Where Life Meets a New Beginning

Chapter 6 - Who Even Am I?

I knew I couldn’t have been asleep long when I woke up next to Elijah and he was still out cold.

I sat up and began to look around again. We were in an old apartment in the heart of New Orleans. Everything was original to the period it was built, but it was pristine and beautiful. This place had to cost a fortune, as it’s got to be one of the oldest homes in the city.

The large French doors to the balcony sat in an open position, inviting me to come outside and get some fresh air.

I really needed it.

I walked over to the pair of pants Elijah had grabbed for me and pulled them on. This whole day had been so crazy that I somehow was still in my underwear and tank top until then.

Sitting next to the pants laid my phone. Elijah must have also grabbed it when he - did whatever it was he did to get us here.

I think he knew he couldn’t completely shut me away from my life so quickly or I would lose my mind.

I was scared to tap the screen to see how many notifications I had. They would all be from Caleb. I wasn’t supposed to be at work until five and it was only around three now.

I was so mad when I saw two night shifts in a row on my schedule, but I was surely grateful now.

I walked outside on the balcony and then I finally got up the nerve and tapped the screen. My chest grew cold for a moment when it lit up.

There was nothing. Nothing from Caleb at least.

I guess I should have realized that some days we don’t even talk, so why would he be alarmed if I were seemingly out for the day and didn’t say anything?

I wouldn’t be if he did the same to me.

I was both relieved, and upset that Caleb was at home, oblivious to the fact that I was out with another man. And that I wouldn’t be coming home. Or he was at least oblivious for now.

I did have a text from Zoey

So hot stuff, how did last night go?

My stomach dropped. I didn’t even know what to say back to her. Last night was the last normal night of my life.

I just tried to gather myself and type out a response.

I’m actually feeling a bit under the weather tonight and wont be able to make it in. Can you let Darren know? I’m too sick to make the phone call.

Zoey opened the message immediately, no doubt hoping for gossip.

Little dots popped up on the screen indicating that she was typing back and I waited anxiously. I was too distraught to even be able to call the store right now so I needed her to come through.

I got you, but you owe me the hot details later!!

I was a little relieved. I just sent a kissy face and then put my phone back down on the edge of the balcony.

It was then that I felt Elijah’s arms wrap around me from behind.

“Playing hooky, huh?” I turned to look up at him and his gaze nearly took my breath away. He was smiling down at me gently, but I could feel sadness tinging at me even as his presence was calming me so much.

“Well I don’t think I’m gonna be able to go back, and I don’t know what to say or do about that just yet.” I said quietly in response.

His gold eyes all but glowed when he looked down at me and wrapped me tightly in his arms. His dark hair was slightly disheveled from the small nap we’d taken.

It took everything in me to pry my eyes from his face to snuggle mine into his chest while he drew me closer.

“I know this is going to be hard for you Salem, but I will do everything in my power to make you feel better. I can’t replace anything you had in life before, but I will always be here to help fill the spots where it all used to be. I am forever by your side now.”

I began to cry like a baby for probably the tenth time that day. This was all so much. I was so happy but I was also so upset. I had no idea when these conflicting feelings would ever end.

But then it clicked. I did know. I knew when they would end. And I wanted it to happen now. I didn’t want to go through the pain of this whole process. I didn’t want to feel the loss of Caleb. Or my friends. I needed to change and I needed to do it now. I hated dealing with things head on and I didn’t want to start.

Elijah was still holding me close and slightly rocking back and forth when I dried up my tears and spoke again.

“I have to die.” I said bleakly.

“I know it sounds really scary right now but it’s who you’re meant to be. Everything will make more sense to you soon.” He was trying to reason with me but he didn’t understand what I was saying.

“No. Ive already accepted it. I have to die. Kill me now. So I can stop feeling all of this pain and confusion and be this person you say I’m meant to be. It’ll make all of this easier, won’t it?”

He pulled back and took my hands in his as my back rested on the balcony.

“It doesn’t work that way. It could be dangerous if you’re not ready.” This was all the explanation he offered.

