Uncle's Hands

MY FEELINGS

My mom was responsible for my feelings for uncle Levi. But it is my responsibility to make sure he reciprocates them this summer. This is the reason I am returning home after so long... because of my uncle’s hands.

The tires of my suitcase slam on the concrete, and I am blinking through the nostalgia that hits. Taking a deep breath, I remind myself of what has brought me back here. My eyes flutter shut, and I can see it, as clear as day, his hands sliding up my thigh... someone bumps into me, bringing me back to the present. The scenery had dissolved into a sea of passersby who were hurrying out of a flight or trying to get on one.

In the back of an overpriced airport taxi, I watched the scenery fly by me. It had been a while since I was back, and the last time I was here I stayed for a day, returning to school the very next day.

Fuck it. I can’t do this sober. I fingered the pendant that dangled from my neck and, pushing down the small lock, I found the case empty.

“Fuck.” It came out small and under my breath, I must have taken the last one and forgot about it, just then my phone dinged with a reminder to get a refill from J. It was too late for that now, J was a lot of miles away.

Alcohol would have to do...

I ask for the driver to drop me off at the store, and with my suitcase in hand, I scan the store for liquor. It was exactly as I remembered it, my friends and I used to come here. This store had the most relaxed cashiers, they sold alcohol to minors because they were too high to check our ID.

Chuckling to myself, I found a bottle of my favorite wine, it had a lot of memories attached to it, all of them with blurry edges.

“Zo?”

My spine straightened at the sound of his voice, my eyes already scanning through the scanty customers browsing the aisles, and finally they found him. A small gasp leaves my mouth as I stare.

He looked even better, his hair unlike my father's with a few gray strands, uncle Levi had a head full of black hair, his striking brown eyes raking me in. I try not to stare and fail.

The man was beautiful, an expanse of broad shoulders, chiseled features gave him a rugged handsomeness and hands that deserved to be worshiped. My uncle had a well groomed beard-- I have itched to run my fingers through it for the longest time.

His eyes found my suitcase, understanding dawning in his eyes, he crossed the distance between us, a huge smile on his face. He stopped a few feet away from me,

“You came back, does Tommy know?”

I bristle at the mention of my father, and shake my head.

There was relief and apprehension in his eyes. He must be thinking about the last time I was here, now I was also thinking about it. My eyes scan behind him, I hold my breath as I scan the entire row. She was nowhere to be found.

“I do the grocery shopping alone.” he says, halting my movements, and I returned my eyes to him. Did I mention that my uncle was tall? My father looked like a dwarf when they stood together.

“I was hoping to surprise everyone. Surprise!” I said a little breathlessly, my mind would not stop racing, it would not stop replaying events from the last time I was here, the one my uncle probably doesn’t remember. We were both drunk out of our minds.

He laughed, an infectious laugh that made everyone turn their heads, my stomach clenched at the sound. I missed it. I used to try to make him laugh occasionally to hear it, and it worked, everything I did seemed to amuse him.

“Your father and I have been talking about a barbecue for the longest time. I think your presence is a good reason to turn on the grill.” he says as he collects the bottle from my grip, his fingers brush mine briefly, sending a jolt of electricity between us.

He must feel it too, if the way his mouth parted silently was any indication, my throat went dry, and I looked up to find him staring at me intently. My cheeks burned under his stare, but I waited, willing my arms to stay by my side, he had to make the first move.

He cleared his throat nosily as he put the bottle in his cart. Turning away from me, he plucked a few more bottles, dumped them into his cart, and he moved to the meat section. I put my hand on my racing heart, trying to calm myself down.

“Stop getting excited, nothing has happened yet.” I murmured to myself before following behind him.

I watched as his hands expertly picked things from the rows, he knew what we needed, he always knew what everyone needed, except for the one thing I desperately needed, him. He didn’t know that. But that was why I came back, to get him out of my system and move on with my life.

“Your father is more of a beer person, Kate too...” he muttered to himself as he picked up a pack of beer and then another.

I refuse to think about Kate, instead I think about his hands slipping under my skirt, till today, it is unclear if it actually happened or my mind was making up for what it thought had happened.

“Will you be staying for a while?” he asks when he puts everything in the trunk of his car. Uncle Levi had the best looking car in town. He was a car person. Unlike me, I didn’t know the names of any cars. But I know people loved to take pictures with it, and he always let them with a smile.

“Do you want me to stay for a while?” I asked him, resting against the car. I meet his eyes, and he looks away, using my suitcase as an excuse.

“Your father hasn’t seen you in a while...”

“I wasn’t asking about your best friend’s opinion... I am asking you, Levi Wright, do you want me to stay for a while?”

He finally looks up, pushing a button to lock the trunk, he walks around me and opens the passenger side for me. I don’t break eye contact while I walk up to the car and climb in, even when he closes the door, our eyes don’t leave each other.

Then he breaks it by walking back to the driver’s side.

“It is your choice, Zoey Tribbiani.”

I chuckle at the use of my full name,

“That wasn’t what you said to me the last time I asked.”

He gave me a sidelong glance, and his eyes fell on my mouth. He remembers, he quickly looks away, but I know he remembers.

“What did I say?”

I study his side profile, as he brought the engine to life. I could see him above me, his eyes shut in ecstasy as we rode the waves of pleasure together. This image had plagued me, it kept me from doing things with other guys, I had to get him out of my system.

“You asked me to stay, right before you kissed me.”