The House of Angels

Let it rain

"I'm sorry, Josh, I can't." Moon just said, before running out of her room. She just wanted to leave that place, she had no time to deal with Daniel's problems. Hell, she didn't even care, the first and only person she was going to take care of from now on, was herself.

"Moon! f**k, Moon, please wait!" Lucas called, approaching her.

"What, Lucas?" She asked, trying to be polite, since Lucas had always been friendly and kind to her.

"Listen, you can't leave without Josh. He has to know where you're going to spend the night or Sister Mary will get angry..." he said, frowning.

"Did you come here to tell me this...?" She asked, suspicious.

"Well... maybe Josh asked me to... you know... make you stay until he makes sure Daniel is ok." He said, rubbing his neck awkwardly.

"Oh, cazzo, perché non potete lasciarmi in pace? (Oh, f**k, why can't you all leave me alone?)" She scoffed, folding her arms.

"I'm sorry, what?" Fortunately Lucas couldn't understand.

"Nothing." She sighed. "Can you, at least, tell me what's this story? Why can't you let me be?" She was extremely annoyed.

"Moon, we're a family. And like it or not, you're stuck here with us, and you're going to become part of our family. Just, Daniel's not the monster you think he is. He's not what Helena told you this morning." He frowned, looking at the ground.

"You... how do you know?" She asked, surprised.

"I overheard... I was going to the music room and I heard everything. Yes, Daniel's done some mistakes and his mood is unstable, but believe me if I tell you he's got a big heart. It's not my story to tell, but if you're patient enough, Josh will tell you everything in due time." He made eye contact with her, taking one step forward.

"I have no family. Don't come and feed me this bullshit about family and brotherly love, ok?" She hissed, annoyed by all those mysteries.

"We're all damaged goods, Moon." He said with shaking voice. "We need to rely on each others. It's a shame you don't want to understand. For your information, Daniel is feeling like s**t. He remembers what happened earlier and he'll certainly avoid you. He feels guilty and embarrassed."

"Well, I don't want that. I know something was wrong wih him, I knew the moment I saw his eyes. But, as you said, we're all damaged goods. I've spent all my life as a punching bag and I'm sorry if I stay away from someone who threatened my safety, even if that someone wasn't himself when he did it." She bit hard her lower lip and clenched her fists to hold back her tears.

"Moon..." Lucas whispered with shaking voice, frowning. He approached her and took her hands in his. "I'm sorry...I'm so sorry..."

"I don't want Daniel to feel guilty. I'm only trying to protect myself, you know?" She whispered.

"I know. And you're right. But think about what I told you." He stroked her upper arms.

"Ok, I will." She smiled at him.

Lucas had this weird superpower, he calmed and attracted people, he always seemed to know what to say and what to do, he'd also managed to arrest Moon's panic attack.

"Moon, you're here!!" Panted a breathless Josh: he seemed to have run to reach her before she could leave without him.

"Yeah." She shrugged.

"How's Daniel?" Lucas asked.

"He's ashamed." He said, glancing subtly at Moon. "But he's ok. He's showering. We're going out tonight, to keep him busy. Tell Charlie. Keep an eye on him, I'm giving Moon a ride. Later." He said.

"Alright. Later, J. Bye, Moon." Lucas smiled heading toward the house.

"Bye, Lucas. Thank you." She smiled at him.

He winked st her.

"What was that?" Josh lifted an eyebrow, curious. More jealous than curious, actually.

"We talked a little. Shall we go? I'm already late." She smirked.

"Were you caressing each other or did I see it wrong?" He scoffed, opening the passenger door for Moon. "M'lady!" He grinned.

"Are you jealous, Josh?" She wiggled her eyebrows playfully.

"So, what if I am?" He said getting in the car and looking straight into her eyes.

"Well, stop it. I'm not only yours to flirt with." She said, to provoke him.

"Ouch, you just broke my heart." He laughed, putting a hand on his chest playfully.