I began to get angry. “ME, dangerous? I’m the dangerous one in this situation? Even once I’ve ‘ascended’ or whatever you call it I’ve obviously never even been around someone of my kind so how will I even know how to use all of these crazy powers I’m supposed to have! Why can’t you just make this situation better for me? It’s your fault that I’m in it!”

I felt Elijah’s pain so much this time. I could also see it on his face. I wanted to fall to my knees. Hurting him effected me in a way that none of this has yet.

I began to plead right away, “Elijah I am so sorry, I didn’t mean it. I’m so upset but I don’t want to hurt you. This feels awful. I am so sorry.”

“Shhh, Salem stop.” He grabbed me and the feelings of hurt began to fade. “This is gonna be hard and you have to face it. I know that you don’t want to but this is happening. It’s all real right now and the fact that you’re so willing to gamble your own death to get away from pain makes me sad. You are strong, and you can make it through this. You are meant for greatness. The fact that you are so strong and you have no idea what’s going on is precisely the reason why it would be so dangerous to let you ascend. You won’t be able to control yourself in the beginning, especially if you don’t understand what’s happening to you.”

I was silent for a moment, just staring up at him with tears that started to feel as if they were permanently resting on my eyelids, ready to fall at a moments notice, because everything was setting me off.

If I couldn’t skip all of this, then I suppose i could at least try to skip part of it.

“Will you f**k me then?” He almost buckled when I said it. I could feel erotic energy begin to electrify between us as soon as the words left my mouth.

He cleared his throat and closed his eyes. He had one hand on my face, and the other on my waist, and I could feel his bulge in his pants against me already. I pressed into it with my waist.

“I told you I don’t know what will happen. And you have to remember that because I already ascended long ago, all of these feelings are even more intense for me than they are for you. I already had to deal with this morning, and being so close to you while you were half naked the whole time. If you say something like that again I don’t know if I’ll be able to handle it. Do you really want to risk making this harder for yourself when you already are trying to run so far away from it?”

All of his words came out like liquid. I knew he was right but just the warmth of his breath on my skin as he spoke was driving me crazy now. I don’t know how these feelings could possibly be any more amplified.

“You said you didn’t know. That means it could also get better, and that I’d forget all about Caleb. I’d be entirely yours for good. Isn’t that what you want?”

I’d began to run my fingers along his pant line at his waist again, hoping to replicate the reaction he had this morning.

He groaned in response as i teased him more, letting my fingers slip down and slightly push his pants and underwear lower.

Before I could say anything else he pressed his lips to mine and kissed me hard. He turned me around, pushing me back into the apartment and shutting the balcony doors behind us.

He kissed me all the way over to the bed and literally ripped his shirt off on the way. He threw me down and crawled on top of me.

I was already throbbing in between my legs. I knew I’d be dripping wet.

This time I reached for him first. I grabbed his d**k from outside of his pants. I’d already felt it pressed against me so I knew it was big, but wow it was big. I was thankful I wasn’t a virgin.

In response to me grabbing him, he took my boob in his hand and squeezed and bit my lip. I yelped but he didn’t stop. He knew that I liked it because we could literally feel the sensations that we were giving each other.

I ripped his belt out of the pant loops and pulled his c**k out of his pants. I couldn’t get it out fast enough. I began to push my hand up and down the length of his shaft, and he moaned against my lips in between kisses.

Just touching his manhood made me need him so bad. He was so hard that I could feel it throbbing.

His hand made his way down to my c**t once again, but this time he want straight into my pants. His fingers were swirling around all of my wetness, and I whimpered below him.

“Please f**k me. I need you inside of me so bad.”

We were so close to each other. I couldn’t stop. I needed him.

“You know I can’t Salem. I don’t want to make things harder for you. If you hurt.. I hurt. I hate to see you cry and I’ve already seen it so many times.”

He was speaking in a low whisper, right next to my ear. I could feel his breath on my neck. I didn’t care what he had to say. I was upset and I wanted to feel better. My body was literally screaming to me to make love to him, and the fact that he didn’t want to just so that things wouldn’t be harder for me only made me want him worse.

