked. I raised my hand to show them what’s in it.

"Certificates??" I asked and handed them the papers.

That’s it. And then we transferred to a whole new place to celebrate this milestone. We got to a church and there we had a very simple program. Then after that, out coaches treated us fro a meal. It was pretty fun, but not too fun knowing it could actually be the end. That there is a possibility of us never meeting again in the future.

But, well, it was time.

And time is like the wind. It cannot be seen, but can be felt. Time could be a friend, or our greatest enemy. It holds all or most secrets a human could have in their lifetime. Hell, it is even capable of holding existence of life itself. It is only time that could decide, that could show us the truth. It could be a friend when you are lonely, and sad. But it could also be an enemy the moment you felt that joy. Such, such irony. And, it is really just time that could tell us if we’ll ever meet again. It was for it to decide. And for us all to find out. Because, as we all know, we do not know what future holds.

“Huy, let’s go to the usual place? This is going to be the last before the lockdown eh. What do you think?” I suggested, raising my left hand. They all agreed to me on this, despite the fact that we are all tired.

Guess we have similar sentiments, eh?

However much future events are often foreshadowed, we are often afraid of what will happen next, of the future, and of the changes that may happen so suddenly, unexpectedly disturbing the pace we made ourselves comfortable with.