"Anyway... shall we talk about Daniel?" Josh asked cautiously, sighing.

"What do you want to say? Turn right." She said, giving him directions to reach Malika's house.

"He asked about you as soon as I entered my room, you know." He said softly.

"What did he say? Keep going this way." She felt uncomfortable talking about that.

"He asked if he'd hurt you. If you were mad at him. I told him that you were unharmed and that maybe you were a little... pissed?" He glanced at her before returning his attention back on the road.

"I'm not pissed. I'm protecting myself." She glared at him.

"It is understandable." He just said, not wanting to piss her off. He would come up with something to make things right later.

"So were are you really going?" He asked.

"What?" She asked, confused.

"Oh, come on, you're not really expecting me to believe you're going to a sleepover dressed like that, are you?" He snorted.

"Ahhh, yeah. We're going to a party." She shrugged, checking herself on her hand mirror.

"What party?" He asked cautiously.

"I don't know, Malika didn't tell me." She said, applying some more lipstick.

"Ok, just to be safe, could you text me your location as soon as you arrive there?

"Sure, no problem."

"And, please don't let anyone near your glass. And stick with your friends, don't go anywhere alone. And if, for any reason, you feel uncomfortable or in danger, a blank text or a ring is enough for me. Ok?"

"Oh God Josh, it's alright, I'll be ok, it's not like it's my first party, you know." She rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, last night you... ended up doing weird things. Just don't get wasted, ok?"

"Are you referring to the college girl?" She blushed, looking at the road.

"Not only that... do you remember that I almost undressed you?" It was his turn to blush.

"Yeah. I keep having flashbacks." She finally looked at him.

"I would've gone further if Daniel hadn't interrupted us." It was a whisper, but she'd heard it.

"Who says I was going to let you...?" She smirked smugly.

"I just wanted to try my luck." He winked at her.

"I was abused, Josh." She blurted out without thinking, staring blankly at the road.

Josh hit the brakes and pulled up on the side of the road.

He just turned to look at her carefully, not daring to say a word. It wasn't his place to ask anything. He waited patiently for her to take her time to process, to find the words.

Moon looked at him, uncertain. She was studying his eyes, his face, but she didn't know how to muster the courage to tell him anything else. To be able not to cry in front of him while reminiscing her painful memories.

It was late afternoon and the sun was starting to set, the sky was colored in light shades of blue and pink, the white of the clouds merged with the dark yellow rays of the sun, turning a suggestive golden shade to the air.

The radio played "The house of the rising sun", and a light breeze was blowing through the open windows. Moon focused on her heartbeat, trying to prevent another panic attack.

"That bastard..." Josh muttered under his breath.

"Oh, no. It wasn't my father. He was awful but never touched me in that sense." She whispered, getting off the car to take some air, she felt claustrophobic inside that car.

Josh got off the car as well, approaching her who was leaning against the side of the car with her arms folded, her eyes dull.

"It was that b***h's brother. Clayton." She said bitterly. She felt ashamed and guilty. She'd spent the last two years telling herself she wasn't the one to blame, but she couldn't help but feel dirty.

"Who's the b***h?" He wrapped his right arm around her shoulder in a protective way.

"My father's wife. At first, my father didn't give a f**k about me. Then my grandmother died and I went to live with him and that awful woman. She started to threaten me and used to take advantage of my father's perpetually unconscious state to manipulate him against me. Then, one day, her brother began to come visit us. He was a tall and well-built man in his thirties, and he was handsome. Well, at least I thought he was. I was a needy and naive little fourteen years-old, rejected by her own father, and he was an older, beautiful man, the only one who was kind to me, and kept telling me sweet things and giving me presents whenever he came by. He won my trust. He usually came for dinner, got wasted with my father and his w***e and then go home. But he always found time and excuses to spend time alone with me." Moon paused. Only then, she realized she'd been crying. She wiped away the tears and took a deep, shaky breath, to find the will to keep going. Josh thightened his grip on her shoulders, he felt that she was getting ready to tell the worst part.