I didn’t respond. I just began to kiss him again and take what I could get.

Then something happened as if it were in response to him telling me no.

All of a sudden all of the air escaped from my lungs and I was breathless. everything felt so loud and then it was suddenly quiet. I looked up at Elijah in confusion. He stopped and looked confused too. And then I felt it. I felt our heart beats, they were beating together. I looked up at him with only the sound of our hearts booming in my ears and then he understood what was happening.

I began to cry once again, but this time because it felt like my world had been ripped apart and moved around to tailor itself to my love for Elijah. It had now happened to us both.

Our spirits were dancing together, begging us to make love and finish the Solus Bond. I knew deep down that whatever higher power I was facing in that moment let me feel his heart with mine, because we were supposed to solidify the bond. I had no idea what any of this was, but I knew this to be fact down to my bones.

I felt myself begin to breathe again and the tears started to dry up from my face. I looked up at him, still above me, and still embracing my body next to his.

I whispered “I love you.”

The energy inside of us was about to boil over, and he knew that he couldn’t tell me no anymore.

He then tore my clothes off of me, and gently but swiftly slid his rock hard c**k deep inside of me. I gasped in ecstasy, my back arched high. I’d never felt anything like this before. He was almost shaking on top of me, as our lips stayed locked and we began to make love.

He moved in and out of me, slowly at first, and I could feel his hands taking in all the parts of my body. Our souls felt like they were one as our bodies vibrated from all of the feelings we were sharing.

I could swear that the silhouette of our naked forms crashing together was glowing.

He began to go faster as I screamed louder and louder. Every time he slammed back deep inside of me I felt like I would explode from the pleasure.

He stopped kissing me and sat upright to rub my c**t as he made his strokes but he never missed a beat. I was clawing at the sheets, and making noises I’d never heard myself make.

At this point I had no idea how many orgasms I’d had. I think I came as soon as he slid inside of me. His d**k was made to pleasure me. It fit inside of my p***y like a puzzle piece.

I could feel that he was about to climax. His body began to tense on top of me as he came back down close, pressing his skin against mine. I thought we would melt together because he felt so connected to me. His lips were crashing into mine again.

He came inside of me and it began to run out of me instantly because there was so much. He didn’t stop but I didn’t want him to. As he continued, I knew that we could both feel our souls melding together into one. We both knew that our bond could never be broken now, not until the day we die.

He looked into my eyes.

“I love you so much Salem. You are mine forever. I want to f**k you like this and pleasure you for the rest of our days.”

Then he rolled me over on top of him and we kept going. We f****d for hours. In every position you could think of. We f****d all over the whole apartment. Every time he came again and I thought we would stop we just didn’t.

Time flew by and before I knew it we were finally just laying next to each other, completely naked and breathless.

It was dark out now. I looked up to a clock on the wall and it read 9:30 pm. It was almost 10. We’d been making love for six hours but it felt like just a few minutes.

He began to trace circles onto my skin with his fingertips. His every touch felt like it lingered there and made me quiver.

”Are you hungry, my love? You must be exhausted.” Elijah asked me.

I giggled in response. “Me, tired? You were the one doing all the work.”

Elijah grabbed his phone opened a food delivery app. “We’ll stay here together, and order takeout. Whatever you’d like.”

My face turned white and I came to a realization that hadn’t even occurred to me yet.

He became alarmed “What’s wrong, love?”

“Don’t you eat like - people?” I asked in response.

He began to laugh uncontrollably as soon as the words left my mouth.

“What? I mean you’re a vampire, are you not?” I snorted. He was being so mean. I had no idea what was going on.

He could tell I was starting to get upset and he calmed down.

“Awh Salem, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you upset. This has all just happened so fast for us both. I forget that you’re learning as you go. I do drink blood. And a lot of it, you’re right about that. But it’s a lot more civilized than you would think. There are plenty of rotten apples in the supernatural world that do take lives and perpetuate the bad things people think about us. Those of us who are civilized, though, we prefer to just compel someone at a blood bank to give us some bags. Check the fridge and you’ll see I’m telling the truth.”

I walked over to the fridge and opened the door. To my surprise, there was a fridge full of food but the sandwich drawer was also filled with blood bags. I guess I felt better but there was just still SO MANY questions.

“So you don’t like, bite people’s necks?”

“Only yours, Love.”

My eyes widened and my head snapped over to him.

“What?”

“Our society is civilized. We don’t drink from the source. The only time we actually do, is within the Solus Bond. Because we are one entity together, it is very beneficial for us to feed from each other.”

I had made my way back over to the bed, and before I could plop down he just pulled me into his arms next to him. We were face to face.

“It’s also very intimate. When we bite each other, it causes.. feelings. Erotic ones.” His fingers were trailing the length of my body as he spoke.

I shuddered.

“Have you ever bit someone before?” I don’t know why I asked because I didn’t want to know the answer. I got sad before he could even respond.

He grabbed my chin, and looked into my eyes.

“Never. I’ve spent my whole life waiting for you.”

My heart swelled. This whole thing was insane. Who even am I? Yesterday I felt guilty because I was getting dolled up over a crush for work, and today I’m literally a different species laying next to my soul mate that I met less than a week ago.

Another thought dawned on me. Yesterday, I was in fact someone different. I was with Caleb. I felt an emptiness inside of me where I was mourning just hours ago. The part of me that cared for Caleb was gone.

I glanced over at my phone and I didn’t want to check it just because of the cold feeling I knew I would have if he were looking for me.

Elijah noticed that my mind was spiraling around and grew concerned. He knew what I was thinking about.

“You can still feel the part of you that cares for him, cant you?” He asked so wistfully.

I looked back at him blankly.

“No. I can’t. An entire part of me is just gone. I can feel it.”

If he could have hid his happiness, I know he would have, but he couldn’t. I didn’t blame him either. I would feel the same way. The thought of Elijah having even a nice thought about another woman makes me murderous. I just feel like there’s a void deep inside of me.

“I remember when I ascended. I was lost for a long time. Even if you’ve known that you would lose part of yourself your whole life, it doesn’t prepare you for what it actually feels like. This could only be part of it for you, too, because you haven’t actually ascended. The part of you who cared for someone else is probably just the beginning. We don’t actually know how this is going because someone like you hasn’t ever been known to exist.”

He paused for a moment.

“I’m probably not helping at all. The beginning is hard. Your spirit has been holding two souls for all of your time. Two versions of yourself. At first you feel so empty because half of you is literally gone. But as time goes by, you will grow and so will your second soul. It grows and fills the parts of you that feel empty because it is all that’s there now. And please just remember, I will be there to do whatever I need to do to make sure you wake up every day with a smile on your face. It is all I am on this earth for now.”

I changed the subject. I didn’t want to hear any more about how much of a freak I am and how he doesn’t even know what’s gonna happen to me.

“You said you ascended long ago. How old are you?”

“I knew this was gonna come up. Don’t freak out, okay?”

I just nodded. I couldn’t promise anything but not much was surprising me at this point.

“Im 398. I’m just about to reach another century in age. I ascended when I was 24.”

I just looked up at the ceiling. “Well, at least I won’t ever have to worry about wrinkles.”

“You took that well.” Elijah raised an eyebrow.

“I’ve been crying and freaking out all day. Now a part of me is literally gone and all that’s left of my identity right now is my love for you. I don’t think I’m in a place to be picky.”

He pulled me closer to him. “No, you’re not. Because you are mine forever.”

We were both smiling, just looking at each other.

I rolled over and he spooned me from behind, no doubt watching what I was about to do.

I grabbed my phone and opened my texts between Caleb and I. He literally hadn’t said anything. He didn’t even notice or care that we hadn’t spoken all day and he also had not seen me.

I typed out the message that I thought I would never have the courage to because I’ve always been so afraid of doing things that might be better for me.

It’s over Caleb. I’m not coming home tonight, or ever again. It shouldn’t feel any different to you because you never paid any attention to me anyway. Have a nice life.

Then I turned my phone off, and didn’t think about it again for the rest of the night.