"Then, after about three months, one night attempted to touch me under the dinner table. I was shocked and disgusted, so I excused myself and went into my room. It was late night, I think, one moment I was peacefully sleeping, the next I was woken up by a deep, sharp pain, and..." her voice cracked, her lips quivered and her body shook with sobs.

Josh jerked her toward him and hugged her so tightly that she was left breathless in his comforting arms. But she felt a little better, knowing he was there for her.

After a few minutes she felt ready to continue.

"I was shocked and the pain was so intense I tried to push him away but he was bigger and stronger than me. I remember he smelled of cheap gin and sweat. So I just closed my eyes and pictured myself with my grandmother in the garden of our beautiful house, planting daisies and drinking fresh lemonade as we did when she was still there to protect me. I let him do that to me, do you understand?" She cried, so loud and bitterly that Josh felt a sharp pain in the heart. That angel was literally blaming herself for being r***d by that damned pedophile.

He wiped her tears away and kissed her cheeks tenderly.

"No, Moon. Look me in the eyes. Please." He whispered softly. She uncertainly glanced at him, her big, green eyes red and swollen like her beautiful, inviting lips.

"You didn't let him do anything." He said, and she looked at the ground. "Look at me, Moon."

He cupped her face with his hands, lifting it to make eye contact again.

"He is a f*****g motherfucker, a pervert, a pedophile, he is trash, and he took advantage of a fuorteen years old while she was sleeping in her bed and had made it clear that was not interested. HE is the one to blame, Moon! Not you! What could you do? You said he was bigger and stronger than you. It's not your fault, Moon, damn it!" He said hugging her again.

Then he leaned back and looked at her again. Silent tears flowed down his caramel cheeks, his jaw clenched to hold back his sobs.

"I... I should have fought." She wiped her tears away.

"He would've hurt you more. Maybe he would've killed you." He breathed, overwhelmed.

"Better dead than having to go through what came after." She said with a bitter smile.

"What do you mean?" He stiffened.

"He kept doing that. After that night he came for me, with the attitude of a man in love, telling me I was his little princess, that he'd thought about me all night and that now I was his. I could barely walk and felt sick of myself, I felt disgusting and I knew I couldn't tell anyone. I knew no one would care. So he made a habit of coming everyday and after making sure to give my father enough drugs to pass out, he would come in my room. I tried to keep him away. To lock my door. But he would always find a way to reach me and he could get very angry and hurt me more if I didn't cooperate. One night he even broke my window to enter. He was always stalking me, I couldn't go out without him following me and he would get mad if any guy tried talking to me. I feared him. I was a puppet and he was the puppeteer." She leand back on the car.

"It's... how... I mean. How did you manage to get rid of him?" He asked, cautious.

"This is a story for another day." She said straightening herself.

"You've gone through a lot of s**t. I'm sorry."

Josh smiled sadly at her. He didn't want to try his luck asking more.

"Josh why are you so kind to me?" She asked with soft eyes, as the first drops of a summer storm slowly mingled with their tears.

"Because you are family now." He stroked her cheek tenderly with his knuckes, wiping away tears and rain.

"I thought you liked me..." she smiled, lively.

"Yeah, let's say that the term 'family' in this case takes on a broader meaning..." he leaned further toward her, his gentle eyes on her lips.

"Oh yeah?" She whispered, her chest raising and falling fastly, her tongue darted out to lick her lower lip. She wanted him to kiss her so bad it hurt. She wanted to wash away the guilt, the shame, the regrets. With the rain and his soft lips. Those soft lips that always whispered nice things to her. Those lips that opened to support and cherish and protect her.

"Moon, it's raining on us..." he giggled softly with longing eyes.

"Let it rain, Josh..." she smiled sweetly as his lips landed gently on hers.